FitChick Posted October 8, 2013 Share Posted October 8, 2013 This was a first for me: Hello from Scotland! I've been reading your profile and follow the flow of your thoughts. I'm sensitive to what people say and think. (Obviously not since I don’t like 65-year old bald men with beards). …here's a poem I wrote some years ago. The last two lines of each verse should be indented and in italics. In the House of the Healer I had a lot of things to do, there wasn’t time to stay, But the sunshine through the windows was as bright and fresh as May, And at times I would remember there were things I had to say. Heather in the windowbox, roses in their beds, While out upon the winter reefs the breakers rear their heads. Foxglove and marigold, the flowers are all aglow. The forest trees are swaying with a wind from long ago. And far on the horizon is the light on mountain snow. Ragtime and suppertime, buttercup and bone, The storm clouds are gathering, and winter’s coming on. In a warm and sunny corner there’s a time for sitting still And dreaming of a castle in the woodland on the hill And the sound of distant music, though the air is growing chill. Mount High, Weathertop! The eagles, soaring, know That soon they’ll see the marching of the armies in the snow. There’s butter in the bank account, and ferrets in the fax, And a fishing-net of sunbeams to be sent away in tax, And an algebraic recipe, in minimum and max. Herb tea with lemon juice, soda in the scone, And somewhere in the summertime a war is going on. The water in the millstream makes its journey to the sea, From meadow-grass and rush-pool and the stone dyke in the lee, To waving wrack and storm-beach and a world of what will be. Kingcup and watercress, rippling by the mill, The flooded lands are back again, and rain is on the hill. Uhhh... er.... not sure what to say. I did like this bit: There’s butter in the bank account, and ferrets in the fax, And a fishing-net of sunbeams to be sent away in tax, And an algebraic recipe, in minimum and max. Herb tea with lemon juice, soda in the scone, And somewhere in the summertime a war is going on. Sounds like the lost verse from Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds. Link to post Share on other sites
Mascara Posted October 8, 2013 Share Posted October 8, 2013 Sounds like the free form ramblings of someone who's waiting for matron to do the rounds. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
soccerrprp Posted October 8, 2013 Share Posted October 8, 2013 My gf received two from me over the summer! Whoo hoo! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mascara Posted October 8, 2013 Share Posted October 8, 2013 Were they about a man from Nantucket? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
MrCastle Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 I have written poems before, but I have never gotten a poem from a man 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 Yes, but not from OLD men. Link to post Share on other sites
Phoe Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 One of my ex's wrote me a poem as a valentines gift. I thought it was very sweet. Link to post Share on other sites
Grumpybutfun Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 This was a first for me: Hello from Scotland! I've been reading your profile and follow the flow of your thoughts. I'm sensitive to what people say and think. (Obviously not since I don’t like 65-year old bald men with beards). …here's a poem I wrote some years ago. The last two lines of each verse should be indented and in italics. In the House of the Healer I had a lot of things to do, there wasn’t time to stay, But the sunshine through the windows was as bright and fresh as May, And at times I would remember there were things I had to say. Heather in the windowbox, roses in their beds, While out upon the winter reefs the breakers rear their heads. Foxglove and marigold, the flowers are all aglow. The forest trees are swaying with a wind from long ago. And far on the horizon is the light on mountain snow. Ragtime and suppertime, buttercup and bone, The storm clouds are gathering, and winter’s coming on. In a warm and sunny corner there’s a time for sitting still And dreaming of a castle in the woodland on the hill And the sound of distant music, though the air is growing chill. Mount High, Weathertop! The eagles, soaring, know That soon they’ll see the marching of the armies in the snow. There’s butter in the bank account, and ferrets in the fax, And a fishing-net of sunbeams to be sent away in tax, And an algebraic recipe, in minimum and max. Herb tea with lemon juice, soda in the scone, And somewhere in the summertime a war is going on. The water in the millstream makes its journey to the sea, From meadow-grass and rush-pool and the stone dyke in the lee, To waving wrack and storm-beach and a world of what will be. Kingcup and watercress, rippling by the mill, The flooded lands are back again, and rain is on the hill. Uhhh... er.... not sure what to say. I did like this bit: There’s butter in the bank account, and ferrets in the fax, And a fishing-net of sunbeams to be sent away in tax, And an algebraic recipe, in minimum and max. Herb tea with lemon juice, soda in the scone, And somewhere in the summertime a war is going on. Sounds like the lost verse from Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds. FitChick: Thanks. Best post of the day. I haven't laughed this hard in a long time. Wordsworth meets Longfellow meets Whitman meets match.com...wow. You know you have to give him a shot now...I mean, this is epic! G Link to post Share on other sites
ThomasD Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 (edited) Uhhh... er.... not sure what to say. I did like this bit: There’s butter in the bank account, and ferrets in the fax, And a fishing-net of sunbeams to be sent away in tax, And an algebraic recipe, in minimum and max. Herb tea with lemon juice, soda in the scone, And somewhere in the summertime a war is going on. Sounds like the lost verse from Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds. Well, it's almost to the point where only 65-year olds know much about "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds". Seed a search engine with a few of the unique phrases and try to decide if it's the guy's original work or not. (Keep in mind that just finding pieces of it posted to various web pages doesn't mean it's NOT original.) If it seems to be original, I'd take it at face value. The originator is a person with a somewhat intellectual personality, and an artistic or literary bent. My impression is that even among "professional" poets, poetry tends to be rather personal - more so than creative prose writing - so this author may be revealing something of himself to you that isn't shared with people around him. It may feel uncomfortable to you, but it's almost certainly an honor extended out of respect. (I never set out to compose any piece of poetry, but my wife claims that some of the things I wrote to her in the months before we actually met are rather poetic. ) I'm certainly unqualified to judge either composition, content, or meaning of this piece. (My academic record would be significantly more impressive if I omitted the grades from English and Literature classes. I probably couldn't offer the following comments if I hadn't spent all evening listening to the Stan Rogers Playlist on Youtube ) I suspect the imagery originates from the Scottish countryside. The contrast of the last line in each stanza, in light of the previous lines, is a little unsettling and disturbing, and probably a very significant clue to the author's intended message. Edited October 9, 2013 by ThomasD Link to post Share on other sites
