Nancy87 Posted October 5, 2013 Posted October 5, 2013 When will the hurt end? I might just msg my ex tonight, i feel miserable. cant stop crying. WHY DO SOME PEOPLE BECOME SO HEARTLESS> WHY? 1
Author Nancy87 Posted October 5, 2013 Author Posted October 5, 2013 it has been four months post breakup now. I cant even think of any other guy. why!! why do some people fall in love more than the others?
Blastoplast Posted October 5, 2013 Posted October 5, 2013 it has been four months post breakup now. I cant even think of any other guy. why!! why do some people fall in love more than the others? Some things just happen, without any good explanation or reasoning. Don't contact your EX, for his sake and yours. There are TONS of great guys out there, don't get caught up in the past -- no matter HOW great things were, something made it end. Keep that in mind, it ended for a reason. Stay strong, you'll find a real man!
cavalier99 Posted October 5, 2013 Posted October 5, 2013 Month 4 is one of the worst. Just slug it out. Cav 1
Author Nancy87 Posted October 5, 2013 Author Posted October 5, 2013 i cant stop crying what do i do :'(
organizedchaos Posted October 5, 2013 Posted October 5, 2013 i cant stop crying what do i do :'( Have you tried Therapy? 2
JoelBarish Posted October 5, 2013 Posted October 5, 2013 I know how you feel Nancy, if that helps. You are not alone. I ran into my ex yesterday and she was with another guy. I posted about it in the coping forum. I am still really tore up about it. I feel anxious and sick to my stomach. I talked to my brother about it today. My brother is a really shy person. He dates about once a decade. Anyway there is this ex gf of his that he and my family always see around town. Since he isn't as outgoing as me I figured it must bother him seeing her around. I asked him if it does bother him when he sees her. He said it doesn't bother him and that he moved on. That's unbelievable to me that someone as shy (timid?) as him can move on so easily yet I can't. I go to pieces when I run into my ex. So I log on here and I find others who are more like me as far as struggling to let go. And that makes me feel slightly better. So that's what I am doing here, reminding you that you are not alone. And whatever you do, don't message him. I avoided contacting my ex or snooping her social media because I didn't want the pain of knowing the truth about what she was up to. Yet I found out anyway yesterday when she walked into the restaurant I was eating at. Please don't contact him. You will wish you didn't. 1
eric85 Posted October 5, 2013 Posted October 5, 2013 just know your not alone Nancy87, I feel like I have nothing even worth living for anymore. We had been together 4 yrs,started a family together, and were engaged to get married very soon. She dumped me as if this all meant nothing to her. I honestly feel like my whole world has came crashing down and nothing matters anymore. I can't even look at another woman because I'll start thinking of her. I wouldnt try n get ahold of your ex though, your just going to restart the cycle of pain and get answers you dont wanna hear, thats how it was for me anyway.
Author Nancy87 Posted October 5, 2013 Author Posted October 5, 2013 I cant go to therapy. i have some limitations... i wish i could.. @Joel, how long did ur brother take to move on?
Mariposa10 Posted October 5, 2013 Posted October 5, 2013 Do not be alone all the time. Go out with your friends.Take care of yourself. Force yourself to leave the house. Reach out for help with friends and family!! Things do get better.
Author Nancy87 Posted October 5, 2013 Author Posted October 5, 2013 I cant go out. i have to study for my PHD exam It was a small fite, which turned BIG n non reverting
Author Nancy87 Posted October 5, 2013 Author Posted October 5, 2013 I know dear but THIS TIME RIGHT NOW. IS SO HARD!
jimloveslips Posted October 5, 2013 Posted October 5, 2013 this isn't easy but you have to build a new life - do things you like doing... i had a very dramatic breakup many many years ago - i didn't function for about two months - fortunately i was unemployed and it was summer - eventually i just went out all the time, did some serious physical activity (i cycled and walked everywhere) was exhausted in a good "i went out and did something" way. I went to the cinema, went to gigs, went to the pub and eventually made some new friends who new nothing about my ex so couldn't ask about her... it literally took me two years to stop thinking about her at least once a day, and that was after I was in another relationship for over 9 months. now i only have fond memories, because whatever did end up happening we were in love and that can never be taken away... i know you don't believe this but it does get better, you will live again and love again and be loved 1
Author Nancy87 Posted October 5, 2013 Author Posted October 5, 2013 i know i would love again. but i would never find anyone like him. neither would he find anyone like me.
