Salvatore85 Posted October 2, 2013 Posted October 2, 2013 I guess you did what your heart want at that time by taking her back ?Did you regret it? Or did you think it's a lesson and it's worth it? Sometimes I feel you have to go back and froth a few times before you completely feel this sh*t is getting old and your truly over it and you can truly move on lol I have no regrets whatsoever. I tried and even though our relationship ultimately failed again I won't be left wondering "what if?".
hotpotato Posted October 2, 2013 Posted October 2, 2013 If an ex dumped you and comes back to make it work again, what can the reasons be? Apart from the obviously wrong reasons "Using you for sex" or similar, I can only imagine the other reason being "the dumpee hasnt found anyone else more compatible than you and they regretted it/realized you are the one " or something like that. Now what can possibly be the right reasons for them to come back and dumpers should give dumpees another chance? The person they left for dumped them. That's a big one. My ex came back after his new girl stabbed him. Serious. Only time will tell if they were really came back for the right reasons. They have to prove it, dont make it easy for them. Most dumpers are not working on themselves, they are dating or keeping themselves busy in some way.
hotpotato Posted October 2, 2013 Posted October 2, 2013 what about commitment problems? or grass is greener problems? How can you be sure those problems are gone?
Author h0000 Posted October 2, 2013 Author Posted October 2, 2013 How can you be sure those problems are gone? My 2 cents is that if you want to doubt you will always have reasons to doubt. (Same as every other problem I guess. Or sometimes you dont even know what changes their mind and makes them want to come back) Of course dumpers need to prove it hard this time but there is always a risk.Depends if you are willing to take it or not. 1
Author h0000 Posted October 2, 2013 Author Posted October 2, 2013 The person they left for dumped them. That's a big one. My ex came back after his new girl stabbed him. Serious. Only time will tell if they were really came back for the right reasons. They have to prove it, dont make it easy for them. Most dumpers are not working on themselves, they are dating or keeping themselves busy in some way. Did you take him back? and what if..you dont know they come back because they got dumped..?
Romaks Posted October 2, 2013 Posted October 2, 2013 My 2 cents is that if you want to doubt you will always have reasons to doubt. (Same as every other problem I guess. Or sometimes you dont even know what changes their mind and makes them want to come back) Of course dumpers need to prove it hard this time but there is always a risk.Depends if you are willing to take it or not. I think that's very well said. Doubt is ALWAYS going to be there in one shape or form. The beauty of a relationship is that it takes two people who are aware of the doubt, yet try their hardest to be the best they can be for the one they love. It's really as simple as that. No matter what happened in the past, there's always a possibility of something great in the future. This takes healing and maturity. The way I look at it is: everyone's at different stages in their journey and we encounter each other on totally different paths that happen to intersect in time. Maybe this intersection is not the best, but in the future, there will be other, more appropriate intersections with the same person.
hotpotato Posted October 2, 2013 Posted October 2, 2013 Did you take him back? and what if..you dont know they come back because they got dumped..? Oh no, I didnt take him back. Sometimes its just obvious they came back because it didnt work out with the other person. Even if they werent dating, they made a choice to leave. A lot of the time dumpers do come back, but by that time its too late. Dumpee has lost interest in them, dating someone else, etc. 1
hurts2death Posted October 2, 2013 Posted October 2, 2013 despite that the chances to make a good foundation after being dumped is zero...or at least if you are a kind of budist or i dk....its impossible for me... -johnOh no, I didnt take him back. Sometimes its just obvious they came back because it didnt work out with the other person. Even if they werent dating, they made a choice to leave. A lot of the time dumpers do come back, but by that time its too late. Dumpee has lost interest in them, dating someone else, etc.
hotpotato Posted October 2, 2013 Posted October 2, 2013 My 2 cents is that if you want to doubt you will always have reasons to doubt. (Same as every other problem I guess. Or sometimes you dont even know what changes their mind and makes them want to come back) Of course dumpers need to prove it hard this time but there is always a risk.Depends if you are willing to take it or not. And you wont have to look far to find that doubt... What happens is they date other people but have the same problems over and over. They are betting dumpee likes them enough to take them back despite their escapades. Plus, as time goes on maybe they start to see more of their faults as opposed to focusing on everything dumpee did wrong. Im not opposed to people reconciling, but many people dont for good reason even though dumper comes back.
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