Lansing Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 I remember coming across a poem I wrote in high school and sending it to a GF years later just because I found it interesting. I think she kind of got creeped out by it. Ha. I don't even remember what it was about but I think she was wondering why I was sending it to her and what relevance it had to our relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
GorillaTheater Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 I have written poems before, but I have never gotten a poem from a man What can be finer Than a woman's stunning ass Rosy in morning light? Happy to pop your cherry, man. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
soccerrprp Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 Yes, but not from OLD men. Not certain what OLD has anything to do with it, but I am an exclusive OLD "MAN" and send poems to my gf. Link to post Share on other sites
AMusing Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 I got a poem from an ex boyfriend about 2 months after we broke up. He wrote it on a napkin and left it--along with a milkshake--on the hood of my car for me to find after work. It was so bad it almost broke my heart. It started with something like "My name is 'X' and I so sad//Being with you would make me glad." I don't remember much of the rest of it, except for the last two lines: "Here is a milkshake//Will you make my heart quake?" I did get a poem from another guy once, a very nicely written one. Wish I'd kept it. Link to post Share on other sites
soccerrprp Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 This thread got me thinking that as men are the ones who are expected to pursue, how wonder how many guys have received a poem from a gf? That's for another post... I got one from my gf last week!!!!!!!!!!!! Whoo hoo! Sorry, don't mean to hijack the thread. Link to post Share on other sites
Lansing Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 Not certain what OLD has anything to do with it, but I am an exclusive OLD "MAN" and send poems to my gf. I think she meant "Online Dating". Even though the guy in this situation was old too. Link to post Share on other sites
soccerrprp Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 I think she meant "Online Dating". Even though the guy in this situation was old too. Hey Lansing, Yes, I know. I was emphasizing the fact that I online date so typed "OLD." Link to post Share on other sites
Author FitChick Posted October 9, 2013 Author Share Posted October 9, 2013 I googled some phrases. Seems to be original. He said he has a new book coming out and has written others. Not sure what the subject matter is. He sounds like he's into some type of transformational therapy. Might be interesting to have as a friend. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 I've only written a few love poems, one sonnet I wrote was published but I have never sent a poem I wrote to anyone in OLD. The few poems I wrote were written for a special person so sharing them with anyone else would be crass. I did some googling as well and the only thing that pops up is this thread, so now he will know your LS ID if he googles a phrase Link to post Share on other sites
GorillaTheater Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 I did some googling as well and the only thing that pops up is this thread, so now he will know your LS ID if he googles a phrase "Goad a'michty! A dinna ken how the wee lass could start so many threads! Yer bum’s oot the windae!" Link to post Share on other sites
Author FitChick Posted October 9, 2013 Author Share Posted October 9, 2013 I did some googling as well and the only thing that pops up is this thread, so now he will know your LS ID if he googles a phrase And the other women he has sent the exact same email to will know. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 And the other women he has sent the exact same email to will know. Excellent point !!! Link to post Share on other sites
WhiteButton Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 I wrote a poem for all Loveshack ladies My flowers are fresh, their stems stand still strong. Their petals gleam red, but time has moved on. The flower have wilted, their scent is all gone. The petals are faded, but my love will live on. Thank you very much! Link to post Share on other sites
Grumpybutfun Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 I googled some phrases. Seems to be original. He said he has a new book coming out and has written others. Not sure what the subject matter is. He sounds like he's into some type of transformational therapy. Might be interesting to have as a friend. FitChick: I thought the poem was great, fun, humorous, and I just assumed he wrote it that way to set himself apart from other OLD men. Nothing is better than humor to break the ice. Transcendentalism is very interesting...which is what I thought when I read it...Emerson/Thoreau. G Link to post Share on other sites
ThomasD Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 . . . Might be interesting to have as a friend. I'd say the same thing, whether it's an opposite-sex or same-sex friendship. Yes, I know you said he's a male guy person of the masculine gender. What I'm trying to get across is this sounds like a person I'd be interested in knowing, quite apart from any potential or actual emotional attachment. And if it becomes an opposite sex more-than-friends relationship, so much the better for you. As implied in some other posts, you may want to feel him out regarding how widely he has distributed this composition. Could be he really did think it was appropriate for you in particular. Could be he's fishing for comments and critique from people he judges are qualified to offer ideas. Could be just his way of saying "Hi" to any female who catches his attention. Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted October 9, 2013 Share Posted October 9, 2013 i write poetry .........and i would give poetry to a man i loved.....i have.....and the only poetry he liked was mine i dont see this poem as romantic..... it is intricate in imagery the phrase turning is spectacular and its a journey poem....true capacity for you to be in the images...to feel the colors.....it has many colors in there...bright and beautiful.....humor thrown in as a back drop..........gorgeous poem......deb 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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