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  • Author
Posted
700 miles, and showed up at his workplace.....don't do this in the future. I know you meant well but holy hell!

 

Also don't play games in the future either. If you don't want to look desperate or needy, simply ignore him or give vague bland details if you feel you must contact.

 

 

:( , i would never to do that again since i no longer want to pursue such guy.

  • Author
Posted
That's like Fatal Attraction-stalker behavior. Never do that again. You probably scared the crap out of him.

 

lol i did scare the crap out of him. I could see that , he also told me that" this is the worst thing you ever did , you disappointed me big time. Never ever do that again." Holy Jesus, why you all cant see my good intentions behind it ? And any ways , i will never do it again as i no longer want to pursue such guy.

  • Author
Posted
I said to myself many times that never initiate anything with him yet there are some days i just cannot control myself..i really dont know why..

girl Im afraid one day you just wanna talk to him one more time..

 

Well may be it's BIG deal but you know what i followed my heart. No matter whatever was result , i am glad i tried everything to make it work. I will have no regret in life. i actually wrote email to him since he wasnt listening in person , told me everything i would ever wanted to say ( as it was my last chance). Feel relieved i conveyed my message . Can move on from now.

  • Author
Posted
It was indeed the worst decision, but you know what it's fine, it's over.

Since you now know he had completely make it clear to you, it's time to spend quality time with yourself.

 

Yep you are right. No matter whatever was result i am glad i followed my heart and did everything . Now i can easily move on with my life with peace of mind . Its time to take care of myself .Luckily , got good roommates who supports me . The quote that you have put here is so true.

Posted
:( , i would never to do that again since i no longer want to pursue such guy.

 

Don't do it with any guy in the future. Driving 700 miles and then showing up unannounced? No bells were ringing in your head that it was a bad idea, not even when you were driving for hours up there? Seems to me that you could possibly react this way in the future when you're feeling vulnerable and desperate.

 

Check that and make sure next time, at any time, you don't impulsively react to such levels.

  • Like 2
Posted

"Love" can make us do pretty ridiculous things yes?Take this as a learning experience and always hold yourself at high regards. Internalize what occurred and understand that there is no turning back and that therelationship has ran its course and it's time to recover and heal. You attempted to give it one last shot but reality is that the relationship was over long ago. Be gentle and don't make abrupt or premature decision. Always think things through and know that you are the only person that matters from this point forward.

  • Like 2
Posted

Wow! Sounds sorta like my situation. He moved after our BU back to his home state. I drove 1,000 miles (12 hours) . While I was driving I thought about what could happen and was prepared for the rejection of him not wanting to see me. But the way I saw it was that I at least did everything possible to save us. He met up with me and we had an awkward/good day. He spent the night with me but made it clear that he was confused and didnt wish to fix things with us. He still told me he loved me and that he did miss me. Go NC and just lick your wounds. I'm doing that now. 3 months since I saw him and havent heard a word from him. We just gotta let them go.

  • Like 1
Posted

Come on guys, give her a break, its not like she killed anyone. She did it for herself, not him. Sometimes you need to move on knowing you went above and beyond and did all you can.

 

I drove to my ex's house three times to see her. The first time she wouldnt want to come out but I convinced her to open the door and come talk to me....The second time she wasnt there and the third time she wouldnt even want to come out and see me.

 

She said my actions made her dislike me completely...well f her. My intention was in the right place, i wanted to talk to her to see if there is a chance to save anything...she made it clear there isnt so now I can move on and its finally over....nightmare is over.

 

She was crying as she was talking to me on the phone, which I don't understand why and she did say she now knows how much I loved her....and that she doesnt hate me...then she told me to never contact her again or she calls the cops....well good. All I wanted to do was talk to her face to face...no bs anymore...but she's not matured enough to handle that.

 

If I havent done any of that, I wouldnt have known there was another guy that she was talking to before she left me...i wouldnt have known the real reason. I would have just waited thinking there is a chance but now I know there isnt. Thats true peace.

 

Sometimes in life you need to take risks and there is nothing wrong with trying and failing.

  • Author
Posted
Come on guys, give her a break, its not like she killed anyone. She did it for herself, not him. Sometimes you need to move on knowing you went above and beyond and did all you can.

 

I drove to my ex's house three times to see her. The first time she wouldnt want to come out but I convinced her to open the door and come talk to me....The second time she wasnt there and the third time she wouldnt even want to come out and see me.

 

She said my actions made her dislike me completely...well f her. My intention was in the right place, i wanted to talk to her to see if there is a chance to save anything...she made it clear there isnt so now I can move on and its finally over....nightmare is over.

 

She was crying as she was talking to me on the phone, which I don't understand why and she did say she now knows how much I loved her....and that she doesnt hate me...then she told me to never contact her again or she calls the cops....well good. All I wanted to do was talk to her face to face...no bs anymore...but she's not matured enough to handle that.

 

If I havent done any of that, I wouldnt have known there was another guy that she was talking to before she left me...i wouldnt have known the real reason. I would have just waited thinking there is a chance but now I know there isnt. Thats true peace.

 

Sometimes in life you need to take risks and there is nothing wrong with trying and failing.

 

Thanks for understanding.. Its atleast good that in your case somewhere she understood you and spoke to you. In my case , he disrespected me and ignored my messages and calls. He emailed me saying " leave me alone , dont ever contact me back" such a jerk! I did all for my ownself so i wont regret in future for not doing anything..

