faithfully Posted October 4, 2013 Posted October 4, 2013 My boyfriend and I have broken up, were together for nearly a year. I seen him yesterday to help him move his things out. I am excepting the break up and told him too that's fine even though I am not excepting you. I am heartbroken, upset, hurt!!! Sometimes I blame myself because during our relationship I have been there for him when he lost his job and we moved in together working and taking long hours in work to support us. Yesterday when I helped him move out and had a chat I managed to get him to talk saying "its not me its him", I am literally the BEST girlfriend he has ever had, I need to find myself" things have gone worse for me and need to get myself together, How can I love you and treat you how a girl can be treated if I have no money"am ttoooo nice hence the reason he still wanna stay friends with me to not be friends. But the question that keeps going through my head is why are the nice people not good enough??? Its the "Its not you, its me" an excuse?? If ive not done anything then am I not good enough to want you want to work it out. When speaking to him, I felt his pain maybe am indenial, he's let himself go, not cut his hair. sits in and says he really need to sort himself out as hes turning 30 and not achieved anything in life, (lives at home with his mum, when met him he was living at home with his mum) and also said he wont be seeing any girl and not interested in anyone for a long while till he sorts himself out. Are all these excuses???
D-Lish Posted October 4, 2013 Posted October 4, 2013 Hey, sorry you are going through this heartache. Could be excuses- or he could be depressed. It's hard to say without knowing him. You however, do know him. Do you think he could be depressed?
dolita Posted October 4, 2013 Posted October 4, 2013 i think he has been honest, he even put down his pride about the 'no money' part and living at home and stuff, because that's not easy for a guy to say. you still love him despite all of this, it's his loss, just give him the space and disappear 1
Author faithfully Posted October 4, 2013 Author Posted October 4, 2013 yes I know he is depressed and ive tried sooo much to be there for you, just feel like a failure. sometimes when people say they need to work on themselves sometimes they do and I believe that's the case with him. He has been depressed since he lost his job and has no money for 5months and I think he has kept it all in. beside sitting in our apartment has not helped whilst i'm in work. but he did reassure me It really isn't me, ive done too much for him and he needs to do things himself as that's the only way he will truly realise(those are his words) He is the only child so hes had his mother smothering him like a baby and me literally doing EVERYTHING for him. I do think he needs to hit rock bottom n be alone before he can appreciate things n realise he needs to do things for himself but just miss him soo much and in a way feel sorry for him
Author faithfully Posted October 4, 2013 Author Posted October 4, 2013 Dolita- you talk about give him space and disappear, me to disappear??? I did do the no contact rule but broke it so he can come get his things as it was still in the apartment. then told him he wont hear from me again but was saying so much for being friend. the only way I can move on is staying away from him completely but am just scared coz if he texts me I might not have will power and respond to him. I know I need to be strong but at the min ive got no will power yet
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