KeepItBoosted Posted September 30, 2013 Posted September 30, 2013 So it's been 30 days of NC on my end, she has been trying to contact me on and off for some weeks now. The most recent was on Saturday, 3 phone calls, voicemail, and text message. Should've just deleted them all but I listened and read. The voicemail was her wanting to hear my voice and call her back, how sad she is and how much she regrets everything. Sounded like she was crying the whole time as well. Then the text saying how she will always regret this for the rest of her life and how she doesn't know how to show me that she made the biggest mistake of her life. I am having a really hard time maintaining NC, I want to reach out to her, I still want to try and salvage something. I would've killed for her. She was the person I wanted to marry and start a family with...But I know I can't let go of what she did. I'll recap for those who don't feel like reading my original wall of text We were together for 5 years, great relationship, traveled, had a genuinely good time together. Got an apartment together around year 4, relationship became even better (or so I thought). She got a new job, I was/am still in school with a part time job. Came home one night and she said we needed to talk...she wanted a break. Gave me a bunch of excuses; it was her, I wasn't doing enough, she just needs time to think about things etc... I was devastated, but I gave her what she wanted. I moved back with my parents, what I thought was temporary. Well, for 2 months we were hanging out, "dating" again, sleeping together. I realize now I was the one doing the majority of the reconciliation work. I find out that she has been screwing one of her coworkers, also had sex with some guy who asked her out only a week after we were on our "break". On top of all this, she had strong feelings for the guy who hired her at her new job (not the coworker who she banged). She wanted to keep me strung along while she played the field, telling me everything I wanted to hear along the way: "This time apart will make us stronger and we'll be able to get through anything" "It's only ever been you, I love you more than anything" "I am ready to recommit to you when you are ready". After I found out about all this I told her never to call me, and went NC. So there's my little story, obviously just a synopsis. I am doing good, keeping busy and doing the needed things to keep myself moving forward. I do miss her like crazy sometimes but that's to be expected. I'll always love her. Had to update to iOS 7 so I could block her number without paying, pretty much the only good thing about that update. Damn, why do I want to unblock her already and call her. Life...you are a beautifully sad enigma
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