lakerman34 Posted October 12, 2013 Posted October 12, 2013 (edited) Nothing REALLY has happened yet, so I'm going to speak hypothetically. For all of you keeping up, I REALLY liked this girl. A lot. We were talking from December-February last year, everyday all day, sometimes until 5 AM. 3 days before I went to Cape Town for 4 months, I went to her room on a "date." We hooked up. I realized I was a one night stand, but we spoke about possible relationship. She said not while I was in Cape Town, to go, have fun, and we'll see when I get back. As soon as I get to Cape Town, she messages me and talks to me. Then, it seems as if she started drifting away from me. I got nervous. Did some stupid ****. She messages me one day and says "I don't want a relationship with you, I do enjoy talking to you, but we're incompatible and I can't see it working." We go about 6 months of no talking. I notice she starts Favoriting things on my Twitter, and even tried to start an argument w/ me once or twice (she and I always debate....kind of the main premiss of our "relationship"). For those 6 months, I couldn't stop thinking about her, but I NC'ed her. Hard. She started liking another guy (doesn't anymore -- he wasn't interested. All indicators say she's moved on). Then, I go visit my school, see her, she's drunk, acts kind of snarky to me. Next day, I get a message with her apologizing. I told her it was fine, enjoy her life, whatever. We start talking. Then, we start having conversations, they seem 'just friends' like. Then, I ask to hang out w/ her. She says "I don't think so." Then "fine." But she NEVER gives me any dates. Finally, I ask her to a haunted house. She says 'yes.' That's happening on Friday (even told her earlier today I got tickets and she made fun of me saying that I was going to shriek like a girl). I'm excited to go with her, but now she's acting, I guess, easier? She sends me links of her favorite songs, articles she reads, she's joking around w/ me more, even more so than before we hooked up. I also notice sometimes she says "oh I was doing this and that with my best friend (friend A)." And then the same thing with another best friend. She's starting to tell me some of her closest friends' names, even though I don't know these girls. I don't know if this means anything and I'm over-analyzing, but it almost makes me think she's "preparing" me to become a part of her social circle as something more than "just friends." (Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong -- can't find literature on girls revealing their best friends' names in casual conversation). I told her how, for my birthday, I got my first professional massage and hated it. She told me she was jealous b/c she has an 'old woman's skeleton.' I told her I'd be willing to show her some yoga moves, and she's down. Part of the reason we didn't work out in the first place is because we are both a part of another forum, like this one. I didn't think she'd stalk me, she did, and I wrote some things about her (how I didn't understand her flaking, why she wasn't talking to me as much, that kind of thing). Now, I'm stalking her, and it seems like she's sort of talking about ME in a roundabout way. Describing the kind of guy she likes, she describes me. She has frequented threads I've written on. Stuff like that. Now, she may just be warming up to me as "just a friend," but she was already naked on top of me (I rejected her, telling her that history shows when I have sex too fast with a girl, it doesn't work out). I think we're heading down the road of sex again next Friday. I'm starting to second-guess everything, in terms of how much I like her. Thinks I thought were cute now I see kind of as immature, some of her physical features I'm starting to see as less attractive. I don't know what it is, it's as if now that (I think) I've got her, I no longer want her. Before, it was 90% me chasing, 10% her chasing, and although it drove me crazy, it felt more natural. Now, it's closer to 50/50, but I think she's being more obvious. I don't know. I don't like it. Part of me wants this to be a "just friends" outing, and part of me wants to see where it goes. I just don't know if I see her as long-term material anymore. Before, I thought I've never met a girl more compatible with me than her (and still kind of do -- it's just that I am starting to feel as if she's really young now, although she's only 17 months younger than me). Thoughts? Edited October 12, 2013 by lakerman34
WhiteTan Posted October 13, 2013 Posted October 13, 2013 It sounds like she's open to having sex with you but that's as far as it's ever gonna go. She has made it very clear that she feels you would be incompatible as a couple. There's obviously mutual sexual attraction so she flirts but nothing in your post suggests her changing her mind regarding your lack of compatibility. You may feel her posts on that forum are describing you but that doesn't mean she perceives you in the same way. If she wanted to be together, she would have made it known because she already knows you're interested. If you wanna get laid, it sounds like you have options but if you're looking for love, you might be barking at the wrong tree.
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