faithfully Posted October 1, 2013 Posted October 1, 2013 My ex boyfriend of nearly a year and I have broken up. when we first got together everything was great, as they do when its a new relationship, 6months into it we moved into our lovely apartment together and then he lost his job. I continued working and even taking extra long hours in work and doing loads of overtime and providing for the both of us to live and have a social life. I paid and brought everything in our apartment and made little effort to look for work. I even started looking for work for him but hardly really shown interest and that put a lot of pressure on the relationship. He would borrow my car and yet I would put petrol and even pay for the parking ticket which he has got whilst using my car. I finally told him I can noo longer afford to work crazy hours (60hrs per week)nor can I afford paying for petrol for him to go to his mates all the time while i’m in work. so he decided to leave and go to his mothers and stay till he sorted himself out. 2 weeks into being at his mothers, he manages to find work through an old friend he knows. He did say when he gets money he will give me for since i’ve paid for him for the last 4 month whilst living together. since he has been at his mothers his attitude towards me has changed so took it upon myself to let him know how am feeling about the way he has never considered my feeling, how used I felt coz as when he didn’t have a job for 4months I was the only person supporting him and as soon as my money are not running out and I can no longer afford him to take my car he goes running to his mother. After telling him that, he decided to tell switch it round and say i’m the one who has not treated him right saying he seen my facebook message and that I have been chatting to my ex who ive not seen for the last 4year and appeared to be on facebook same time as me and was saying hi( I have now deactivated my facebook account as this caused problem)- just general conversation. Even told this ex who ive not seen for 4years how happy I am right now and how ive met the right person. So he broke up with me saying he has never trusted me from day one and he suspect ive been chatting to other guys too. he did raise this with me 4month into our relationship and when he started accusing me,IVE NEVER EVEN CHEATED ON HIM “I thought if he accusing me he must be doing it himself" so decided to check his phone and I seen messages off his ex girlfriend but kept quite till the day we broke up after he started accusing me I told him I seen messages of his ex. I went to see him a week ago and told him am not gonna beg him back but I would like him to start trusting me again, so silly me changed my number so no guys who are friends would have it and even deactivated myself off FACEBOOK. we then decided to be friends and I wish him well and we both apologised for hurting each other but just to remain friends. I have now started the NC day 2 now and its hard but am going to stick to it, but I will do it. now I need him to come get the rest of his things from the apartment we both shared but he is delaying it as I want to move on and heal. What should I do??? soo frustrating!!!!
Ireallydontknow Posted October 1, 2013 Posted October 1, 2013 NC NC NC I've dealt with this type. They love you when times are good, but when it's time to man/woman up and be a partner to get through the rough times, it never works out. They just run to the next benefactor.
cif Posted October 1, 2013 Posted October 1, 2013 You did the right thing! You trusted your intuition that he was using you (I think he was also) and kicked him to the curb. Bravo! Pack his things and drop them off at his mother's preferably when he's not there. His mention of your ex and not trusting you are just excuses. Don't let those things hurt you. He's losing someone special and he knows it.
BigGirlPantiesOn Posted October 1, 2013 Posted October 1, 2013 You did HIS job hunting for him,,,WHAT?????
Author faithfully Posted October 1, 2013 Author Posted October 1, 2013 Thanks guys you are right yeaahhh they do love you when things were going good but as soon as my money was running low and could you longer keep putting money in my car for petrol so he can go see his friends, he quickly runs off. What annoys me is when he needed me I bent over backwards for him and did god know how many hours for him to socialise, get a hair cut, go on sunbed, paid his fines for him, I DIDNT RUN AWAY but stayed. Its harder to take his things and drop it off to his mothers as there's big things such as bed, wardrobe, tables and chairs that wont go in my car, so what should I do as I don't want to break the NC RULE??. I'm scared as he is very stubborn and don't think he will give in as this is what he's like. I just want his things gone so I don't ever have to see him and I can heal and move on Thanks any advice would be great
Author faithfully Posted October 1, 2013 Author Posted October 1, 2013 [sIZE=5][COLOR=#990000]BigGirlPantiesOn[/COLOR][/sIZE] I know!!! call me stupid, its the thing you do for love. I mothered him and I felt like he **** all over me when I realised I cant keep wiping his ass no more
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