Author skela Posted October 10, 2013 Author Posted October 10, 2013 OM. I wasn't even thinking about getting laid so much before this guy. Came along LOL. I'm not that comfortable with dating sites. Seems very creepy. Iv never tried one. I don't need it that badly. And no I'm really not looking for a relationship. Def not yet. Just thought I would do something different and fun. Midlife crisis lol!
Skyraider829 Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 OM. I wasn't even thinking about getting laid so much before this guy. Came along LOL. I'm not that comfortable with dating sites. Seems very creepy. Iv never tried one. I don't need it that badly. And no I'm really not looking for a relationship. Def not yet. Just thought I would do something different and fun. Midlife crisis lol! Online dating seems too much like marketing to me. Marketing belongs to the financial world and not the personal dating world. I second the idea about going to the gym where a bunch of younger guys are. That would be a hot spot. Apart from a possible bed buddy, you could also make a friend if you both enjoy working out.
thefooloftheyear Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 Online dating seems too much like marketing to me. Marketing belongs to the financial world and not the personal dating world. I second the idea about going to the gym where a bunch of younger guys are. That would be a hot spot. Apart from a possible bed buddy, you could also make a friend if you both enjoy working out. No wonder all the younger guys at my gym are a bunch of weenies...They're trying to score when they should be working out......Since when have gyms become meat markets? I guess i never got the memo... OP...I wouldnt take this advice... So you go to the local gym and score with some young guy...Great...When he tells all his jackass buddies, you'll immediately be looked at...well....unfavorably.....At least if you do that, make sure you dont set foot in there again.. .02 TFY
RedRobin Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 No wonder all the younger guys at my gym are a bunch of weenies...They're trying to score when they should be working out......Since when have gyms become meat markets? I guess i never got the memo... OP...I wouldnt take this advice... So you go to the local gym and score with some young guy...Great...When he tells all his jackass buddies, you'll immediately be looked at...well....unfavorably.....At least if you do that, make sure you dont set foot in there again.. .02 TFY OP, .... or his friends will hear how awesome you are, and try to get with you too. Oh sure, they might do a lot of backslapping like "yea, I tapped that"... but when their buddies aren't looking, they'll be trying to get with you too. There is no reason, OP, why you'd need to be ashamed of doing something that the guy did too. One thing I DO find refreshing about modern 20 somethings is that there are much fewer who hold double standards about sex compared to previous generations. Still, there will come a day when you ARE looking for a relationship, and neither men nor women who are looking for a relationship are particularly keen on those who have slept around a lot. That's a pretty common value judgment made amongst all age groups. 1
Emilia Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 Also, he's the one that told me he found me very attractive and was flirting with me as well. If he hadn't given any signals I would never have asked him out. I am almost your age, 41, and have dated younger guys for the last 10 years or so pretty much exclusively. The thing is, they will ask you out and they will suggest places, come up with specific ideas when they are really interested. This guy was maybe after attention or have some girl on the go who had upset him and your emails made him feel better. That doesn't mean he wants to go out. In my experience when a man is reluctant like this, there is something else going on that's stopping him. By all means flirt and look available and chat but let the guy do the asking. 1
Emilia Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 One thing I DO find refreshing about modern 20 somethings is that there are much fewer who hold double standards about sex compared to previous generations. Yes, this is the main attraction.
Mascara Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 Yep, I agree with the above - by all means go for the casual sex thing if that's the stage you're at in life... but don't do it among your circle. Friends, gym buddies, colleagues... it's a no-no. There WILL be a time when you've either got it out of your system, or you want something deeper. That's when it gets awkward. As they say, don't ***** where you eat. 1
Author skela Posted October 11, 2013 Author Posted October 11, 2013 Well, I see one problem. I have a complete home gym so don't go to the gym very often - might have to change that ;-). when I go to the gym I don't get all dressed up - I go in my sweats and work really hard so probably don't look very attractive at that point LOL. Anyway, he did contact me last night with dates, etc. Very apologetic. Made sure I knew he really wanted to get together. I'm taking a step back, listening to the advice I have received here and I'm making him take the lead now. He's doing the reaching out, finalizing the plans and I'm just responding. Just going to let this go where it goes. Hopefully where I want it to ;-)
thefooloftheyear Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 (edited) You can do both. I work out very very hard at times and also socialize I'm willing to bet I have quite a bit more muscular development than you have, no offense Uh guys around 25-30 don't act like 15 year olds I don't understand your advice there at all. Why would the friends of a guy care that a girl went on dates and slept with him? Why is that a bad thing? I'm baffled by your post If I was sleeping with/dating a hot 45 year old fitness model, I can assure you none of my friends would think lesser of her. I don't even understand why that matters in the first place anyways Thats some more bad advice, Skippy. Im 5'6/7 210#...13% BF and 19+" arms...How much do you want to LOSE! Yes, 20 something boys are just that...boys...Judging from your responses to this topic, you are proving my point. There isn't anything patently wrong with what the OP is doing, but I stand by my advice..To troll for young guys for sex at a gym is moronic, quite frankly.. TFY Edited October 11, 2013 by thefooloftheyear
RedRobin Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 To troll for young guys for sex at a gym is moronic, quite frankly.. TFY That's where the boys ARE!! I troll for men where men go. You won't find them in ballet class, which is surprising, considering all of the attractive young ladies who attend AND it is hard as shyte. Although, my version of 'trolling' is likely a lot different than others. Since I'm looking for a relationship, I turn a lot of them down. OTOH, if I were the type to pretend I believe BS that they are interested in a 'relationship' with me... than yea... I could have my calendar full of sex dates with young guys. No problemo. Maybe that's the trick, OP. Just pretend to believe him if/when he says he wants more than just sex. That's what they all say... bless their hearts.
