tylerj Posted October 7, 2013 Posted October 7, 2013 (edited) So - very brief background - dumped out of a LTR in June; started dating again in September, mix of on and offline ways of meeting; been on dates with 3 people twice each but none worked out. 2 1/2 weeks ago I met this girl who I had messaged on OKCupid. She is 25, I'm 29. We had a couple of drinks, and went into the meeting with the suggestion that if we get on well, I'd take her on a 'proper' date; if not, nothing lost. It went great, and we arranged to meet the following Saturday. We messaged via Whatsapp during the week and conversation really flowed. I was looking for good country pubs as potential date locations and noticed one did her favourite dish, so I sent her a picture of the menu and a simple ‘fancy going’? We ended up bring forward our date to the Thursday evening. I picked her up at 4:30. We left the pub at 10:00, with not a drop of silence in between. I made the move just before getting into the car, the first kiss turned into about 5 minutes of kissing. She thanked me after, saying she wanted to but was too shy to make the move. In summary, it was a perfect date On Friday night, we again agreed to meet (her suggestion), this time she came to mine. We watched TV shows we talked about during the week, for a couple of hours, before kissing for a further two hours. It was like we were 16 again. She left around midnight. Saturday’s date came around, and we went for lunch, a walk around the city and a pedalo ride on the river. We even did a little shopping together. There were some nice little gestures; we had our arms round each other on the pedalo, there was random kissing in the street, we held hands. She was going for drinks with some friends at 6; but we both hinted once she had finished (around 9:30) it might be fun to hang out again. We did – I picked her up, she came to mine again, and this time we got more intimate (though not sexual) on the sofa for a few hours. I eventually took her home at about 2am, after we kept falling asleep in each other’s arms. She said I make her feel exceptionally comfortable, that she loves my hugs and kisses, and text me afterwards to comment on how great the day was and how much I made her smile. I reciprocated. She said: ‘You make me smile. Lots. Thank you.’ Followed by ‘Goodnight, lovely man’, before we both commented that we were really happy to have met each other this week; and how ‘surprised’ we were. Work commitments got in the way, but we also had another fantastic date on Wednesday, bowling followed by dinner. Another 7 hour date in total She is now on holiday with friends, but we agreed to take each others dating profiles down - which I'm guessing implies exclusivity? Where I need advice This kind of whirlwind first week romance is new to me; I’m not uncomfortable with the pace and I feel like I’m reading the signs to be pretty good, but I’m in the awkward situation of not having experienced this before (my past long-term relationship was a good few weeks before getting to this point). I also don’t want it to become too intense too fast – not because I don’t want that, but I don’t at any point want to jeopardise a good thing What are the next steps from here? Just go with the flow? Edited October 7, 2013 by tylerj I broke the formatting
Woop1337 Posted October 7, 2013 Posted October 7, 2013 (edited) It's good that you are aware, and you recognize that you are going at a very fast pace. So all of these good things happened in one week? Ideally, with the amount of activities considered, it should spread out in 4 weeks. In saying that, good for you that you found someone highly interested in you. I say taper off the amount of times together. Just keep showing her a great time, when you guys do go out. A date shouldn't last more than 4 hours, and that's pushing it. It's in the bag man, pace yourself. Good luck. Edited October 7, 2013 by Woop1337 1
Author tylerj Posted October 8, 2013 Author Posted October 8, 2013 It's good that you are aware, and you recognize that you are going at a very fast pace. So all of these good things happened in one week? Ideally, with the amount of activities considered, it should spread out in 4 weeks. In saying that, good for you that you found someone highly interested in you. I say taper off the amount of times together. Just keep showing her a great time, when you guys do go out. A date shouldn't last more than 4 hours, and that's pushing it. It's in the bag man, pace yourself. Good luck. 10 days rather than just one week - Sunday through to the following Wednesday, though upon re-reading I was not clear. Thanks for the advice. Things have naturally tapered anyhow, with her being on holiday, but I'm curious to see where this goes...
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