mfleck91 Posted October 13, 2013 Posted October 13, 2013 So it's been a really long time since I was here. I have been with my current girlfriend for 3 months after being single for 6 months after my breakup with my ex of over 4 years.... Don't get me wrong, I'm incredibly happy with my current gf, she's lovely in every way. The issue is lately my ex has been wandering back into my mind. I wonder what she is doing, who she is with, what it would be like if we were together. Now I don't go into deep thinking on these emotions, I just let them pass and I know I would never get back with my ex under any circumstance. Still though, it bothers me. Should I be worried? Is this normal and should I tell my current gf about these random emotions? On an unrelated note the only thing I'm having a hard time accepting about my current gf is her sexual history. I'm the 6th guy she has been with an she is only 21. She is my 3rd. It seems like she had 2 bags who she slept with pretty quickly (within a couple weeks), but she has also hooked up with 3 guys in the past in a span on 2 weeks. I know she isn't that same girl now and that she is completely faithful to me. I do have a hard time understanding why she did the things she did though. I also know one of the guys who she hooked up with who was a huge dick, but she slept with him anyways. It's just difficult for me to grasp why she would give these jerks what they wanted. Any advice would be appreciated.
Omei Posted October 13, 2013 Posted October 13, 2013 If she was single and wanted to get her rocks off power to her, shes faithful and shes with you now obessing about her last sexual history will do nothing at all for you. You have a score board in your head, stop it. 1
esteem-jam Posted October 13, 2013 Posted October 13, 2013 Your feelings are completely legit. Could be retroactive jealousy, or not. I understand you are primarily concerned with the quality, not quantity. Maybe you have different views about what is good and bad (jerk or a decent fella ) Maybe you are worried that in case she leaves you, the next guy could possibly be a jerk, he will be a jerk to you and so will be she (being mean). And you can look at this so - the more guys a girl has seen, the higher the chances one of them was a jerk. You were merely hit by the statistics. If somebody being a jerk is 50%, then 5 x 50 % (its amateurish math actually, dont do this).
Author mfleck91 Posted October 13, 2013 Author Posted October 13, 2013 Thanks guys, but I really am more concerned about the thoughts of my ex more than my current gfs sexual past.
Omei Posted October 13, 2013 Posted October 13, 2013 Thanks guys, but I really am more concerned about the thoughts of my ex more than my current gfs sexual past. Dont tell your gf about the thoughts she need not know they're normal everyone wonders about the ex even your gf its something ppl dont share because its harmless and not all too importaint to the relationship we all have our secret thoughts. 1
Mr Scorpio Posted October 14, 2013 Posted October 14, 2013 In no way should you tell your current GF about the thoughts you are having. You are already experiencing some degree of pain over somewhat unnecessary transparency as it relates to her sexual history. There is no need for her to experience pain as well. Such a relevation also might begin the end of your relationship.
mea_M Posted October 15, 2013 Posted October 15, 2013 Hi. You shared a bit of history and a piece of your heart with your ex. Totally normal to perhaps always think of her. Just lock that up and keep it in your heart in a safe place as a special memory. Now, as for the new GF and past guys, forget about the men before you. She is with you now by choice. Let it flow and enjoy one another. You may need to change your thought process here a bit. Good luck. Mea:)
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