  • Author
Posted
Wow! Sounds sorta like my situation. He moved after our BU back to his home state. I drove 1,000 miles (12 hours) . While I was driving I thought about what could happen and was prepared for the rejection of him not wanting to see me. But the way I saw it was that I at least did everything possible to save us. He met up with me and we had an awkward/good day. He spent the night with me but made it clear that he was confused and didnt wish to fix things with us. He still told me he loved me and that he did miss me. Go NC and just lick your wounds. I'm doing that now. 3 months since I saw him and havent heard a word from him. We just gotta let them go.

 

Wow its nice of him that he actually met up with you. He atleast understood that you drove all this long way. My stupid Ex didnt even care about it, started insulting me . He even ignored my calls , messages after that. He replied to my email saying that leave him alone and never contact him back again ..

Posted
lol i did scare the crap out of him. I could see that , he also told me that" this is the worst thing you ever did , you disappointed me big time. Never ever do that again." Holy Jesus, why you all cant see my good intentions behind it ? And any ways , i will never do it again as i no longer want to pursue such guy.

 

Why can't you see how inappropriate it was?

  • Like 4
  • Author
Posted
Why can't you see how inappropriate it was?

 

It was only way to reach out to him. Anyways , it's done and gone!

Posted
It was only way to reach out to him. Anyways , it's done and gone!

 

Phone, email or text?

  • Like 1
Posted (edited)

Haha that is a great story youll never ever forget!!! You can tell your grandkids this one!!

 

At least you went BIG on breaking NC!! Rock on! Cav

 

How was the drive back????

Edited by cavalier99
  • Like 2
  • Author
Posted
Phone, email or text?

 

Tried all options.

Posted
Haha that is a great story youll never ever forget!!! You can tell your grandkids this one!!

 

At least you went BIG on breaking NC!! Rock on! Cav

 

How was the drive back????

 

Talk about determination huh?

You can only laugh it off and learn from it.

  • Author
Posted
Haha that is a great story youll never ever forget!!! You can tell your grandkids this one!!

 

At least you went BIG on breaking NC!! Rock on! Cav

 

How was the drive back????

 

It isn't funny. People do lot of crazy things in love, thats what i did. I am just waiting for time when i will be laughing out loud on my ex. Karma is bitch and time repays everything.

Posted
It isn't funny. People do lot of crazy things in love, thats what i did. I am just waiting for time when i will be laughing out loud on my ex. Karma is bitch and time repays everything.

 

But is is funny!

 

You will see this one day and will laugh about it. That is the beauty of recovering. You actually did yourself a favor breaking NC this way. Im sure youll be super reslolute about staying NC. It gets better i swear. Cav

  • Like 1
Posted
It isn't funny. People do lot of crazy things in love, thats what i did. I am just waiting for time when i will be laughing out loud on my ex. Karma is bitch and time repays everything.

 

We aren't poking fun at it in any way trust me. If you only knew all the stupidity I did post break up you can't help but to laugh at it all eventually. In time the pain will subside as you will see that the "crazy" things we did to availed to nothing were only learning experiences that helped us propelled toward recovery.

  • Like 3
Posted
Tried all options.

 

So you tried all options, phone, text and email and nothing was working in your favor.

 

That was your answer. It was time to let go. Not try harder.

  • Like 2
Posted

All these thing that get posted here really arnt such a big deal in the long run.

 

We all eventually laugh about how we were post BU. Me too.

 

Imagine we were (or are) all scared of a simple, text, or a phone call, or a Bday. It is all quite silly. We need to be like this post BU to recover but you need to know that all this stuff is truly so trivial. what else can we do but laugh.

 

I knew this even in the midst of the worst part of my most recent BU. Be happy!! Cav

  • Like 2
  • Author
Posted
So you tried all options, phone, text and email and nothing was working in your favor.

 

That was your answer. It was time to let go. Not try harder.

 

 

Well , it's complicated story. But anyways , it's gone now!

  • Like 1
Posted
Tried all options.

 

And you couldn't take the hint that maybe you should back off? I mean, what's done is done, but the fact that you still think this was a good idea is pretty concerning. This is absolutely something you should never do again. You shouldn't be justifying it.

  • Author
Posted
All these thing that get posted here really arnt such a big deal in the long run.

 

We all eventually laugh about how we were post BU. Me too.

 

Imagine we were (or are) all scared of a simple, text, or a phone call, or a Bday. It is all quite silly. We need to be like this post BU to recover but you need to know that all this stuff is truly so trivial. what else can we do but laugh.

 

I knew this even in the midst of the worst part of my most recent BU. Be happy!! Cav

 

Yeah , may be in future i will laugh on what i did. As for right now, i am just crying , kind of feel like i can never fall in love again. Have no faith in it , just be forever alone..

Posted
Yeah , may be in future i will laugh on what i did. As for right now, i am just crying , kind of feel like i can never fall in love again. Have no faith in it , just be forever alone..

 

Sorry gal. I was were you were 1 year ago. Now im perfectly fine and in a new RS.

 

Youll get thru it. Just cry and get it all out. Cry every day if you need to then. STOP. get up and brush yourself off. Rock on! Cav

 

PS this was me last Nov might give you some perspective.

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/357332-friggin-fed-up-sick-tired-recovery

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