send_me_flowers Posted September 28, 2013 Posted September 28, 2013 hello guys just a little update its been 2 months NC on both sides today and im still thinking and missing him it don't seem i will ever get over the pain of not having him in my life. i am struggling with the ghost of him. i know i have no choice but to move on from this but its so hard as i don't enjoy nothing in my life i just dont know what to do anymore. i have had breakups before but this seems harder to get over
hurts2death Posted September 28, 2013 Posted September 28, 2013 patience must be your friend..... time will fade him feel the pain by that you will heal..at least how it goes for me... i feel sth similar.... -john
Author send_me_flowers Posted September 28, 2013 Author Posted September 28, 2013 patience must be your friend..... time will fade him feel the pain by that you will heal..at least how it goes for me... i feel sth similar.... -john thanks for the reply. i hope he fades away quickly because its just tiring me out 1
hurts2death Posted September 28, 2013 Posted September 28, 2013 while i find my self trying to hold from sth anything...a talk a smile a walk or just walking back and forth....i remember that she the woman that i loved with all my heart all my soul all my self and existence made me like this threw me away closed me shutted me down and that gives me hope to think rasonal ... why i still do this to me or you do to you? simple because we truly loved...... the action though was theirs dumping us... still we hurt... we are better by only that.... we must hang in there tough and get out of this mess..... wish the best -johnthanks for the reply. i hope he fades away quickly because its just tiring me out
coolheadal Posted September 28, 2013 Posted September 28, 2013 Doesn't fade quickly.. Takes time because what you had together and your mind-set have flashback images. But you change your life and do things you didn't do with that person. I also recommend removing anything that person gave you if you can. Otherwise you'll still remember what you had. Today is THE NOW! Your intent is to move on and start a new life!
Ireallydontknow Posted September 28, 2013 Posted September 28, 2013 How long were you together? What have you been doing to be pro-active? It's not going to just go away over night. I just had a dream about my ex, 7 weeks today since we split. Now those dreams don't bother me anymore. I don't over analyze them. Just keep working on you.
hurts2death Posted September 28, 2013 Posted September 28, 2013 yes dreams reduced alot also to me....thats true...
lindsay1990 Posted September 28, 2013 Posted September 28, 2013 I will be 2 months NC soon as well. In same place as you, can only say to be patient and believe it won't feel like this forever. I read other people's threads and realize two months is nothing, so don't get scared or pressure yourself emotionally to be "over" it. Push yourself in your outside life, instead, and try to accomplish even little things, which will help your frame of mind. Good luck. 1
Author send_me_flowers Posted September 30, 2013 Author Posted September 30, 2013 Thank you everyone for your replays. A new uodate my ex bf has been living with this other woman for 2 weeks now and someone said through the grape vine he us about to become a father. Well my world has shattered in a million pieces. I'm truly heartbroken and devasted I don't understand how this has happend to me. It's do hard. Not only have I been left they are living and meant to be starting a family together. I suppose it's time to remove this creature from my heart and accepte reality that I will never hear from him again. I shouldn't want to in time I hope I hate his guts. He had put me through hell and back 1
hurts2death Posted September 30, 2013 Posted September 30, 2013 nice said he is a creature.... but karma also comes to creatures....as it does to all. i wish you make it.. just stay out from his life completely...let hime deal with his destiny....sooner or later you will see the news...i can reassure you justice comes to all at the end... sth better is for you now....and you have the ticket to go from him... wish the best hugs 1
Author send_me_flowers Posted September 30, 2013 Author Posted September 30, 2013 at the moment i feel worthless that i look back and let him treat me this way waiting for him to come out of jail. sticking my him. than he has someone all along, i hope he gets his karma but by that i won't care or even think of him. we all deserve happiness but he dosnt hes hearless man. who doesnt care for anyone but himself very selfish thank you im just so upset at this time. i have been dumped and left and now they are living together, his life is going good for him mine is failing
