Mariposa10 Posted September 28, 2013 Posted September 28, 2013 You should've gone out with your friends! I truly hope you're not torturing yourself with all this uncertainty... When did you guys break up? 1
Author sjm Posted September 28, 2013 Author Posted September 28, 2013 All my friends are trying to be here but I just want to be by myself 3 months ago now.
Mariposa10 Posted September 28, 2013 Posted September 28, 2013 All my friends are trying to be here but I just want to be by myself 3 months ago now. I know how you feel, I didn't want to see any of my friends when I recently broke up with my ex, but now I force myself...
harrybrown Posted September 28, 2013 Posted September 28, 2013 I am sorry that you are going through this now, but it is better than getting married and divorced later. 2
ConfusedHumanBeing Posted September 28, 2013 Posted September 28, 2013 How do you think he is feeling? There is where your problem lies. You shouldnt care how he is feeling because he obviously doesnt care how you feel. He can go f*** himself. 1
melell Posted September 28, 2013 Posted September 28, 2013 I am always tempted to post and ask how others think my ex might be feeling. But honestly, there is no point even wondering.. You'll still wonder of course, I know I do, but the best thing you can do tell yourself 'there is no point' or something similar.
Author sjm Posted October 14, 2013 Author Posted October 14, 2013 We broke up our engagement 3 months ago, is that still fresh or is that ages ago? The question I ask is because I feel like it's been sooooo long but others tell me it's still fresh.
Mz_sassy_77 Posted October 14, 2013 Posted October 14, 2013 It really does depend on the individual. To me three months is still fresh. However my ex is very very happy and seems to have moved on pretty quick. All comes down to the individual I think and how much they loved the OP.
Fufu Posted October 14, 2013 Posted October 14, 2013 Personally, 3 months considered fresh (but I guess it varies on individuals) I hope you are starting your personal healing journey. (Just to share: My ex also broke off our engagement that was in around late 2010) 1
Author sjm Posted October 14, 2013 Author Posted October 14, 2013 Personally, 3 months considered fresh (but I guess it varies on individuals) I hope you are starting your personal healing journey. (Just to share: My ex also broke off our engagement that was in around late 2010) how did you deal with this? im shattered.
Author sjm Posted October 14, 2013 Author Posted October 14, 2013 i have no idea how much more he can take from me
Fufu Posted October 14, 2013 Posted October 14, 2013 how did you deal with this? im shattered. I dealt hard with it. I most likely went through what you are feeling right now. Took me almost 3 years to have a complete recovery. It's long but I'm healed now But you don't have to to go through 3 years like me to get healed. Start telling yourself that this is a true blessing in disguise. Can you imagine if you married him and maybe something worse can happen? Be strong, you can do it. 1
lauri Posted October 14, 2013 Posted October 14, 2013 The best way to deal with this is to think to yourself this - if he really was worth my time, we would still be together. You need to stop focusing your energy and thinking on someone who isn't worth your time / didn't love you enough to keep you happy. I too need to follow the advice above, but I keep telling myself if my ex was worth it then non of this **** would have happened. You know you are worth a lot more then how you are feeling!!! I seriously can't wait till you find the most amazing guy who will give you so much more then you could have imagined...you'll look back and realize that what happened was for the best. 1
aybc123 Posted October 14, 2013 Posted October 14, 2013 There is where your problem lies. You shouldnt care how he is feeling because he obviously doesnt care how you feel. He can go f*** himself. I hate this kind of attitude that just because an ex is an ex they suddenly become some kind of 2D villain that has no feelings. You loved that person(s) more than anyone else in the world for a period of time, they dont stop being that person, sometimes things just don't work out and it's sad but noones fault, most falling outs are miscommunication or people being in different places at different times causing a lack of empathy. And then of course a small proportion of people are *******s who actually do screw people over and deserve to be scorned. Sorry for the tangent, OP, I dont know what happened but 100% he's thinking about it although he might not admit that to you. And 3 months isn't that long, it depends how long you were together, If i was engaged to someone i'd imagine it'd probably take me around a year until i was ready for another relationship, and even then it would probably have to be casual dating.
Lizrd3000 Posted October 14, 2013 Posted October 14, 2013 You shouldn't put your energy in wondering how he feels, you'll never figure it out, even if you'd ask him. MUCH MUCH MUCH easier said than done, I know. but it doesn't matter how he feels. how YOU feel on the other hand, is much more important, focus only on yourself, that's the best thing you could do right now! I hope you're alright. 1
Author sjm Posted October 16, 2013 Author Posted October 16, 2013 when we were together i used this app that schedules cute texts to be delivered on certain days just as cute surprises about the wedding about everything. he knows they were done months ago and i completely forgot about them until he got the first one. its just i wrote some pretty deep lovey dovey stuff in some of them and it makes me wonder what he thinks when he gets them. i feel embarrassed mostly like i wish i could cancel them.
keepontruckin Posted October 16, 2013 Posted October 16, 2013 He doesn't read them. He just deletes them. He thinks nothing of them. You have nothing to worry about.
Author sjm Posted October 16, 2013 Author Posted October 16, 2013 He doesn't read them. He just deletes them. He thinks nothing of them. You have nothing to worry about. I hope to god!
mutant Posted October 16, 2013 Posted October 16, 2013 If there is nothing you can do about it, then you shouldn't waste your time worrying. The circumstances under which those messages were drafted have changed completely and there relevance is therefore obsolete. Your Ex knows this and it's up to him to decide what to do with them. You should focus on moving forward and forget about it unless he contacts you with regard to this, Until then keep NC and forge ahead. Mutant..
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