Rogertown31 Posted October 8, 2013 Posted October 8, 2013 I have a mild case of autism which causes me to be zoned out. I remember in high school I would go an entire class period without saying a word. Everyone would say why doesn't he talk. My nickname was 'The aloof one'. I had few friends in high school and never dated and what is worse I remember some of the prettiest girls in the school saying I was hot but nothing I could do. When I was 19 I learned that the more times I put myself in uncomfortable social situation the better I could handle them. Whenever there was a group of people talking it would make me feel tired and if I said anything it came out wrong. I would drive to different malls and stores, and try and talk to new people. At first, if I met one new person on a Saturday that was a good day. Eventually, I got to the point where I was very out spoken. I had a job as car salesmen, made some good friends. However, I developed a bit of an addictive issue towards dating. I wouldn't date any girl more than twice. I felt that there was always somebody better, and any time I saw an attractive girl I would try and ask her out. There was several times I got numbers from girls who had a bf nearby that's how sick I was. This lasted for about three years. I then was able to relax on the dating ,but I faced an bigger problem. I met a girl who I liked. I had no experience dating anyone that really cared for. We'd go out on a date, have a good time and I would be crying my eyes out afterwards. I couldn't handle it. She gave this speech implying that I was the guy for her and I agreed to only date her. We only dated two months and she broke up with me because I was an absent bf. I took losing her as punishment for dating women who had bfs. After dating so many different women I knew exactly what I wanted and she was it. I had to force myself to start dating again but I probably should've just quit back then. I haven't dated in three years. I'm just starting to get back at it. I know it's going to be difficult. Anyone think that life is too hard?
tinktronik Posted October 8, 2013 Posted October 8, 2013 Hi Roger. My BF was diagnosed (at 49) about a week ago with an autism spectrum disorder. We've been together for 12 years. Are you doing any CBT to deal with some of the associated issues with ASD? I think that life must be difficult for you, probably more difficult that a person without ASD. I know myself and my BF have had many issues through the years, completely different issues than I'd even experienced in a relationship before. It's tough, but after 12 years I'm still doing it and so is he. How's life going for you outside of dating issues?
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