hippetyhop Posted October 14, 2013 Posted October 14, 2013 I'm thrilled for her; I really am (I'm not jealous either that she's getting married as I'm not exactly a fan of her fiance (he's very egotistic and a whiner)) --but when people are planning a wedding, do they forget there are other things to talk about?! My best friend got engaged about 3 weeks ago, and today was the first time she asked how I've been (we talk every day)-- and it was when she was getting into work and followed up by a quick "Okay--I'll talk to you later". I know she needs my support, etc. but I find myself not wanting to even talk to her or do any of this stuff. I particularly don't care for weddings myself, so that probably has something to do with it. I don't know how much of this I can handle for the next 11 months!
stillafool Posted October 14, 2013 Posted October 14, 2013 This is one of the most important times in her life and she is excited. If you really are the type who hates weddings let her know up front before she picks you to be a maid of honor or bridesmaid. Free her up to ask her other friends who love being involved in the planning of a wedding. It's important to let her know early you do not want to be involved so she won't be disappointed later. You have every right to feel the way you do about weddings.
learman3 Posted October 14, 2013 Posted October 14, 2013 I agree with stillafool. I think it is even harder for you knowing how you feel about her fiance. Unfortunately we can not choose who people fall in love with. Just try and support her the best way you know how. Best friends are hard to find.
Author hippetyhop Posted October 14, 2013 Author Posted October 14, 2013 Thanks for the replies and support She already asked me to be a bridesmaid, and I feel obligated to take the roll. The fact is, she doesn't have any other close friends. The other bridesmaids are her sisters. I'm trying to be very supportive of her as I know how much this means to her. Their wedding will consist of 30 guests and are having a hard time planning for such a small occasion. I don't want to offend her, but unlike everyone whose telling her she has to pay top dollar for an awesome dj, photographer, etc. I'm playing devil's advocate to have her see the other side. I don't want to be a "Debbie Downer" but--they're paying out of pocket for this event, and she's trying to have a champagne wedding on a beer budget. I told her that we all know they're paying out of pocket, and there are 30 people there who love and support them--we aren't there to judge or criticize if they don't do some of the normal wedding events. I even suggested instead of having a grandstand affair to have a nice simple ceremony followed by a sit down dinner at a nice restaurant as opposed to a party. I tried letting her know why start a marriage with wedding debt. All these things I say to her goes in one ear and out the other. It is quite frustrating when I'm giving her suggestions but she insists on paying a high cost for dj, etc. and then hearing her complain about it. Here I am complaining of her complaining.
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