LolaCarola Posted October 2, 2013 Posted October 2, 2013 My boyfriend of 2 years said last week to me that he isn't sure he wants to continue with our relationship. He thinks he's too young for such a serious relation. I'm 20 he's 21. We're both in college and he wants to have the full college experience. But at the same time he wants to be with me for the rest of his life. He said that he needs to choose between the two things. I love him with all my heart and I saw my whole life with him. I know we're young. But my parents are together since they were 18 so i know it's possible. He is going to tell me his answer in a couple of days. So it's all or nothing for me. We still text but I don't know what to say to him anymore. Does anyone has some tips on how to handle this? How I can maybe make him see that the college experience isn't all that sweet? And how to handle it if he does choose to break up with me?
waestofpaint Posted October 2, 2013 Posted October 2, 2013 Hello Lola, By "college experience" does he mean he wants to date around a little more? Maybe hes worried about going to parties and meeting a girl and having to tell them he has a gf, or hurt you. He could be doing the right thing and if yall are meant to be together you will get back. Sometimes guys just wanna be independent for a little bit, and as soon as you let them do that, and they see that you are doing it too, they come crawling back, and I'm a guy lol.
barky2 Posted October 2, 2013 Posted October 2, 2013 Thank you for sharing your story. Honestly, what hes saying,is what ( I'm sorry) you BOTH should be doing now,to get it out of your system so later in life call it "gigs" whatever doesnt present itself then. For me,I never got to really party in college because I was with my (ex). I'd work,drive to college a hour away and come home. Gigs hit me around 24. Her about 25. So we both needed a year to go get the partying out of our system to be over it ,and truly in a better place to continue the relationship. My advice,would be to wish him well,tell him maybe one day your paths will cross. Or you will beg for him to stay in the relationship, stay up countless hours wondering,questioning,accusing him. Make it easier on yourself. This isnt a bad thing for you either. His mind is made up, you also need to get on board. Take it from someone who has been with my better half since we were 15 and now 27. Ive been there op. Barky 1
Turnandcough Posted October 3, 2013 Posted October 3, 2013 Same thing is happening to me right now. You know what? I'm only a month of NC and it's been a great time recently. I promise the sooner you get out, meet new people, learn some lessons, an start smiling about life again; your gonna draw one amazing person to you. It may be him again it it may be someone better. See your gonna end up winnin either way! Your wrath a whole lot more than you think!
Fufu Posted October 3, 2013 Posted October 3, 2013 Dear LolaCarola. He doesn't find these 2 years of relationship serious? So what does he take these 2 years with you for? "We're both in college and he wants to have the full college experience. But at the same time he wants to be with me for the rest of his life. He said that he needs to choose between the two things." From the above statement, I assumed that his full college experience refers to being open to date other college girls. To me, it's totally fine if he's single and completely out of any emotional attachment / relationship with another person. It's completely selfish for a person that he wants to date other college girls and at the same having another ambiguous relationship. Are you sure you want this relationship? He's not even firm in what he wants and being together with you for 2 years he still donno about his feelings. My suggestion is to move on and leave him alone. If he wants you for real and committed, you will know for sure.
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