He keeps changing his mind, I don't know. Do I have a second chance?

[autumnsimplified]

My boyfriend (or ex bf) has major issues with his dad and that he constantly nitpicked and judged him. He never told me anything about the nit picking. I nit pick and he pointed it out. I have been reflecting and called a therapist to set up an appointment for next week so I can work on myself.

 

He pointed it out 7 days ago, we had two good days then on Tuesday I said something to challenge him in front of his brother and when we went outside he pointed it out as nit picking (I asked him to point it out so I could know and work on it). I left his home and texted him, got the feeling something was wrong.

 

He said that he did not want to be with me anymore, he was no longer in love with me but he wanted to try to work it out. I agreed, his only complaint was me being nit-picky. When we were talking I guess I did it again and he flipped and totally changed his mind again. Then we talked more and we agreed to work on it and heal our selves and remain friends. He said he loves and cares about me, but I am completely in love with him all I want him to be is happy with or without me. He says he went back into a shell because of old wounds opened when i nit picked. He does not want to lead me on but he wants to try to take it slow be friends and see where it goes.

 

I show I love him everyday I express it and would do anything for him. As a person I am content and my love for him does not come with any obligations I love him for who he is and would not change a thing about him. I only want happiness for him.

 

I went and saw him a few days ago. I just have been being happy and not taking it personally because bad stuff happens but I have to be happy for myself and be healthy. He was confused because I was smiling and upbeat he said it was nice to see me this way because I have not been in a long time. We had a long talk and it was comfortable between us and he kissed me and it felt like something was still there and I asked him he said maybe and that he is just confused.

 

We have gone from hanging out every day for a hour or two to only seeing each other 2 times/week. We are cuddling and smiling, watching movies, going out to dinner and on Friday we went to my friends party at a club and all he kept telling me is that all he wanted was to leave and talk to me and spend time with each other. I keep mentioning a relationship or how he feels and it makes him uncomfortable so I try to stop. He says that those feeling are coming back a little bit. He still calls me baby, babe and sweetie and stuff like this.

 

Its only been a week. I feel like I push him away when I tell him I love him, I know I do. Do I have another chance or shot at this? What should I do? Can he fall back in love with me?

[I-Love-Liberty]

Idk how old you two are, but my first impression is he sounds like a young guy that doesn't know how to completely breakup or just doesn't know what he wants. Nitpicking seems like a pretty easy thing to overcome, if that is the only reason, then I don't see why it couldn't work.

[autumnsimplified]

he is 19, works and goes to school

I am 22 stable career and go to school as well.

[I-Love-Liberty]

So is he maybe conflicted and using the nitpicking as an excuse to be noncommittal? Because I don't see how that could be a deal breaker if it's something you're taking the time to work on.

[autumnsimplified]

He has always expressed his wanting to be with me till we are old and gray, I was pregnant and had a miscarriage the week before this all went down as well. I kept blaming myself and he did not like that, I feel that made him more upset as well. I wanted to talk about it but he just shut me out and moved on with that.

 

Maybe he is not ready to commit I see, but he said he wanted to work on it.

 

He just keeps giving me such mixed messages it is so hard.