Should I contact my ex after 5 years? She may be in trouble

[health]

Should I contact my ex after 5 years? she may be in trouble.

 

Backstory

- Together for 5 years +

- I left her cause she was emotionally cheating, 3 days later she rebounds with said guy.

- I cried probably every night for the first year

- Focused on healing, quit cigarettes, alcohol,

I'm in College now

- Dated some girls nothing serious

- Ex got with an alcoholic, weed guy, they're on welfare

- no work for the last 5 years

 

She was always a Hypochondriac, and now I hear she's on heavy pain pills.

 

It's funny how at first you'd wish bad on them and try to improve so much

 

Now I actually feel bad for her

 

I just want her to be healthy and not be on unnecessary pills etc

 

Or I can just completely leave it alone.

 

I could be like this because I recently came across some of our photos, and got scared that I don't have a passionate relationship currently.

 

Also probably cause of school stress.

[TaraMaiden]

Nope.

Keep well away.

 

Why invite negative drama?

 

her problems are exactly that.

 

hers.

 

She had choices, you know. She made them.

Don't invest energy in her bad decisions.

[health]

Nope.

Keep well away.

 

Why invite negative drama?

 

her problems are exactly that.

 

hers.

 

She had choices, you know. She made them.

Don't invest energy in her bad decisions.

 

Excellent, thank you. I won't contact her. I think I got like this lately because of school stress. Also I feel a girl likes me - who I don't like back.

 

Then there's a new girl I like, and I just feel sick when I like someone. Even though I'm healed - it's like if they don't reciprocate I feel scared, and then think back to my old relationship where things seemed to work so well for 5 years.

 

I will focus on school and continue to heal and go for my goals.

 

I recently checked her facebook and some friends told me about her, so that's why I got triggered.

 

I have to be careful, because sometimes I get a rush from it.

 

I'm at peace with her, and just want to fall in love again when the time is right with someone new.

[JoelBarish]

Excellent, thank you. I won't contact her. I think I got like this lately because of school stress. Also I feel a girl likes me - who I don't like back.

 

Then there's a new girl I like, and I just feel sick when I like someone. Even though I'm healed - it's like if they don't reciprocate I feel scared, and then think back to my old relationship where things seemed to work so well for 5 years.

 

I will focus on school and continue to heal and go for my goals.

 

I recently checked her facebook and some friends told me about her, so that's why I got triggered.

 

I have to be careful, because sometimes I get a rush from it.

 

I'm at peace with her, and just want to fall in love again when the time is right with someone new.

 

It took you so long to heal, crying every night for a year. Did she care when you were "in trouble"? Why would you open your old wounds for her? There are lots of lots of girls in trouble out there, you can't help them all, especially not one that hurt you so badly.

[health]

It took you so long to heal, crying every night for a year. Did she care when you were "in trouble"? Why would you open your old wounds for her? There are lots of lots of girls in trouble out there, you can't help them all, especially not one that hurt you so badly.

 

Thank you, and very well said Joel. I decided to focus on school, and use this as a step to get even better. I'm changing careers and a mature student. I have the future open and in front of me. Thanks again.

[HorseLuck]

You've come far. Very inspiring, gives me hope. Her life is no longer your concern. Don't look back.

[Reels]

Well.. I believe, you should see if she ever tries to contact you, if she tried, then don't ignore her!

[Polak]

Agreed with others on here. Her life is irrelevant to yours now. Keep moving forward, sounds like you're improving dramatically in your own life!

[love1336x]

Nope.

Keep well away.

 

Why invite negative drama?

 

her problems are exactly that.

 

hers.

 

She had choices, you know. She made them.

Don't invest energy in her bad decisions.

 

Well said...

[Sugarkane]

I wouldn't contact. Where was she when you were crying every night, for a year? I'm intrigued why some dumpers go for someone bad after a breakup.

[jba10582]

Depends on where you concern is coming from. I believe if it truly comes from an unselfish desire to help her out, then, serving others and genuinely caring for another person is never the wrong motive and it shows your level of growth and maturity.

 

You should not however expect that she would reciprocate the same for you. Have no expectations. Would you do the same for a stranger?

Edited October 1, 2013 by jba10582

[health]

Horseluck - Thank you. One of my goals was to have info and inspire others on my progress.

I won't look back.

 

Reels - Yeah, if she ets to me, I'll be cordial, but leave it at that.

 

Polak - I have improved dramatically. I have also met new irls who are educated ad arn't into smoking or drinking.

Plus just overall my quality of life is beter. Thank you.

 

love - 133 I agree!

 

Sugarkane - Exactly, that's exactly it. I went through the rief, and made it through.

I feel like I'm in the absoulte final stages. Just overall, mentally and emotionally.

I just want to build my career after school, increase my salary and move up from there.

 

Jb - I see that. It is genuinely comming from unselfish desire. I'd never take her back or want to be with her. It's more like

I want her to be good and happ, ad on the right path. However that's really

not my responsibility.

 

I decided all this was just a little slip, trigger an dtempation - so I will not

contatc her. Instead I'm putting that enery into making new college girl friends.

Just as friends, and in general just being friends with girls. From there I'll see what's up.

It's not like I'm desparate for a relationship right now, I've got business to take care of.

 

Thanks to everyone for replying to this thread, all the best and good luck with yours!

 

End thread