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Got number at bar tonight, when to message?


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Posted

Text the next day, afternoon.

 

"Hey, it's _____, here's my number. (Insert inside joke if you have one)"

 

"Hey trouble it's ____, here's my number"

 

Those are my two go-to texts when meeting someone new.

Posted
This is very strange.

 

How's this strategy working out for you?

Works like a charm. There's no need for overt actions / touchiness in order to signal interest , if you're interested in a ONS. And touching/kissing someone is NEVER the way to go if you are interested in anything other than a ONS or if you don't want to get slapped or punched. If I am interested in dating someone I meet at a bar (which really never works , especially with people who were there on their own, since they're pretty much not looking for that , but for ONS) , i talk to them throughout the night and make lots of eye contact, smile, etc. I have a way of flirting in such situations that differs from flirtation for ONS . It's more tacit and in the course of conversation .

Posted
Thanks for the input/discussion everyone. I ended up texting her earlier this afternoon and her response was receptive.

 

So basically just 'ignore' that response and then try to set something (for later in the week) up in 1-2 days?

The wait shouldn't be more than 1 day max, IMO. I lose interest, fast, if there's no follow-up. Depends on how much that girl was receptive to your first text, as well. Did you send anything about going out? Or just gave her your number?

Posted
Send her a text in a few days -- re-iterate that you had a good time the other night and suggest you'd like to do lunch with her some time. It's quick, easy, non-invasive and is a good way to get to know each other a little better.

 

replace 'lunch' with 'drinks'. the rest is excellent

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Posted
The wait shouldn't be more than 1 day max, IMO. I lose interest, fast, if there's no follow-up. Depends on how much that girl was receptive to your first text, as well. Did you send anything about going out? Or just gave her your number?

 

Just gave her my number with the first one.

Posted
Just gave her my number with the first one.

Wrong move, IMO, and will have come off as lukewarm at best, but ok... *shrug*

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Posted

Well, again, it all depends on how desperate you are to get dates.

 

I believe most girls like to be pursued, so that may be a safer strategy to get that first date.

 

But, IMO, the purpose is to date people you like and with whom you are compatible. Ideally, a guy who likes the woman to chase him, would give her his number. If she responds back, that means she likes to be more aggressive and isn't shy of showing it, which makes them a perfect fit. If the girl is more shy and uncomfortable to text random strangers first, then chances are they wouldn't fit anyway.

 

Just like with the schedule fit: some people like to wing it. They would be more compatible with partners that appreciate freedom and spontaneity. If they want to date partners who are planners or in need of validation / confirmation, both would be miserable, on the long term or would need to work harder on finding that middle ground.

 

Life's short and I do totally believe in personality fit.

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