Broke up with my gf and think I messed up with a woman who might have liked me...

[oceanblues]

My gf of 4 years and I broke up last week (both women, me early 40s, her late 40s). The relationship was going nowhere and had no signs of growth. There was no intimacy for at least two years, emotional or otherwise. We were never going to live together, she was horrible at communicating - for example, making plans to go to a high school reunion on our anniversary weekend that I was planning something for. (Ordinarily this would be fine and we could work around her trip, but the fact was she didn't tell me - I just happened to see it on the calendar.) There were a lot of things like that. I was over the relationship months ago, but decided to stick it out for a short time.

 

We went on vacation earlier this month, before which I already had planned to end the relationship. However, she deserved the vacation as much as I did and I opted to leave things as-is. I had wanted to end it for at least a few months prior, but agonized over if it was what I really wanted to do.

 

Rewind about 2 weeks: I met a woman who knocked me flat on my butt through a mutual friend. You know how you meet someone and they take your breath away? That was it. Since we were from the same hometown and my ex was always complaining that I "didn't have my own friends", I started really trying to get to know her as a friend only, until I ended my relationship and could be free to get to know her "better". So, that's what I thought was happening.

 

10 days after we got back from vacation, I broke up with my gf. We decided to attempt to keep it amicable, or at the very least, civil, when we do certain activities with mutual friends. The next night, we did one of those activities, and again this woman I had been getting to know (slightly - she is sort of hard to do that with, I found) was there. She was very nervous & fidgety all evening, and I thought, maybe she likes me. I just continued the evening as usual - it was basically a "hang out with friends at the bar" gathering.

 

I thought my ex had already told our other two mutual friends who were there that we broke up. But at the end of the night, when the 5 of us were standing around chatting, my ex says, "Do you want to tell them now?" I just looked at her, because that was a horrible way to do it - in a group setting. She just went ahead and said, "We're no longer together." It was like someone took the needle off the record....

 

Our two longtime friends just said, we support you, we don't pick sides, we're still cool & love you.

 

The woman I had been getting to know said, "I didn't even know you were together."

 

Of course this shocked me and my heart sank to the floor. I just assumed that she knew - either my friends told her when we met, or because my ex and i went on vacation together, or whatever the case is. We started saying our goodbyes for the night, then my ex went to walk out the door (as if "her work here was done") and my new friend looked at me and said, "I'm outta here too, see ya later."

 

I don't know if I"m right or not, but I just got a HUGE sense of weirdness. I am NOT sure she liked me or not, but I just got that sense. So the next day (Thursday), I sent her a text to see if she wanted to watch the football game with me on the next Sunday. Her answer went something like: "Hey sunshine. We can do that...i told a few people to come over Sunday for the game, Let me check first if they may still be planning to come over."

 

To date (Sunday) I have heard nothing.

 

I know it's long, but my actual question is, might this woman have liked me and thought I lied to her about being in a relationship, or something? Was I wrong to assume she knew? I thought it was obvious, but when the bar proprietor, who I've known for 4 years didn't even know, maybe that was a clue.

 

Might I have a chance at damage control? I really want to talk to her 1-1 to explain and hopefully FIX it, and make her realize she can trust me. I never meant this to happen, but I also never meant for her to start liking me like that.

 

My thought is, if it were me in that situation, I'd think - hey, now she's single, I can really get to know her. But I'm not her, I guess.

 

Is there a chance to fix?