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Posted

I have problems with women's past. That's my problem. In the start of our relationship, I would inquire about her past lovers and attempt to deal with the outcome. One day, she told me that she had slept with a guy and then told me who it was...I was shocked to hear that it was the same guy who had basically tortured me with his buddies at a concert a few years back because of a fight I had with someone in the group.

 

It was extremely hard to swallow but I did, eventually, after breaking up with her and reuniting. I however developed social anxiety when with her seeing as I did NOT want to meet this guy under any circumstances with her.

 

I saw a shrink and went for a month. We had a good time but my anxieties came back when I was looking at other ''gangster'' types and I asked if she had slept with any of them. She denied that but burst out in anger and basically broke up with me.

 

I asked her: ''If it would fix all of my anxiety and trust issues if you would just tell me all of the men you slept with, would you?'' and she answered no.

She said that there were things that she was ashamed of and I can't be in a relationship where there are skeletons in the closet. I'm naturally inquisitive/curious but I don't know if that's is.

 

Anyhow, my quality of life was severely reduced in the relationship due to the issues I was developing while trying to fix my other issues and I would just like some input. Just any opinions...She won't answer me, obviously and I don't really want her back either. Still, I am so devastated that I can barely breathe..

Posted

You should concentrate on yourself and then you will realize what is right for you and be ready to handle a relationship

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Posted

Well she decided to send me a list of all the remaining men that I didn't know about.

 

I feel a million times better and I feel that I can finally start this relationship, knowing the foundation which I am about to build on.

 

Is this un-normal?

Posted

Do you really think that will fix all your issues?

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Posted

I honestly do, to some degree, yes.

 

I feel so much better knowing that I won't have to wonder every time I see a 'gangster' type of guy on facebook. I can know for sure and it won't torment me.

 

ALL my issues? No. I will still have jealousy issues but I feel that I have won a great battle.

Posted

She will leave you soon, because you are insecure.

 

Sorry for being so blunt

  • Author
Posted

Looks like we have a psychic in the thread.

Posted

Have you told her about your past? The women who have had sex with? It's only fair but if you meet a woman and she's had past relationships it's history and there isn't anything you can do about it. Same goes for you too.

Posted

Have you made any progress in therapy?

 

If these are obsessive, intrusive thoughts it makes me think of OCD.

  • Like 1
Posted
Looks like we have a psychic in the thread.

 

easy to read the signs man, easy to read the signs

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Posted
easy to read the signs man, easy to read the signs

Yes, I am in psychic therapy at the moment.

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Posted
Have you made any progress in therapy?

 

If these are obsessive, intrusive thoughts it makes me think of OCD.

Meant to quote this. Something wrong with the quoting system :/

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