Kant Posted September 27, 2013 Posted September 27, 2013 Its been almost 18 months and I can't stop the way I feel and worse I can't feel it about anyone else. I meet wonderful, atractive men that I want to like I want to really like then. But I can't feel it, no butterfly's not excitement not spark, no desire and day dreams. Friendship, appreciation, tenderness all of this I can feel, but that I feel that way about family and friends. I want to want someone again. And sex which I have always loved is now much of a muchness in my life. The sex i've had has been nice , I don't want nice sex. I want SEX! the kind wear you just want to tear there cloths of with your teeth. How do you get that spark back? It not about me feeling sexy I want to feel attracted to someone again. I want to want someone again.
mikejensen3355 Posted September 27, 2013 Posted September 27, 2013 Be happy if the pain is gone, at least. It might take a while to find someone new, but right now I'd give anything for this pain to be gone. I don't have fun going out and doing anything anymore. And when I see any kids I'm reminded of hers who I loved like my own and will never see again. Everyone says things will get better, it feels impossible. But if you're already out there looking and the pain has subsided, be grateful. Others like myself would kill to be where you're at.
melell Posted September 27, 2013 Posted September 27, 2013 I know what you mean, I am only 3.5 months out, and I honestly cannot imagine 'wanting' anyone again. I am certainly not interested in sex. The other poster made a good point, be glad that the pain is over. I can tell you that I feel so much better than I did in month 1 BUT I have to remind myself of that. We kinda forget the pain. And nothing seems worse than the issue at present. It is not fair. My memory is serving me well, after 8 years together I can't even picture his face anymore.
Author Kant Posted September 28, 2013 Author Posted September 28, 2013 I'm not past the pain, it's a dull pain now that never seems to quite go away. I've gone NC but my mind betrays me every day, he is always in my thoughts. Not being able to really re-connect with someone else compounds how much that hurts. Now I not only feel hurt, I feel broken as a potential partner.
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