hurts2death Posted September 30, 2013 Posted September 30, 2013 my perspective goes like this.. i am john and evything and all died in my world...so now i am making a new world.....with the power of my soul.... john i believe that the best thing is that i m the dumpee if i was the dumper i would die...i guess cause i have morals.... anyway. send me flowers i promise you all will begood ..just stay strong
JDPT Posted September 30, 2013 Posted September 30, 2013 Quiet honestly 2 months is not long at all. You have made progress albeit you may not agree. Continue focusing on yourself and know that you will crawl out of this hole you are in soon. 2
Hope737 Posted September 30, 2013 Posted September 30, 2013 I'm now six months no contact with my ex. We were together for five years and have known eachother for ten years. I can tell you it DOES get better but it depends entirely on an individual's circumstances. I'm still struggling as she meant the world to me and to cut her out of my life was the most heart breaking decision I've ever had to make. Not a day goes by where I don't think of her, I really should be getting over her by now but I'm still not able to move on. I guess my advice is just let the ride take its course. I guess that pretty much mirrors the other advice you've received but it's all I can think of. You'll recover when you're ready. I'm hoping it'll happen fairly naturally in a gradual transition. Like I say, it's been six months NC for me and it has got slightly better but it's an interesting journey and it's definitely changed who I am. I'm a different person from this time six months ago and I see it as a change for the better!
Author send_me_flowers Posted September 30, 2013 Author Posted September 30, 2013 my perspective goes like this.. i am john and evything and all died in my world...so now i am making a new world.....with the power of my soul.... john i believe that the best thing is that i m the dumpee if i was the dumper i would die...i guess cause i have morals.... anyway. send me flowers i promise you all will begood ..just stay strong thanks john its just hard that i put my heart and soul into my relationship like you like everyone else on this board i stuck there when he had locked up in pen i looked after him he was what i thought was a good person. i gave him anything he needed emotional support everything. i done that sentence side by side and all along he had another waiting in the wings he treated me awful knocked my self esteam from me and left me for someone else and is starting a family with. i just feel as though im nothing. i done NC in the hope of him realising what he lost but i seem like i am nothing it hurts that im nothing to miss. nothing to care and nothing to love, i feel tat this girl is who he really loved he knew her before me why didnt she be there for him why did he have to use me 1
Author send_me_flowers Posted September 30, 2013 Author Posted September 30, 2013 Quiet honestly 2 months is not long at all. You have made progress albeit you may not agree. Continue focusing on yourself and know that you will crawl out of this hole you are in soon. i know 2 months is nothing. but i have had hope in them 2 months but now i have to let go once and for all. truth is he doesnt miss me and he doesnt want me or care for me
Author send_me_flowers Posted September 30, 2013 Author Posted September 30, 2013 I'm now six months no contact with my ex. We were together for five years and have known eachother for ten years. I can tell you it DOES get better but it depends entirely on an individual's circumstances. I'm still struggling as she meant the world to me and to cut her out of my life was the most heart breaking decision I've ever had to make. Not a day goes by where I don't think of her, I really should be getting over her by now but I'm still not able to move on. I guess my advice is just let the ride take its course. I guess that pretty much mirrors the other advice you've received but it's all I can think of. You'll recover when you're ready. I'm hoping it'll happen fairly naturally in a gradual transition. Like I say, it's been six months NC for me and it has got slightly better but it's an interesting journey and it's definitely changed who I am. I'm a different person from this time six months ago and I see it as a change for the better! thats good im glad you have improved for better. mine is different he never loved me he cheated and left me. i mean nothing he has set up home and family with his new girlfriend. i had a down fall last night when i found out i suppose now i can get my bearings togethere and move on without hoping he will be back for me now i know its gone forever and have to heal and move on
