Ireallydontknow Posted October 3, 2013 Posted October 3, 2013 It's been awhile since I posted anything on here. I thought I was getting better but this week has just been rough. I just woke up and it felt like day one. The surge of emotions hit me and I shuffled slowly to breakfast and back into my room. This whole week I've missed her so much. I was starting to move on and feel better, but this week, I don't know what it is. I just miss her so bad. I miss our inside jokes, our cuddling sessions, our movie nights, everything, I miss it so much. It doesn't help that I met this girl that I shockingly am really into. She just wants to be friends and that's killing me too. I haven't said how much I like her and I feel like I'm about to soon because I can't just stay friends with her. I like her way too much. I think this is dragging me down too, making me miss the comfort of someone who used to always be there. 2 months down out of 5 years. *sigh*
thetinmansam Posted October 3, 2013 Posted October 3, 2013 I know the feeling my friend, and it sucks miserably. All you can do is move forward.. Act like Jason Bourne and burn every memory you have with her. Yes, it's going to pain you to do so, but that's the only way you can preserve your sanity. You're going to be fine, I know it. We as humans go through these things to help build a better version of ourselves.
JDPT Posted October 3, 2013 Posted October 3, 2013 You are still very needy and I can certainly relate. This week have been challenging for me as well. Interestingly, I can always trace my way back to the root of how I'm feeling. It often doesn't necessarily help to improve the way I feel but I least I had an idea what to stay away from and change. We need to hang in there as it appears that we are still stuck on this roller coaster. It will get better.
Author Ireallydontknow Posted October 3, 2013 Author Posted October 3, 2013 Yeah, I think the whole vulnerability of liking someone again is getting to me. I'm lost as to what to do. I think I'm just going to ask her out soon. I have a feeling I'll get rejected. The thing is, with this girl, it was the reason I was so scared of being alone. I thought I'd never find the connection that I would with my ex, and here was this beautiful girl. It's so cruel.
thetinmansam Posted October 3, 2013 Posted October 3, 2013 Yeah, I think the whole vulnerability of liking someone again is getting to me. I'm lost as to what to do. I think I'm just going to ask her out soon. I have a feeling I'll get rejected. The thing is, with this girl, it was the reason I was so scared of being alone. I thought I'd never find the connection that I would with my ex, and here was this beautiful girl. It's so cruel. Don't have that feeling of "I'll probably get rejected." Go in there like the MAN you are and sweep her off her feet! You deserve someone who will love you for who you are, and treat you with respect! I know you've probably heard this a million times, but it's totally true.. When you feel deserving of something, nothing can stop you from acquiring it!
Author Ireallydontknow Posted October 3, 2013 Author Posted October 3, 2013 I'm so bad at this...I met her online almost 2 weeks ago. Is it too soon to ask? I don't know what to say. She said all the needy and pushy guys are making her run away. I'm the only person she met so far that is cool with being her friend and not expecting more. But I expect more, I'd be her friend If i wasn't so damn into her... I'm really rusty at this. 5 years of being with the same woman will do it!
JDPT Posted October 3, 2013 Posted October 3, 2013 It almost feel as if you are half alive and half dead. I too met a girl who I somewhat liked and was just going through the motions of asking her out and surprisingly she agreed and always contacted me. But over night I lost the very little interest I had for her and really didn't care to keep in touch anymore. I think I was forcing myself as at times I feel lonely. I think you should ask her and get it over with. If she says yes then great if not the same. I too feel so rusty being stuck in a 4 year relationship. I recall before I had NO problem picking up girls it was ridiculous. I have zero expectancies at this point, back to focusing on you and taking care of you.
Author Ireallydontknow Posted October 3, 2013 Author Posted October 3, 2013 Oh it's not even a little like. It's a huge like, we have almost everything in common. It's nuts! She is pretty too. I guess I'm just going to ask her out and see if she wants to give it a shot. I know she isn't looking for a relationship right now, but who knows? Blah, I hate this, love sucks, it's too complicated.
thetinmansam Posted October 3, 2013 Posted October 3, 2013 Oh it's not even a little like. It's a huge like, we have almost everything in common. It's nuts! She is pretty too. I guess I'm just going to ask her out and see if she wants to give it a shot. I know she isn't looking for a relationship right now, but who knows? Blah, I hate this, love sucks, it's too complicated. Don't take this too serious man.. I don't mean to call you out, but you seem like you're still in a "needy" frame of mind. Relaxxxxxxxx! You have enough time to take this slow. This isn't a video game.. The game isn't over if you don't get her to commit before a certain period of time. Of course, she could find someone new and you would miss your opportunity, but that just means it wasn't meant to be to begin with. Ask her out on a date. Hang out and hook up if you feel the need. Take things slow.