Sneaky Posted October 5, 2013 Posted October 5, 2013 It's okay, I totally understand. I read in a post somewhere that it will take as long as it needs to and for some people it simply takes longer because they have a bigger heart, that's not a bad thing even if it does make things more difficult, I'm the same way. You have to resist the urge to break no contact though, you are hurting and that's not a good place to come from when reaching out. Post here instead like you've been doing, people will listen because they do care.
Author Nancy87 Posted October 5, 2013 Author Posted October 5, 2013 How can some one love u literally LIKE CRAZY and then ignore u as if u do not even exist! N they are no longer responsible for the hurt n pain n torture they are giving..
Sneaky Posted October 5, 2013 Posted October 5, 2013 How can some one love u literally LIKE CRAZY and then ignore u as if u do not even exist! N they are no longer responsible for the hurt n pain n torture they are giving.. I honestly don't know... it just happens like that. I've read on these forums that it's because they either feel guilty or they're just tired of hearing it. I'm sorry things are going difficult for you tonight. One thing I have done in the past that worked at times like that is to just write everything down I could think of (literally everything) until I was just too exhausted to continue writing, then just deleting the file. Maybe it is worth a try? 1
Author Nancy87 Posted October 5, 2013 Author Posted October 5, 2013 But their decision involves US. its two people involved. both should have s right to say... This is unfair! Thank you sneaky for being kind!
JDPT Posted October 5, 2013 Posted October 5, 2013 I can certainly relate. I'm currently in a Masters program and for the past 4 days I have not been able to concentrate at all. I took my first to exam and got 100s on them and I intend to keep my performance that way but something keeps anchoring back.Be strong keep pushing don't allow anything or anyone to stop you from successfully completing your PhD. Think about the future, think about your livelihood and the so many possibilities. 1
Mz_sassy_77 Posted October 6, 2013 Posted October 6, 2013 I know how you feel. I still cant believe my ex didnt realize how good he had it with me. I overlooked a lot of things due to his circumstances but he didnt appreciate it and in the end I think he used me. Its funny when you BU with someone you see a side of them you never knew existed. I thought i knew him after 3 years and come to realize i didnt know him at all...sad. After a few months I'm still not great, but I do feel better. I think it takes time to move on, if you have a heart. Hang in there. You're not alone. I am greatful it was a few years and not a decade before I found out what he's really like though - something positive. 1
Author Nancy87 Posted October 6, 2013 Author Posted October 6, 2013 So i talked to him. ANIMAL! My advice to all u guys out there, never ever get weak! They are aaass holes to begin with! and this is their true colour that v r seeing right now! Weren't a good choice for marriage either. Just cant wait till karma manifests!
Author Nancy87 Posted October 6, 2013 Author Posted October 6, 2013 And karma always takes a toll on everybody. no matter how perfect their life might seem right now. Just wait... N praying is futile i guess, coz what ever God wills, happens, regardless of it all!
Author Nancy87 Posted October 6, 2013 Author Posted October 6, 2013 gime ideas for a perfect good bye slap on the face msg!
supaflyz Posted October 6, 2013 Posted October 6, 2013 You have to ask yourself what is the purpose of the message? If you did something wrong then the only time I think its right to message the other person is to apologize. I want to message my ex to sometimes when I get lonely. You just have to fight off the urge.
Author Nancy87 Posted October 6, 2013 Author Posted October 6, 2013 Oh ffs. Well, I hope you're happy. Now you're back to square one. And just because he broke up with you does not mean he needs some sort of karmic retribution. He made a decision, yes it sucks, but maybe there was a good reason...? Just leave him alone and stop being the psycho ex. Grow up. Be the bigger person. Dear Aspiring, May be its a little different when ur ex was the one to propose marriage. he should be a little responsible to ur emotions a bit. Even friends dont turn their back like that.. was a hurtful situation. cried like crazy, not before him but after But yes, not gona be a psycho ex.. Actually, everyone who comes up n posts here that they are abt to break NC, evetualy get their dose lol n come back lamenting..
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