hurts2death Posted September 30, 2013 Posted September 30, 2013 send me flowers you have advantage in this situation...you are free.. no guilt..nth nada...just imagine if you where the dumper.... trust me you will be stronger tougher better and happy....and in the long run you will like that you were the one tha wouldnt let go.... manners morals ethics....soul...you aint a brick like he probably is... just take your time...the good is comming...thanks john its just hard that i put my heart and soul into my relationship like you like everyone else on this board i stuck there when he had locked up in pen i looked after him he was what i thought was a good person. i gave him anything he needed emotional support everything. i done that sentence side by side and all along he had another waiting in the wings he treated me awful knocked my self esteam from me and left me for someone else and is starting a family with. i just feel as though im nothing. i done NC in the hope of him realising what he lost but i seem like i am nothing it hurts that im nothing to miss. nothing to care and nothing to love, i feel tat this girl is who he really loved he knew her before me why didnt she be there for him why did he have to use me 1
hurts2death Posted September 30, 2013 Posted September 30, 2013 send me flowers let me give one more perspective here... 1.we did the step in to the unknown to trust them 2.we didnt give up hope 3.we commited to them and had faith 4.we believed... all these make us god and them? everything else but not god... think of it. who is in advantage eventualy the dumper or the dumpee? 1
Author send_me_flowers Posted September 30, 2013 Author Posted September 30, 2013 send me flowers you have advantage in this situation...you are free.. no guilt..nth nada...just imagine if you where the dumper.... trust me you will be stronger tougher better and happy....and in the long run you will like that you were the one tha wouldnt let go.... manners morals ethics....soul...you aint a brick like he probably is... just take your time...the good is comming... thank you john but he doesnt care about none of that or being the dumper he just cares for himself and his new girl. nothing for me so it will be highly unlikey he will ever feel guilt for how he treated me im really hurt how someoen can do that to another human being without no remorse. i do really hope the good is to come, because right now i feel nothing worthless
hurts2death Posted September 30, 2013 Posted September 30, 2013 he doesnt know but he is building his hell.... and you are not in it. be happy.thank you john but he doesnt care about none of that or being the dumper he just cares for himself and his new girl. nothing for me so it will be highly unlikey he will ever feel guilt for how he treated me im really hurt how someoen can do that to another human being without no remorse. i do really hope the good is to come, because right now i feel nothing worthless 1
Author send_me_flowers Posted September 30, 2013 Author Posted September 30, 2013 send me flowers let me give one more perspective here... 1.we did the step in to the unknown to trust them 2.we didnt give up hope 3.we commited to them and had faith 4.we believed... all these make us god and them? everything else but not god... think of it. who is in advantage eventualy the dumper or the dumpee? i supposse us i hope he gets his big fat karma i will never know about that but i hope he does
hurts2death Posted September 30, 2013 Posted September 30, 2013 lady look. the life spam is short. what separates us in the end is these things that cant be bought..the good and the bad.. we made a choice to be the good..... what else to say... the thing you say about karma is the least because he is stragling to get it he is building it and it is going to be his result.... above all we must remain good not wish them bad...if it is one thing they cant avoid that is destiny.... i supposse us i hope he gets his big fat karma i will never know about that but i hope he does
Author send_me_flowers Posted September 30, 2013 Author Posted September 30, 2013 lady look. the life spam is short. what separates us in the end is these things that cant be bought..the good and the bad.. we made a choice to be the good..... what else to say... the thing you say about karma is the least because he is stragling to get it he is building it and it is going to be his result.... above all we must remain good not wish them bad...if it is one thing they cant avoid that is destiny.... but his life is going great. hes got someone he loves he is getting on. my life is falling apart i have no one to love and nothing to look forward to. i cat wish him anything. he has broke my heart the only thing i have going for me is that i never once ave begged or cried or pleaded for him to come back. he probably doesnt even know how much im hurt i have not contacted him at all. i couldnt now anyway because i dont know where he is
hurts2death Posted September 30, 2013 Posted September 30, 2013 TIME everything seems well for now everything will be good for you..i can only promise...hugs...john
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