swordsmen121 Posted October 12, 2013 Posted October 12, 2013 I was in an online relationship with a girl for 3 years. I mean she was everything I wanted we video chatted and everything too. And yes she was no catfish I knew the person completely both physically and emotionally and I know she was authentic. At one point we wanted to marry each other. But due to some circumstances on my part I wasn't ready. Its mainly due to financial and academic reasons. We called it off. Now she is interested in someone else. And I support her to be with him in everyway. However, now she mentioned it clearly that when she gets married to him she will stop talking to me completely. And that the only reason shes talking to me right now is because she wants to make it easy on me. She's not interested in being my friend when she settles down. At this point I feel like its completely one sided. I mean I chose to see her as a close friend now despite everything and I would still want to know her strictly as friends. I feel like its completely one sided on my part and that she doesn't feel the same about me or would want to have me around in any way whatsoever. At this point I'm wondering if I should just stop talking to her completely. I don't want people to be around just cuz of my feelings or 'want to make it easy on me'. I can handle on my own. For her sakes I think its best I should stop talking to her so she can get to bond with this guy completely. Is that a good decision? I would be interested in being her friend but shes made it clear that I won't exist down the road because she wants to be 'loyal' to her new love.
emi Posted October 13, 2013 Posted October 13, 2013 have u ever met? And its true that she can do whatever she want when she is out of the relationship with you. You got no other choice than move on and respect whatever her decision is
coolheadal Posted October 13, 2013 Posted October 13, 2013 Your intent was to call off the communications so no marriage or etc. She has moved on with her intent now to get married to someone else. She letting you down easy. But still you need to pull in your gut and drop this communication with her completely. Just end up feeling real sad and low because your intent was to stay friends but she has told you she will not communicate no longer with you once she gets married. Of course she's being a bit cold to you about this. Sounds like she found what she wants and not with you. So now you have to respect her wishes and drop the talking to her again. I would do this right now and move on to someone else who will enjoy your company is what you need.
nomadic_butterfly Posted November 17, 2013 Posted November 17, 2013 I was in an online relationship with a girl for 3 years. I mean she was everything I wanted we video chatted and everything too. And yes she was no catfish I knew the person completely both physically and emotionally and I know she was authentic. At one point we wanted to marry each other. But due to some circumstances on my part I wasn't ready. Its mainly due to financial and academic reasons. We called it off. Now she is interested in someone else. And I support her to be with him in everyway. However, now she mentioned it clearly that when she gets married to him she will stop talking to me completely. And that the only reason shes talking to me right now is because she wants to make it easy on me. She's not interested in being my friend when she settles down. At this point I feel like its completely one sided. I mean I chose to see her as a close friend now despite everything and I would still want to know her strictly as friends. I feel like its completely one sided on my part and that she doesn't feel the same about me or would want to have me around in any way whatsoever. At this point I'm wondering if I should just stop talking to her completely. I don't want people to be around just cuz of my feelings or 'want to make it easy on me'. I can handle on my own. For her sakes I think its best I should stop talking to her so she can get to bond with this guy completely. Is that a good decision? I would be interested in being her friend but shes made it clear that I won't exist down the road because she wants to be 'loyal' to her new love. Your feelings were very real but your relationship never materialized into real life so that WASN'T REAL. Echo her sentiments and come off the computer and into the REAL WORLD and meet REAL PEOPLE. How long was she suppose to have "computer love?" To be honest I mainly see teens/very young adults and people with mental/emotional/social problems drag out an "online relationship" for extended periods of time. People grow up and come to their senses. For three years you never ever touched, kissed, went out, met each other's families, held hands, and a million other things people do in a REAL RELATIONSHIP. I don't see an issue with starting to get to know someone online, but after 2, 3 yrs and no one has taken initiative the "emotional bond" and "feelings" are real but the relationship is not authentic. I hope you are super young because it would be quite sad if you were an able bodied adult. Go out there and meet some real women! All the best!
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