elizabeth21 Posted October 8, 2013 Posted October 8, 2013 (edited) Here it is(sorry it's long): I'm 18 and he's 17. We dated over a year and we broke up in the spring because it just wasn't working I guess. We were each others first. He was too busy for me and he thought I was asking too much of him so he thought I was clingy and what not. When I wasn't at all. We saw each other like once a week and barely texted and just got frustrated a lot. I was trying to be the best gf and did so much for him. He's a laid back person where as I'm outgoing and like to treat my partner nice and take them out. He told me he wasn't "ready" for a relationship and wasn't gonna date again in high school....he went into this long thing saying he shouldn't have gotten in a relationship just because I liked him back...well I'm kinda mad he didn't have the guts to tell me the the truth cause I guess that wasn't the real reasons. His parents even said he wasn't ready for a relationship. Cause he stunk as a bf! As soon as we broke up I lost all feelings for him and only missed what we used to be. We had some of the best times together and had great chemistry. He's now kinda dating this girl who used to be my friend. But she's more of an acquaintance. We stopped talking after she'd flirt with him while I was still dating him and she said she's liked him on and off for 2 years..I just hate how of all the people it had to be her. And he sits in church with her and used to do that with me until he got lazy/too busy. So I'd have to sit alone.. It'd stink if he changed his ways just for her n not me (sitting in church with her, driving out to see her, talking a lot). But maybe that's her type since she's laid back too. Or the real side of him will show. I might've seemed clingy/too demanding to him, but I want to see my bf more than once a week and talk more than a few texts a night. I want my bf to do a little something nice for our 1 year rather than sit on the couch. I don't want to get the left overs of his time and forgotten dates. He shoved me in a wall once. He got angry very easily sometimes...She's 17 so maybe she won't care as much about that like when we first started dating. But eventually I wanted to be treated like a proper older gf. She's never had a bf or anything so he's all amazing to her. Even tho he lied, I honestly don't think he knows what it means to be a bf still. A part of me regrets some things that led us to the break up if I really was "too high maintenance" or "clingy" like he said to his family. Everyone said nothing was wrong with me and I should've let him go awhile ago since he did zero for me and I wore the pants. I feel bad that in his eyes that he thinks I just show love by gifts and want him to show it that way. He is hard to read so I never felt loved and that's why I wanted something done for him to show it..He told this girl that he feels bad that he hurt me...I DON'T want his pity. I should've dumped him long ago n I wish I would've. I wasn't hurt we broke up, I was hurt that I held on for so long for nothing n that he treated me like nothing. I thought we could've worked passed our problems like a real mature couple. I don't want him thinking he's this guy that's so hard to get over.. He's not for me I guess but it still kinda stinks. It's weird she's holding what I used to hold. I feel like I was nothing to him. I feel bad he thinks I'm someone I'm not. I feel bad for not ending it when I should have. Everyone else thought he was jerk at times. He got over me fast it seemed like too. He likes laid back I guess but I don't want him thinking I'm just this prissy girl. I'm not and after this summer I became even more less high maintenance..if that makes sense lol. His true side may show and they may have the same problems or maybe she just has different ways she wants to be treated. Especially being younger. (She said she kinda wants to be treated like a princess) Maybe I was more mature and didn't wanted more than what he could give? He said something like that once...I want my partner to be involved in my life and not just be on the sidelines of his life. I know we wern't perfect for each other but I still really did care for him. I tried to be nice after it but he was just cold to me. I'm even nice to the girl but I'm done talking to her. I deleted him off of facebook last night too. I won't wish bad upon them but I wish he knew what it felt like when the other person doesn't care as much about you. Advice? P.S. We had a argument once where he said he wasn't a romantic guy and may never be one. Cause he never called me and his goodnight tights were just "night". He said he wasn't into texing me saying good morning beautiful or something sweet. Idk if changed over the summer for her..We only talked on the phone when we had problems..He may get used to her and fall back into ways but who knows...I pray God will bless me with a great guy but I just wish I could've said my side of what I didn't like when we broke up..I don't want to be mean but everyone is saying he downgraded and how he could be attracted to her cause she's on the heavier side and dresses in sweats. But he likes that so.. Edited October 8, 2013 by elizabeth21
Beautiful diamond Posted October 8, 2013 Posted October 8, 2013 This happens all the time. At 17 guys just wanna play the field. And trust me he wont stay with the new girl. Try to forget him and learn the lesson. Don't accept any type of treatment to keep someone. If you like a romantic outgoing guy, don't settle for anything less. I wasted 4 years of my life trying to change a guy. Did he change? Yes, for the worse. Next time allow a guy to be a guy. Let him chase you, initiate contact, etc. Don't force a relationship....
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