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Should I write happy birthday!


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Posted

My ex dumped me 4 months ago. I was rather clingy, insecure, made up some white lies and I've learned a lot from this relationship! She was my first love. She did not enjoy my company anymore she said and since I was a emotional mess she expected me to beg which did not happen. She actually texted my like 15 Mins after and asked how I was, if I was sad with loosing her which I answered with honesty as I had made some lies which we could work trough.

Overall, I've really grown and matured... I am the man she fell in love with again but better and I really want to try again but I am using NC.

Should I write her happy birthday and good wishes?

 

My thoughts of this: if she does not answer she has moved on and there is no reason for me to think of her like that. If we start to text we can take it slow. If she does say thank you and leaves it at that then she has moved on. I don't really care about if I seem desperate in this situation as this might be turn over my emotions.

 

Her birthday is today, so she is 17 and I am 19.

Note: she saied I did treat her well and I was a really good boyfriend! She was not just in love but loved me as her brother... But I acted desperate and clingy which killed her emotions but they can be revived ;)

Posted

It's your choice, but oftentimes it leaves us with more questions than answers. If you want to send a message you need to send it with zero expectations. If any answer, or even no answer, has an emotional impact on you then you shouldn't send the message.

 

She's still a kid and you're not too much futher than that yourself. You'd be better off continuing to move on and experiencing life a little.

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Posted

If that is the case then i will not write her. I guess I still want her back and this might be an opener to see if she is interested as she has a lot of pride and would

Not contact me even if she wanted me back.

Posted

I'll be going through the same thing soon. I'm over a week of NC, and her birthday will be in a few months, so I hope things will change by then. I'm 19 and she'll be 18.

 

And yeah, we're each other's first loves and all...it hurts.

Posted
If that is the case then i will not write her. I guess I still want her back and this might be an opener to see if she is interested as she has a lot of pride and would

Not contact me even if she wanted me back.

 

Like what's been said, if you wish her happy bday and she doesn't respond how would you feel?

 

How about a simple "thanks" for a reply?

 

Unless youre completely over it I would advise against it.

 

And nothing for nothing if she's too " proud" to contact you to get you back, she doesn't truly love you.

 

 

 

 

Barky

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Posted

Don't send the birthday wish if you have gone 4 months NC. It sounds like you have improved and feel better about yourself so focus on wanting to share that with someone that who will be "in love" with you back. It will happen again for you with someone else if you want it to.

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