MissNoname Posted September 26, 2013 Posted September 26, 2013 Hi I dated a guy exclusively for a year. We broke up once ( i left).He pursued me and we got back together. After we got back together and dating him for about three months, i found out he had a gf the whole time we were dating. He cheated on her and me and lied to me being single. I broke up with him a week ago by sending him a text saying that I knew about the other girl and he shouldnt text and call me. Its over!. He never replied to it. Im moving on but I dont feel good about myself. I feel that I wasnt good enough for him thats why he never bother to say sorry for what he did to me. I feel he didnt leave her for me but instead chose to cheat because I wasnt good enough for him. If he really liked me he would have broken up with her instead of continously cheating on both of us. With all these negative feelings are preventing me to move on. I wasnt like this before, im used to be very secure about myself. But after all what just happened, I feel and see things differently. Please help!
central Posted September 26, 2013 Posted September 26, 2013 It's him, not you, who has the problem - he lied and cheated. You are good enough, surely. However, that does not mean the two of you are a good match. I'm sure you don't want someone who doesn't choose you, anyway, and he has chosen someone else. You will find someone else who wants you and is a better match.
Author MissNoname Posted September 26, 2013 Author Posted September 26, 2013 It's him, not you, who has the problem - he lied and cheated. You are good enough, surely. However, that does not mean the two of you are a good match. I'm sure you don't want someone who doesn't choose you, anyway, and he has chosen someone else. You will find someone else who wants you and is a better match. I think whats bothering me is he never said sorry for lying and cheating. He's still with her because I never told the girl. I keep telling myself, that he did not reject me. I rejected him.
rakasan Posted September 26, 2013 Posted September 26, 2013 From his perspective, he knows he is caught and you said you wanted NC. If you are expecting him to chase after you and apologize, that is giving his character waaay too much credit. I understand being upset because an apology would at least lessen the blow but ask yourself this, would it change anything about the way you feel about him or the situation? I had an experience where my ex hurt me in ways I never thought he was capable of and after blocking him from all forms of contact for a week I half expected him to come knocking at my window begging for forgiveness. But then I realized NOTHING would change. Whether I got an apology or not, there was still no way I could be with him. I had hoped out of care for what we had he would man up and admit to what he did but it should have never happened in the first place. My advice: accept that he hurt you, learn what you can and move on. Not everyone is capable of owning up to their wrongdoings. Him cheating on you proves that you can't expect jacksh*t from him.
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