Vinsanity1307 Posted September 26, 2013 Posted September 26, 2013 Here is my story...still encourage the opinions. They are appreciated.. I am having a really rough day today. I sent a letter in the mail to my ex few days ago apologizing for my in-sensitiveness past few years and that I was scared. And asking for a new relationship nothing like our old one. I also said if she doesnt even feel a little bit of the same as I do to not respond. Obviously no response. And it hurt, hurts alot right now. The anxiety and heartbreak even after 2 months. So My question is I have all our pictures, sex toys, I love you cards,her lingerie, some clothes and some other reminders in a crate at my parents house. Is it time to throw them away? Is holding onto them just false hope. I will not throw the pictures away that are on a flash drive with some hard copies pictures in the crate as well, or the I love you cards and emails... I was just at my parents and put the sex toys, her clothes, the lingerie, some of our cats stuff in a trash bag. And even just doing that hurt like hell. Which is why I am such rough shape now.. They are in my trunk now and not sure if it will hurt more if I throw them away.. I am so torn. And in pain right now please help...
monkeymaid Posted September 26, 2013 Posted September 26, 2013 sounds like your relationship is over and if (a very big if) you ennd up with the person again, you will be in a new relatioship. New relationship, new memories. Throw them away and start anew. Think of it as cleansing your environment. ..just my opinion
BigGirlPantiesOn Posted September 26, 2013 Posted September 26, 2013 Holding onto ANY of it is your resistance to accepting that it's over. Would you hold onto a burning piece of wood just cus she gave it to you. Your pain is self induced. Let it go if you ever want any chance of it coming back! 2
Author Vinsanity1307 Posted September 26, 2013 Author Posted September 26, 2013 I know. Its just really hard. Like I said the stuff is in my trunk in a trashbag...Just 5 years worry if some of the best moments in my life. ....so so tough can't even stress that enough...
reddragon588 Posted September 26, 2013 Posted September 26, 2013 I know. Its just really hard. Like I said the stuff is in my trunk in a trashbag...Just 5 years worry if some of the best moments in my life. ....so so tough can't even stress that enough... They were some of the best moments. But those moments are in the past. At some point, you have to make the choice to let go and move on. The only thing holding you back is you. If you aren't ready, put everything in a bag, put it in an attic or a dark closet or your basement or somewhere out of the way and leave it there. If you haven't pulled them out in 6 months then toss it. You'll be surprised when you go in in 6 months and you haven't used it and have no problem throwing it out. 1
Author Vinsanity1307 Posted September 26, 2013 Author Posted September 26, 2013 That's exactly what I did.I put them at ny parents house in a crate. But even then there us that holding on to false hope thinking she will come back. If I throw out the stuff thinking it will let go of some of that hope...
Author Vinsanity1307 Posted September 26, 2013 Author Posted September 26, 2013 Gross? How is sex toys with your ex gross? It's still had memories attached to them no different than anything else... And its not just sex toys,lingerie, some clothes, or our cats stuff... 1
oracle Posted September 26, 2013 Posted September 26, 2013 Im gonna go against the grain here. Depends on the relationship. Mine was 15yrs and took my from 19-35. its my entire adult life thus far. I would never consider tossing out pictures or certain momentos. Its part of who I am and will always be. It is my history and it has partially shaped me. There is moving on.. and then there is being bat f*ck crazy bitter nasty about things. HOWEVER- if its just part of your messy can't get over it scenario .. Ie using said sex toys and pictures on a regular basis while crying about days long gone.. then toss it all. If thats not you.. and ur a sane adult.. Put it in a box... and put it far away.. One day many years from now you will open it and it will perhaps put a smile on your face and remind you of what was once fun, but like many things in life was for a limited period of time. OR you will see it a junk and toss it out then. Either way, no harm done. 2
ConfusedHumanBeing Posted September 26, 2013 Posted September 26, 2013 Im gonna go against the grain here. Depends on the relationship. Mine was 15yrs and took my from 19-35. its my entire adult life thus far. I would never consider tossing out pictures or certain momentos. Its part of who I am and will always be. It is my history and it has partially shaped me. There is moving on.. and then there is being bat f*ck crazy bitter nasty about things. HOWEVER- if its just part of your messy can't get over it scenario .. Ie using said sex toys and pictures on a regular basis while crying about days long gone.. then toss it all. If thats not you.. and ur a sane adult.. Put it in a box... and put it far away.. One day many years from now you will open it and it will perhaps put a smile on your face and remind you of what was once fun, but like many things in life was for a limited period of time. OR you will see it a junk and toss it out then. Either way, no harm done. Keeping pictures and possible things like that...those are things you might one day look back on with indifference. If you were acting mildly sane about this, I suggest to keep them. BUT since you are losing your mind currently lol, you almost HAVE to toss everything. The sex toys and whatever gross s*** like that should have been thrown away a LONG time ago. Kept in a trash bag is really weird man..... 2
Author Vinsanity1307 Posted September 26, 2013 Author Posted September 26, 2013 I think some of you are getting things misconstrued. Basically all the mementos ie her clothes, lingerie, sex toys, our cats stuff, printed emails, i love you cards, and pictures (hard copies and on flash drive) were put in a crate and put into my parents house sealed when she dumped me two months ago. Lately I have been thinking that holding onto all that stuff except the pictures (which I will not delete) is holding onto false hope. Which is why I asked the question on here. So yesterday i went to my parents house and put all mementos in a trash bag(lingerie,her clothes,sex toys, the cats stuff) with intentions of throwing them out. But was having second thoughts which again is why I posted on here asking if I would regret this or is holding on to everything false hope? I am not doing any weird stuff with them or anything, so I have no idea where that came from.... and thats where I am at.
reddragon588 Posted September 26, 2013 Posted September 26, 2013 The first reaction is usually the correct one. Toss it. You said it yourself in the title of this thread. You're "holding on". None of the things you mentioned are irreplaceable.
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