btc8 Posted September 30, 2013 Posted September 30, 2013 ...even taking 2 years off from it. I recently had a date with a guy I met on match. It seemed to go wonderfully: Laughing, reciprocal conversation, no awkward silence. What was good was that he said he wanted to go out again next week. Okay dokey. Seemed to be like a good first date. So, I text him today and ask if he still wanted to meet up, and he responds with, basically, "I think that if we do go out it should be as friends." Alright. I basically told him good luck and deleted his contact from my phone. This has happened to me before, and at first, I thought it was something I did. It really may have been in this instance, but his asking for another date seems odd. Are people really this flaky? I'm sure I know the answer, but I just wanted to vent a little seeing as it's been so long since I've been dating.
Leigh 87 Posted September 30, 2013 Posted September 30, 2013 This is common. It's more common of guys to do this, than it is for guys to be genuinely interested in every girl they date. U will come accross this more than u encounter decent me who decide there is enough chemistry or spark. It is the norm for one person to think the date was great, when the othes person doesn't feel it. Please get used to it, it's normal. It's also essier for them to let u down by text opposed to telling you to your face.
Intents Posted September 30, 2013 Posted September 30, 2013 Yep, people are this flaky. I have no idea why he would suggest that you go out as friends. Ridiculous. Some people can enjoy a date but upon further reflection decide that it was just fun and not amazing. They say they want to go out again because it's easier at the time and they know they won't be held to it. Consider yourself lucky to have dodged this bullet.
soccerrprp Posted September 30, 2013 Posted September 30, 2013 I think I may have to agree with Leigh. I simply don't ask for another date, but it is easier to do it by texting or email. Welcome back...maybe?
irc333 Posted September 30, 2013 Posted September 30, 2013 This is particularly odd because you usually never hear a man do this *scratches head* ...even taking 2 years off from it. I recently had a date with a guy I met on match. It seemed to go wonderfully: Laughing, reciprocal conversation, no awkward silence. What was good was that he said he wanted to go out again next week. Okay dokey. Seemed to be like a good first date. So, I text him today and ask if he still wanted to meet up, and he responds with, basically, "I think that if we do go out it should be as friends." Alright. I basically told him good luck and deleted his contact from my phone. This has happened to me before, and at first, I thought it was something I did. It really may have been in this instance, but his asking for another date seems odd. Are people really this flaky? I'm sure I know the answer, but I just wanted to vent a little seeing as it's been so long since I've been dating.
crederer Posted September 30, 2013 Posted September 30, 2013 He wasn't flaky he was just too much of a coward to tell you in person that he's not interested. And quite frankly, based on the fact it was one date he doesn't really owe you an explanation. Date on, my friend.
NoMoreJerks Posted September 30, 2013 Posted September 30, 2013 The going out as friends idea = I'd like to keep a foothold in your life so that we might f*ck at some point in the future or maybe you can become my f*ckbuddy or FRIEND WITH BENEFIT.
Author btc8 Posted September 30, 2013 Author Posted September 30, 2013 He wasn't flaky he was just too much of a coward to tell you in person that he's not interested. And quite frankly, based on the fact it was one date he doesn't really owe you an explanation. Date on, my friend. I guess flaky was a misnomer. I couldn't adequately think of an adjective. I'm GLAD it was just one date. For real. I consider myself to be lucky that this didn't continue for some more dates and then have him flip like a pancake in a matter of seconds.
Author btc8 Posted September 30, 2013 Author Posted September 30, 2013 This is particularly odd because you usually never hear a man do this *scratches head* Well, we are both dudes, but I agree with you. As a dude, if I find a potential date interesting, I will express my interest by being as blatantly obvious as possible with my words. This has happened to me before, though, so I don't think that the rules of dating/courting across genders really apply to same-sex relationships. Yep, people are this flaky. I have no idea why he would suggest that you go out as friends. Ridiculous. Some people can enjoy a date but upon further reflection decide that it was just fun and not amazing. They say they want to go out again because it's easier at the time and they know they won't be held to it. Consider yourself lucky to have dodged this bullet. Yeah, the friends thing was probably his way of trying to let me down gently, I assume. I sort of let him go with a backhanded compliment via text that was a little too subtle which went over his head. Sort of was cathartic in a way. Welcome back...maybe? Yes, welcome back! W00t!
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