confused1345 Posted October 9, 2013 Posted October 9, 2013 I've been with my bf for almost 2 years now and Over the past few months I’ve realized that we are too different. I’ve noticed it in the past, but I guess I just wanted to ignore it before. I’ve gotten to a point where I believe we are just too different to be together for a long time. I’m struggling with how to talk to him about it because I know he will be upset. We also live together and work together. I own the one bedroom condo so he would have to be the one to move. I’ve mentioned it in the past that maybe were too different and hes always said we’d work on it. I just feel that you can’t expected the other person to change in a relationship especially at this age because you are who you are. I want him to be with someone who likes the same things as him and believes the same things. Just like I want to be with someone who enjoys the same things and believes the same way I do. I know relationships will have their differences, but I just feel like the only thing we really have in common is finding new tv shows to watch. I don’t know what to do. His birthday is coming up and I don’t want to do it before then. Hes also not from this state and has always mentioned that he would move back home if we ever broke up, i know i shouldn't care but I think that would be a bad idea since he has such a good job here. This is another reason i've delayed the breakup. I just don't know how to handle the situation and when to do it with his birthday coming up and needed any advice i can get from someone whos been in a similar situation. Thank you in advance.
headinthecloud Posted October 9, 2013 Posted October 9, 2013 Im sorry that you're feeling this way, it's a very mature approach you're taking and thoughtful which shows that you're a good person. Wait until a week after his birthday, if you can. In the meantime, try spending your time working out and bettering yourself so that your thoughts don't continually stray to the negative. Prepare yourself for the pain that will come about when you do have the talk and go NC immediately after so as not to string him along and give him hope. It might be good to ask a friend for the option to stay with them for a couple days after to give each other space, even though it's your place. Just in case. Also, try to plan the talk for a Thursday or Friday night so as to give them the weekend to deal with the pain to minimize impact on his work. I wish you the best.
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