aaron11892 Posted October 7, 2013 Posted October 7, 2013 I got with me ex on 8th March of this year. She was 17 and I was 20. She broke up with me on the 9th September, 1 day after our 6 month anniversary... The beginning of our relationship was amazing, she was always texting me and calling me, would never leave me alone and I loved the affection I was getting from her. It was my first relationship. She always giggled and blushed when she saw me. We've gone away on long weekends together and celebrated our special birthdays together, her 18th and my 21st. She would never stop talking about me and if she was with her friends she would tell me if someone tried hitting on her and told me that she would just talk about me to make him go away and it worked. She was always open with me about everything and I loved everything about the time spent together. However things started to slowly go downhill a month before the break up. She first started to say that I didn't see her enough. I thought 2-3 times a week was enough, she has never complained until then. She used to text me good morning each and every morning without fail and they suddenly stopped. Her calls were less frequent. I had no idea what was happening. I knew in my head she was losing interest and every time i asked her what was wrong she said she was fine. We all know fine never means fine. She was less affectionate towards me and it was me who had to initiate contact towards the end. I could feel her drifting apart each day and it started to annoy me. We ended up having a huge argument at her friends house about a week before the break up because i was telling her she was drifting away and she insisted she wasn't. I ended up telling her she was tapped in the head and she told me thats what her ex used to say aswell and she lost all respect for me after that. I don't think that was the cause of the break up but it might have been the final stepping stone. Like I said, she had been drifting apart a month before this. I was angry because i felt like i was losing her and i should have not let my emotions get the better of me. Anyway the 8th September arrives, our 6 month anniversary. I bought her some roses as a way to say i love her and that i was sorry about what i said the other night. I remember whenever she opened the door to me, her face lit up and she smiled, hugged me and kissed me. This time it was just a hello with literally no expression on her face. However it was like this for the last few weeks. She seemed happy with the roses, and went to show her mum and nan and said that no one had bought her roses before. I thought everything was ok. We visited her sisters house that day and it seemed all good. I drove there with her twin sister. However that night when I dropped her back, we usually kiss and say goodbye. We did, and then say we love each other. We hugged and she said nothing. I usually wait for her to say it but no. I didnt think anything of it and went home. Next day, obviously no good morning as usually, but I was texting her asking how she is and how is work today. All i was getting was one word answers so I text her asking what the hell is wrong with her. She goes she's had enough and saying all we do is argue and then says its for the best we break up. I tried to call but she ignores it an continues to text. I cannot beleive i was dumped over text, I was angry! She said that I smother her and that I don't make enough effort with her! I was always the one going to see her and smothering her is not like me at all. I felt they were excuses. She said she wanted to be on her own and focus on work. I know she enjoyed her work but thats still no excuse to dump me. I went NC for the rest of the day, she had blocked me on facebook, changed her relationship status etc, I was lost. The next day I went to her house to drop her stuff off, she was at work but her sister was there. 2 weeks later, I wrote a handwritten letter to her telling her about the good times we have had together and then said that i know where i stand with her now and was moving on. I don't know if this was the right thing to do. Anyway my friend then says she updated her status saying "Why won't you just leave me alone??" so i take it that letter did more harm than good. Tomorrow will be 2 weeks since she received that letter and I have gone NC since then. I still think about her everyday though. She hasn't once tried to get in touch, i personally think shes met someone else but I'd rather not know. We had such a great relationship the first 5 months, I just don't understand why things started going downhill so fast. She even begged me once to never leave her, her dad had died shortly before I met her and told me she never wanted to lose anyone else. I knew i would never go anywhere. It ends up her leaving me though. Can anyone explain to me why you think she left me? Will she ever come back to me and say she misses me? I want to understand what happened so I can learn from this. She was so in love with me and it just went....
Author aaron11892 Posted October 8, 2013 Author Posted October 8, 2013 Bump. I know it's a long read but please, any advice?
a0009 Posted October 8, 2013 Posted October 8, 2013 Sorry man she is gone and seems she lost interest and you sensed it but you were in some denial and you tried to rescue it, which is good in your part. She left you because she lost interest in you and the love for you had faded. You should not have sent the letter but now you know she does not want you so you need to let her go. The letter did some good to you, because it gave you an insight of what is going on and how much she does not want you. My advice is leave her alone and do not contact her, move on and do not be her friend if she wants to, she dumped you over a text which is disrespectful. She may or may not come back and thats for a different story. All you got to do is heal from the pain, improve your life and be a better person for the next girl. Plus I replied because I was in similar situation in which my ex lost interest and I was dumped afterwards.
Mcscooter Posted October 8, 2013 Posted October 8, 2013 I went through the same exact thing you went through except my was 3 years. She's young she doesn't know what she wants, than again young people in general don't. That is why we explore it's human nature. Girls get bored and sometimes just want to have fun. It's best to let it be. She broke up with you before you noticed it. Probably the moment she stopped texting good morning. She's also acting real immature dealing with the breakup. It's easier to hate someone to get over them. Main point though. You were in a relationsh*t. You put effort in and she stopped. It's not worth it. Big question everyone ask is if the dumper will miss us. In most cases yes because of the good times, but it doesn't mean they want to get back. They choose to hate us because they want to get over us. Get it? This is how it really is though. If you were good in the relationship they will look back and they can't complain that there's no such thing as good guys because they were with one. So as long as you gave it a good shot and it wasn't enough. Save your heart for someone who actually appreciates you. Trust me it feels 100 times better. For now abandon all hope. She is dead to you. When you two meet again and want it to work out. You have to both be completely different. Saying goes. Nothing will ever be the same. So take this break as a life lesson to pick yourself up and make yourself better. Sorry it's long, but hope it helps. My advice.
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