Tk123 Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 Hey there. I was hoping to get some advice with the situation I am currently in. So me and this girl are both in college. Since we are both pursuing the same major, we are in a couple of the same classes together. Occasionally, we will hang out after class for a tiny bit. We always enjoy each others presence and get along great. Recently, I was thinking about asking her out until in one of our conversations she mentioned her boyfriend. I know the guy she is dating and he's a good guy. They live together off campus, and I don't want to come in between any of that. However, I would be lying if I said that I didn't have any interest in this girl. We always make each other laugh and we have had some good times together. I just need some thoughts on what to do in this whole situation. I do not believe in cheating, and would never come between a man and his woman. Basically, do I keep things as they are and remain friends with her with the chance of her breaking up with this guy down the road? I really want to hang with this girl outside of school however, I feel like it would be a little strange to ask her out to a movie or something with her having a boyfriend. Any tips or advice is greatly appreciated. Thanks!
veggirl Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 eh maybe you should ask her to the movies to see what kind of character she has. a loyal girl looking to protect/nurture her relationship would tell you no. a girl that will tell you yes in this situation is a girl you shouldn't want to date anyway! if she tells you no, keep on as school-friends and see what happens. though lets be honest, a relationship in college where they are living together? it'll take a LOT of drama for that to end, neither is likely self-sufficient enough to move out! and you will have to allow for grieving time and all that, and then considering she is in college & in a serious relationship, if it ends she will likely want to be single for a long time and see what she missed............so hmm on 2nd thought, i think it's kinda hopeless regardless, sorry.
c57dood Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 Let this be a lesson to you: ask her as soon as possible if she has a boyfriend/fiance/husband/significant other. There's nothing worse than getting into a girl and then all of a sudden she drops the bomb.
The dot Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 I'd say the OP is wasting his time if he wants/expects anything more than a platonic friendship. If this woman was really interested in him in that way, she would have called it quits with her boyfriend by now. She hasn't done this and only sees him on campus. There's your answer. Even if she does break up with her bf down the track, she'll still only see the OP as a friend. The OP is better off simply accepting the benefits of friendship for as long as they last*, and looking for someone else for a relationship. * These friendships usually don't last forever anyway. If the OP gets too close, the bf will simply confront the girl and ask her "who's this guy who keeps calling? Doesn't he know you have a boyfriend?". That will probably be the end of the friendship. Yes, I realise there are probably one or two exceptions to that rule out there, but generally, that's how it goes down. 1
Author Tk123 Posted October 12, 2013 Author Posted October 12, 2013 Thank you all for the responses. I've definitely realized the mistake I made and won't be getting so invested next time. 1
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