Monodare1 Posted October 1, 2013 Posted October 1, 2013 Hi guys I've come to the conclusion that, horrible as it may seem, my relationship with the wife was a rebound that lasted 5 years too long (no disrespect to my son who I love dearly and wouldn't change a thing). I was in a long term relationship with a woman for almost 4 years and I did really love her, compatible both in sense of fun and physically. We finally broke contact in mid November 2007, I joined a dating website not long after and met the future now soon to be ex wife in April 2008, I'm sure you will agree a bit too soon. I have to admit that I am feeling very lonely just now and miss female company, although I admit not the exes company. Trouble is, I know thAt I jumped into a relationship far too soon with the ex and I don't want to make the same mistake, I also know that being single is a good opportunity for a bit of self development. My question is how do you beat the loneliness? How do you know when you are ready to meet someone new, should you wait until any divorce is final? Is it better to go through a period of introspectiveness to find yourself and develop yourself?
Misadventure Posted October 1, 2013 Posted October 1, 2013 Each person is different. I guess maybe spend some time with just you.. Love every bit of you, the good and the bad. If you "need" female company to satisfy needs, make it clear what it is. If you are looking for beyond that but not even sure what you want, make that clear too. Maybe just baby steps until you find whats right for you.
Author Monodare1 Posted October 2, 2013 Author Posted October 2, 2013 It's not so much the sexual side of female company (although I am a man and do like that side of things obviously), its more the fun side, my life aside from my son has been pretty devoid of fun for ages owing to the inevitability of my marriage ending, eg the slow death of the relationship and being aware it was coming to an end for months. I need the fun, the giggles, that kind of thing, I miss that. I feel if there was fun in my life I'd be a far happier person and would be able to deal with the eventual divorce a whole lot better. Maybe even a better, happier daddy for my son. I'm tired of feeling down in the dumps! 1
dumped2013 Posted October 2, 2013 Posted October 2, 2013 My friends have been my saving grace. You need to learn to like being alone. It takes a while but once you are happy being by yourself then you will be ready to move on.
Author Monodare1 Posted October 2, 2013 Author Posted October 2, 2013 So, would it be best to take a year out the relationship rat race? Concentrate on sorting finances, learning to drive making myself a happier better person? 1
pteromom Posted October 2, 2013 Posted October 2, 2013 I think so. You said you mostly want FUN in your life, so how can you change your life to introduce more fun into it? Maybe getting into a sport or hobby, or joining a club or group of some kind. Find and follow your passions, and eventually you will be a happy, whole person ready to build a life with another happy, whole person.
Misadventure Posted October 2, 2013 Posted October 2, 2013 Monodare, my friend does meetup groups and she said that's a great place to meet people, make new friends etc and not.. "really date".
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