KatZee Posted October 1, 2013 Posted October 1, 2013 she can be so loving when she wants to be and that's what makes it so hard to leave her even when she's not. i keep remembering those times and thinking what if i just hang on a little longer maybe it will get better. Hanging on for what? You've already done the worst thing you could do to a partner. You've already cheated. It's done, and it's only downhill from here. If you're this unhappy that you have to cheat, it's done.
samsungxoxo Posted October 1, 2013 Posted October 1, 2013 Hanging on for what? You've already done the worst thing you could do to a partner. You've already cheated. It's done, and it's only downhill from here. If you're this unhappy that you have to cheat, it's done.This... If the OP is having a hard time dealing with his gf's current mood swings and coldness towards him, then I can imagine how that will get even worse when she finds out what he did. He would then have to deal with even more mood swings and more problems than before.
ScienceGal Posted October 1, 2013 Posted October 1, 2013 This... If the OP is having a hard time dealing with his gf's current mood swings and coldness towards him, then I can imagine how that will get even worse when she finds out what he did. He would then have to deal with even more mood swings and more problems than before. The OP is a woman.
Author whathearts Posted October 1, 2013 Author Posted October 1, 2013 her. i'm a girl. not that it changes anything
samsungxoxo Posted October 1, 2013 Posted October 1, 2013 The OP is a woman.Thanks for clearing this but it doesn't changes the fact that she still cheated in her relationship. Cheating is cheating. 2
ScienceGal Posted October 1, 2013 Posted October 1, 2013 I completely agree. Cheating will only complicate matters, and ultimately cause more pain.
KatZee Posted October 1, 2013 Posted October 1, 2013 gender doesn't matter, the point remains the same. this relationship is bad for the both of you, and you're both just avoiding the inevitable fact that you should have broken up ages ago. she's not going to wake up one day and miraculously become this fantastic girlfriend. the relationship you're in? It is what it is. This is how it's always been and always will be. If you're fine just eating her scraps and being a cheater behind her back then by all means, stay.
CarrieT Posted October 1, 2013 Posted October 1, 2013 i'm a girl. not that that changes anything i guess. Okay, you weren't thinking with your penis - you were thinking with your vagina. No difference... 4
Sparkle304 Posted October 1, 2013 Posted October 1, 2013 I think you cheated because you were looking for a specific reason to end the relationship. The proverbial 'nail in the coffin'. You didn't have the courage to end the relationship so you took this route instead.....
lauri Posted October 1, 2013 Posted October 1, 2013 I know most people are mentioning to tell her ex that she cheated on her - but to be honest, I don't know if that will do any good. As much as I think I would LIKE to know my ex cheated on me, I really wouldn't. It's better I just accept its over, shes no good for me and its time to move on. I am normally all about honesty, but I've seen a few friends who have been cheated on by someone they love and still aren't over it 2-3 years later! OP in your case, explain to them straight up, no games and no nothing. You can either tell them the truth, which in my opinion may hurt them more, or you can just end it, walk away and cut them off for their own sake and healing process. However, if you keep it in the truth, the guilt may eat you alive and make you feel horrible about yourself. In the end, this situation is messy and there is no clean / easy way out.
Omei Posted October 1, 2013 Posted October 1, 2013 Not telling them the truth may not save them from pain. In fact it might ease it depending on what type of person she is at first she will be very hurt but perhaps it would save her lots of time of crys and whys? I still say tell her if you care about this person they have a right to decide what to do and how to feel about the information trying to hide and just leave selfishly puts you in a good light while this poor girl will spend months thinking its her fault. She should have the choice and learning experience this might sounds real harsh here but her knowing she will be able to dictate what type of person she might want in the future etc. You cheated theres no way out fess up.
Exitleft Posted October 1, 2013 Posted October 1, 2013 One thing that won't help you is blaming her behaviour for what was your decision. Just tell her you're unhappy and you cheated then let her go if she wants to. No one is responsible for your happiness. Being happy 50% of the time doesn't sound like a really successful relationship anyway. Good luck.
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