xUnknown Posted November 9, 2013 Posted November 9, 2013 I think if you read from page one on you can get a sense of why and how better...I don't see it as mind games on my end, I am pretty straight forward. I feel he has been playing games. I mentioned how he went out I town and asked me to house sit, which he shouldn't have asked me and he said how he misses me and if I miss him. And asking me to join his gym and I remember he said he cried over me and if I go out he asked if it's a date. And asked basically if I still have pics of him on my phone and all this stuff. And even after we broke up he still wanted to meet my sister. And then joking I'm your grill friend again but when he's serious says I'm his friend. And asking me why I don't visit him at work anymore which is only a few mins away... And you say I still love him yet refers me as a friend. That's mind games which is frustrating before I use to be upfront but not as much because I don't wanna put myself out there and at this point, I don't see the point of such. But i know I'm staying to withdraw because I don't really call or text and when he says he misses me it doesn't excite or anything I'm more indifferent. I'm not saying I don't care about him still but the feelings are fading. I use to visit him at his office not anymor, use to bring or cool food for him not anymore. Use to get mad if he didn't call not anymore. I'm actually considering going cold turkey so that there's absolutely no feelings left. I feel like he's trying to keep me around with the games... I guess I did want him but logically I'm a lot younger I need to be with a man I can have a future with. Also, seeing his immaturity has turned me off. I guess I'm around because so he can be a transition because now I can actually see myself with other men. His friend who is a snake because he tried to get at me thinks he is whipped and loves me but doesn't know what to do. I don't know about that. I guess it's confusing because I feel like its one foot in and one foot out. Okay, everything you said above seems to point to something more profound then "mind games"...at least to me. He gave you a house key. Nobody gives someone they don't care about (or even FWB) a house key. You would visit him at work and bring him food. He introduced you to his friends and family and wanted to meet yours. Here is what it sounds like to me. He's joking about you being his girlfriend, because that is what he wants. You mentioned he has anxiety about initiating sex, perhaps he is the same way about making things official with you. He "jokes" about it to see how YOU will respond. Again, it seems like you two are passing the ball back and forth to see whos going to take the shot with it. You both hint/joke at it, because you both want the other person to sack up and say "YES! Lets be official". You need closure on this. If you had that, you wouldn't be here. I think you should ask him if he wants things to be "exclusive" between you two. He'll probably make some joke about it, then you re-iterate that fact that you are serious. If he says no, then say Bye and walk out of his life, and go NC. 1
Author BlueIvy Posted November 9, 2013 Author Posted November 9, 2013 Okay, everything you said above seems to point to something more profound then "mind games"...at least to me. He gave you a house key. Nobody gives someone they don't care about (or even FWB) a house key. You would visit him at work and bring him food. He introduced you to his friends and family and wanted to meet yours. Here is what it sounds like to me. He's joking about you being his girlfriend, because that is what he wants. You mentioned he has anxiety about initiating sex, perhaps he is the same way about making things official with you. He "jokes" about it to see how YOU will respond. Again, it seems like you two are passing the ball back and forth to see whos going to take the shot with it. You both hint/joke at it, because you both want the other person to sack up and say "YES! Lets be official". You need closure on this. If you had that, you wouldn't be here. I think you should ask him if he wants things to be "exclusive" between you two. He'll probably make some joke about it, then you re-iterate that fact that you are serious. If he says no, then say Bye and walk out of his life, and go NC. We were official but broke up about 2 months ago. Thanks for the advice.
Author BlueIvy Posted November 17, 2013 Author Posted November 17, 2013 Okay, everything you said above seems to point to something more profound then "mind games"...at least to me. He gave you a house key. Nobody gives someone they don't care about (or even FWB) a house key. You would visit him at work and bring him food. He introduced you to his friends and family and wanted to meet yours. Here is what it sounds like to me. He's joking about you being his girlfriend, because that is what he wants. You mentioned he has anxiety about initiating sex, perhaps he is the same way about making things official with you. He "jokes" about it to see how YOU will respond. Again, it seems like you two are passing the ball back and forth to see whos going to take the shot with it. You both hint/joke at it, because you both want the other person to sack up and say "YES! Lets be official". You need closure on this. If you had that, you wouldn't be here. I think you should ask him if he wants things to be "exclusive" between you two. He'll probably make some joke about it, then you re-iterate that fact that you are serious. If he says no, then say Bye and walk out of his life, and go NC. He gives mixed messages... he referred to his house as our house. I wore his slippers without asking and he mentioned I didn't ask and I replied, that I didn't know it was a problem. And he said it wasn't and that I am not a guest and pretty much have access to everything in his house and I didn't have to ask. He also said I live here and only thing short of that is me leaving my clothes over. I have a toothbrush he brought that's still there. When we slept in the same bed, which he actually didn't want me too big his bed is small for both of us. I insisted on sleeping in same bed,lol. And he mentioned how I insisted on sleeping in his bed uninvited so I said fine I'll take note and this will be last time. And then he said that's messed up and then he will really miss me. And I said you don't what you have til its gone and he replied I do know what I have. And he mentioned how it's hard being in the same bed with a young beautiful woman and said it's like an alcoholic being around someone who drinks. He also mentioned if we aren't in a relationship why am I in the same bed with him. Yeah, so last week I was at his house for almost the whole weekend and we didn't engage in sex, just made out and cuddled. I didn't bring it up, IDK why,
Recommended Posts