RedRobin Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 I see guys at the gym ranging from 15 to 70 so I don't understand your comment boys, men... humans of the male gender.
Mascara Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 I'm 5 11 230 so not too big of a difference I would absolutely kill to have a hot fitness woman approach me in the gym. I'm just tired of people like you telling women to never initiate anything with men. U need to stop living in 19th century If she only wants sex, absolutely she should approach. If she wants a relationship, I'll be ones of those telling her not to. (Unless she weighs 230lbs, then she should totally hit on you )
thefooloftheyear Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 I'm 5 11 230 so not too big of a difference I would absolutely kill to have a hot fitness woman approach me in the gym. I'm just tired of people like you telling women to never initiate anything with men. U need to stop living in 19th century You didnt list your bf--so it could be a HUGE difference...Im sure you arent showing abs and I dont have a big ass. Nice try, dude.. TFY
thefooloftheyear Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 (edited) That's where the boys ARE!! I troll for men where men go. You won't find them in ballet class, which is surprising, considering all of the attractive young ladies who attend AND it is hard as shyte. Although, my version of 'trolling' is likely a lot different than others. Since I'm looking for a relationship, I turn a lot of them down. OTOH, if I were the type to pretend I believe BS that they are interested in a 'relationship' with me... than yea... I could have my calendar full of sex dates with young guys. No problemo. Maybe that's the trick, OP. Just pretend to believe him if/when he says he wants more than just sex. That's what they all say... bless their hearts. Yawn.... You'd argue with me if I said the sky is blue...... So when am I going to kick your ass?(its an inside joke, people,,dont get crazy).. TFY Edited October 11, 2013 by thefooloftheyear
Skyraider829 Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 Yes, 20 something boys are just that...boys...Judging from your responses to this topic, you are proving my point. That's kind of a broad generalization isn't it? I wouldn't agree. Coming from someone in their twenties, I've seen guys in their sixties that act more immature and boyish than that of a teenager of today.
Skyraider829 Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 Anyway, he did contact me last night with dates, etc. Very apologetic. Made sure I knew he really wanted to get together. I'm taking a step back, listening to the advice I have received here and I'm making him take the lead now. He's doing the reaching out, finalizing the plans and I'm just responding. By all means let him take the lead. He's no kid, he's a man and he knows its up to him to take the initiative. With him contacting you, you can confirm his interest at least and the next step is to meet up and go out.
thefooloftheyear Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 (edited) That's kind of a broad generalization isn't it? I wouldn't agree. Coming from someone in their twenties, I've seen guys in their sixties that act more immature and boyish than that of a teenager of today. Yes it is...its my observation based on more life experience...I moved out of the house at 17, and at 24 owned my own small company, had a mortgage payment and a marriage certificate...Most guys that age today havent made it from their bedroom in their parents house to the basement. Most of my employees are 20 something year old boys..yep...boys.... For guys in 2013, 30 is the new 20..Dont believe me?, ask any woman.. Of course there are exceptions..Ill freely admit things could be different in other parts of the country...but not here.. TFY Edited October 11, 2013 by thefooloftheyear
RedRobin Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 (edited) Yawn.... You'd argue with me if I said the sky is blue...... So when am I going to kick your ass?(its an inside joke, people,,dont get crazy).. TFY Yea, you got my number, ha ha When are you going to kick my ass?? You already are. (IN YOUR DREAMS SUCKA!) ... but seriously... I don't need to kick anyone's ass or vice versa. It just seems that my level of fitness is orders of magnitude greater than most people I know and I'd prefer not to do activities alone... more fun with a companion. None of my outings are competitive. The only person I really push is myself. Hard. Edited October 11, 2013 by RedRobin 1
deathandtaxes Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 I troll for men where men go. You won't find them in ballet class, which is surprising, considering all of the attractive young ladies who attend AND it is hard as shyte. Love this!! I have taken some adult ballet classes. Usually I was one of two guys in the class. And the other guy may have been gay. And surrounded by 10-15 women. OMG is it hard. 1
RedRobin Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 ^^ Yea, ballet is one of the few physical activities where you suffer and aren't allowed to show it. Not even a little! ... I was going to edit my above post to add... ... sounds like the OP pushes herself too... I'm not surprised that the young(er) men find her attractive. Good health and energy are attractive! 1
Skyraider829 Posted October 11, 2013 Posted October 11, 2013 Yes it is...its my observation based on more life experience...I moved out of the house at 17, and at 24 owned my own small company, had a mortgage payment and a marriage certificate...Most guys that age today havent made it from their bedroom in their parents house to the basement. I can agree with you about that. Most of my employees are 20 something year old boys..yep...boys.... Some of them are boys, again I'll agree you have merit in your statements. However I've never been like that - perhaps that's why I don't fare too well people around my age, sans any generalities. Oh well... For guys in 2013, 30 is the new 20..Dont believe me?, ask any woman.. For some that is the case, not everyone. 1
Author skela Posted October 12, 2013 Author Posted October 12, 2013 Can't believe the difference a day makes. Now he is being super attentive.
FitChick Posted October 12, 2013 Posted October 12, 2013 He spoke to his buddies about his fear that you were out of his league and they told him you were handing it to him on a silver platter. 1
Skyraider829 Posted October 12, 2013 Posted October 12, 2013 Can't believe the difference a day makes. Now he is being super attentive. I guess he's finally taken the hint?
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