Question concering my ex and istant messenger...Need advice

[AsGoodAsItGets01]

hello,

 

i was in a relationsip for alomst 4 yrs with a girl, she is now 20 (almost 21) and i am 22. she says she loves someone else and says she has no feelings for me at all. I found all this out 3 weeks ago and she told me a bunch of stuff that she was hiding and lying about even though we were broken up...i only stayed around cause we were having sex and she said she loved me and wanted to still talk and acted like there was a chance we could still get together...however i have instant messeneger and theres a thing u can put on ur profile called "my buddies." If you click on my buddies then she will be able to see who all has checked my profile, and it shows me how many times she goes to it...which is 3 times a day lately. She has also added people that appear in my buddy list and have checked their profile even though she doesn't know them...why is she doing that? it seems odd to me. I have cut contact with her for 2 weeks.

I have tried to change my name but somehow she has found it out, so I started using my old name again.

My question is should I change my name again or not? Also, I get on AIM a lot and I usually put what I'm doing on my away messages...so i just need some advice!

 

thanks!

chris

[citygrrl]

WOW! - Do you really believe her when she says she has no feelings for you, if she's checking your profile several times a day? Don't make any changes to your profile to try and send her subtle messages- and don't let her know that YOU know she is doing that. But the issue of the other people on your Buddy List - was she jealous or possessive? Are you still talking to her? Sounds like she's messing with your head! I would advise the No Contact rule, don't call her or try to initiate contact with her. See if she comes to you. One really stupid thing a lot of us do when we are hurting is to say some really hurtful things to the other person, even if they are not true, to try to ease our own hurt. Do you know for a fact that she is with someone else? Maybe this is just a sick way of testing you to see how much you care. Maybe if you do not initiate contact with her, she will come to you and say what is really on her mind!

 

P.S. - how DO you check to see who is checking your profile? I am curious to see who has checked mine!!!!

[AsGoodAsItGets01]

yeah we arent talking now, and i know for a a fact shes with someone else at her college...she use to say it wouldnt work out because he's jewish, but shes not worried about that right now she says. she has messaged me saying shes sorry for everything she has done and wishes the best for me...i never write her back though

[budd98]

My ex did almost the same types of things to me. The best thing for you is to ignore them all because if you respond to anything, it will just make them feel better about it all and easier for them to stay away from you. These type of women are still girls that have'nt matured enough yet. It is a sign of insecurity. Move on with your life and don't look back to see if she is following.

[ntovrhm]

If she is telling you she doesn't care about you any more, then I guess you should believe her. But you are obviously still on her mind if she is checking your profile everyday.

 

By the way, what type of instant messaging do you have? I didn't think you can check things like that? (I had checked my ex's a few times after the break-up, and it would kill me to know that he knew about it)

[AsGoodAsItGets01]

i have AIM, u should paste a link in ur profile and it says "my buddies" if they go to ur profile and click on that title then there name will show up and it will say what time

 

heres the link: http://buddytracker.us/homeBT.php?name=