wrong thread. heres new title, I TRULY REGREAT THIS, WILL A BREAK ?!

[k0rl0]

My boyfriend and I have been together for 7 months and he is very old fashioned and since ive been cheated and lied to my whole life i kinda talked to a couple friends who would hit on me when we had a bump in the relationship. he never talked to girls and he was very commited. I didnt know he was that serious with me but when he finally told me and we were gonna try at the relationship seriously he wanted to make sure so he asked for my phone and i was dishonest cuz i did keep contact w some friends in the very begining of the relationship, basically he didnt want me to have any guy friends and hanging out if they liked me. so he got mad and was about to break up but then his mom heard us talking about it and she said he should give me a chance, one last chance. i told him that since he said he was serious w me that i was gonna show him w everyday actions that hes the one i love and i was begining to but how if he had to look through my past? him and his mom talked and he came back to tell me that we should take a break, that he is very mad couldnt be with me then, to take some time off for now but who knows when we come back. he said that during that time we could see what i end up doing with my time. so i agreed and immediately erased all social media and changed my number. now what? will he even try to return? a break, wouldnt he have just broken up with me and not have to deal with it? i am very confused, why not just end it? means he might still want to give it a chance but just needs to cool off?

[lindsay1990]

I'm going to go straight to the larger issue I see here.

 

 

WHY DOES HIS MOTHER HAVE A SAY IN THIIIIISSS???

 

 

Get out while you still can.

[k0rl0]

im new at relationships so i wasnt thinking so clear. i know its stupid but hey theres always a first time so thats why i need feedback...

[lindsay1990]

I didn't mean it in a judgemental way. Bot from my personal experiences, the good and the bad things also get magnified as time goes by in a relationship so it may be a good idea for you to take some time and evaluate with a clear head if you are comfortable with your partner analysing your past, your actions, your phone contents with anybody else but you.

 

And specially, his mother, as in the future in the case of disputes, she will find herself involved again and it might start to feel like an "them vs. me" situation. I'm not saying it is absolutely going to happen, but it could and it does.

 

Maybe someone more mature whom you can address issues with directly and privately?

[k0rl0]

well we were in his house in his room and when he found out i was dishonest about some things he got mad and his mom heard, the mom was on my side though. but anyway, yea i gave him permission to go through my phone but yea in this break i am evaluating myself and took out all pointless people out of my life because deep down i do want to work out with him. i just wonder how will we even come meet again? he did ask for the break so im guessing its not a break up because then he woulda broken up completely? ayeee its so confusing so i ran to get others point of view

[reddragon588]

ugh... my ex was like this... She would have all the important conversations with her parents and then come to me after, with her mind already made up. It was so hard for me. It's like I had no say in the matters in my own relationship.

 

These are conversations he should be having with YOU. These are the decisions he should be making with YOU. He should be doing this with you first. I'm not saying he shouldn't be open and seek advice from his mom, but the decisions about what's happening in your relationship should be made by you and him, not him and his mom.

[lindsay1990]

These are conversations he should be having with YOU. These are the decisions he should be making with YOU. He should be doing this with you first.

 

 

 

THANK YOU. I will never get tired of hearing this.

[AnyaNova]

Yes please! Hear everyone who is speaking to you on this. And take it from me. I am very certain that my exes mother had a large hand in the undoing of our relationship. Other than me, she was his primary confidante. If the umbilical cord has not been cut yet, the sad fact is, is that it is not likely to be.