exilesoul Posted September 28, 2013 Posted September 28, 2013 A friend I have romantic feelings for is really confusing me. She keeps insisting I should open up to her but I'm afraid to due to a traumatic and painful past. She's never offered me more than just friendship and even though she has a boyfriend, nobody understands her like me and there's a definite chemistry between us. I guess my thoughts are why should go through the pain of opening up to her if she just wants to be friends? She insists that she doesn't care that I don't open up but then gets really upset and suddenly it's a big issue with her. What's the best thing to do? And why does she behave like this?
spiderowl Posted September 29, 2013 Posted September 29, 2013 You don't have to do anything you don't want to. She might be your friend, but friends have a right to privacy too and to only reveal as much as they feel comfortable with. Presumably she's sensing your reluctance and wondering why you don't seem to trust her. In a way, that's her problem. She is not entitled to personal revelations in depth from friends. Friends come in all forms: some will be very revealing about themselves and others less so. She can't demand that you be more open than you wish to be. I can understand where you are coming from. It may be that if you don't trust her more, she will drop you as a friend, but then what kind of friend does that make her? I'd say trust your instinct and act accordingly.
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