Author Ireallydontknow Posted October 3, 2013 Author Posted October 3, 2013 I decided to just hold off on it for now. I don't think it would be right. In the mean time I don't know what I'm going to do. I'm trying to get back into hobbies and distractions but the ol' ex keeps popping in. Why do i miss someone who cheated, lied, and used me?
JDPT Posted October 3, 2013 Posted October 3, 2013 You miss the "beautiful" moments you spent with her. If you analyze the relationship she was clearly a detriment to you and didn't give you the proper treatment and respect you deserve. Reroute your thoughts, focus on you, go to the gym and let it all out. Talk to friends and family and talk to them until they get tired of listening to the same boring stories you tell them. Later on down the line you will become tired of talking about something which is no longer relevant, and that's your ex.
thetinmansam Posted October 3, 2013 Posted October 3, 2013 I decided to just hold off on it for now. I don't think it would be right. In the mean time I don't know what I'm going to do. I'm trying to get back into hobbies and distractions but the ol' ex keeps popping in. Why do i miss someone who cheated, lied, and used me? The same reason I miss my ex who treated me like dog shiit - you care about someone, unconditionally. Look, here's the best advice I have for you.. Set small goals. Yes, I know it's hard, and yes, I know depression can hold you down and never let you rise again, but you haven't got a choice. What did Walter White do when someone threatened his life? Did he roll over? Absolutely NOT! He stood up, and broke bad. Now is your time to break bad. Although, you don't have to do anything illegal, or immoral. Break bad in your own way.. Take charge of your emotions and be a better MAN. This girl is trash, a little peon who doesn't deserve you, and she knows that.. Take the luxury of knowing you did the best you could, but at the end of the day can't change someone who is not willing to change. On this Earth, you get ONE chance! I repeat, ONE CHANCE to prove what you're made of.. To carry on to a better future.. To serve God and live the life YOU'VE always WANTED! Don't let ONE girl out of 3 billion hold you down. It's not worth it, and this too shall pass. 1
Author Ireallydontknow Posted October 3, 2013 Author Posted October 3, 2013 Alright I read Walter White and quickly stopped. I'm not caught up on Breaking Bad. Sheesh! SPOILERS BRO!
thetinmansam Posted October 3, 2013 Posted October 3, 2013 Alright I read Walter White and quickly stopped. I'm not caught up on Breaking Bad. Sheesh! SPOILERS BRO! I didn't give away anything about this final season, so don't worry, continue reading if you wish.
Author Ireallydontknow Posted October 3, 2013 Author Posted October 3, 2013 I agreed with a lot of it until you talked about serving God. Haha. Sorry, religions is not my thing. I try and take hold. I'm trying to break bad. I got a few girls into me, but I ain't into them. I'm practicing c# and Japanese again. I got a new car. I don't know it just seems so pointless without having my love by my side to be there...
thetinmansam Posted October 3, 2013 Posted October 3, 2013 I agreed with a lot of it until you talked about serving God. Haha. Sorry, religions is not my thing. I try and take hold. I'm trying to break bad. I got a few girls into me, but I ain't into them. I'm practicing c# and Japanese again. I got a new car. I don't know it just seems so pointless without having my love by my side to be there... Find God, and he will help you through this, I promise. Looking past that.. Date those women.. I know this may be wrong, and I'm contradicting myself by saying this, but if you are put in a position of "power" by having these "new" girls chase after you, it WILL help you become empowered to move on. Just try it, you've got nothing to lose.
Author Ireallydontknow Posted October 3, 2013 Author Posted October 3, 2013 Great! Another slap in the face! I was going through old albums on facebook looking at the funny pictures I posted. I got to see a pic of her all smiles with her new boyfriend. it made me sick, my heart went down into my stomach, and i started trembling in anger and sadness. I HAVE HER BLOCKED ON FACEBOOK SHE ISNT SUPPOSE TO SHOW UP. life is so cruel, I'm so tired of this.
JDPT Posted October 3, 2013 Posted October 3, 2013 Block it all man, don't keep doing it to yourself. I fantasize about the day I see with my idiot ex with her new guy, my heart literally stops beating when I even think it. I need to force myself not to. You can do it focus on you and no one else, you are all that matters.
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