violagirl87 Posted November 27, 2004 Posted November 27, 2004 I've been dating this new guy for about a month now. He's amazingly sweet, and well, we haven't done much sexually yet. We were discussing what he had done in his sexual past (which isn't much... awww, hes so sweet!). And then we were sort of talking about what I had done, and he said he would rather not know because it won't do him any good. So at this point in time, he doesn't know for sure that I've had sex. His opinion is that he'd rather assume and have a chance at being wrong than know for sure. What do you think of this? I can't decide, because if it were me, I'd really want to know!
UCFKevin Posted November 27, 2004 Posted November 27, 2004 You are completely off the map with this one. He doesn't want to know because he doesn't want to know. He doesn't want to have any images in his head. He doesn't want to worry about not measuring up, or having his idea of you tarnished in any way. It's MUCH better this way, trust me. The past is in the past. Leave it there. Learn from it, but leave it there.
SoleMate Posted November 28, 2004 Posted November 28, 2004 He doesn't want to know because he's smart. Just you both play it safe - use protection - and look to the future, not the past.
RC77 Posted November 29, 2004 Posted November 29, 2004 To be honest it always makes me feel bad when my girlfriend talks about her previous experiences. Just because it always makes me feel like I have to measure up to something, or that it is bad that I am less experienced than her. Sounds like you should let him have his way
ps123 Posted November 29, 2004 Posted November 29, 2004 he said he would rather not know because it won't do him any good Actually, this is quite impressive. Hes right. I wish I could have the same attitude sometimes. Sometimes guys want to know because theyre curious, sometimes they want to know so they know what theyre getting into. A persons sexual past can say a lot about them (not always, but sometimes). I think its good that hes strong enough to not want to know and wants to base your relationship on just whats happened between the two of you and not your past.
Merin Posted November 29, 2004 Posted November 29, 2004 Yay for your boyfriend! Seriously.. I think it's more than fine that he doesn't want to know. Fact is, even if you told him about past sexual relationships.. he's right that it wouldn't do him any good.. the past is the past and cannot be undone. I had the exact opposite and lemme tell you it was a nightmare. I had not wanted to know about his past.. yet he insisted on telling me, and I didn't have anything to hide regarding my past yet he always tried to make me feel that I had somehow cheated on him BEFORE I had actually ever met him.
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