Jiminy Cricket Posted September 23, 2013 Posted September 23, 2013 (edited) so i got an email this morning from my ex. if you know my story, my ex last told me to stay out of her life, and never to talk to her again. i've been in total no contact and only read the first line and not the rest. she said she wants back a vintage NFL starter jacket she got me for christmas a while back. this jacket means a lot to me, because i use to wear it to games when me and her were together. its really sentimental. even though we had a nasty break up, and i put it away, i'd like to look back and be reminded in the future of the good times we had. i think this is really messed up on her part, she's being an indian giver, and it's insulting because i gave her all these gifts and she's keeping them. i haven't read the rest and not going to, because i need to stay in N/C. i'm not going to respond. am i doing the right thing?? Edited September 23, 2013 by Jiminy Cricket 1
movingonnow1 Posted September 23, 2013 Posted September 23, 2013 so i got an email this morning from my ex. if you know my story, my ex last told me to stay out of her life, and never to talk to her again. i've been in total no contact and only read the first line and not the rest. she said she wants back a vintage NFL starter jacket she got me for christmas a while back. this jacket means a lot to me, because i use to wear it to games when me and her were together. its really sentimental. even though we had a nasty break up, and i put it away, i'd like to look back and be reminded in the future of the good times we had. i think this is really messed up on her part, she's being an indian giver. i haven't read the rest and not going to, because i need to stay in N/C. i'm not going to respond. am i doing the right thing?? Hey man, You are doing the right thing. She sounds very angry at you and is going through a lot of different emotions. I would not contact her back or give her back the jacket at all...it was a gift from her to you FFS. She is just looking for an excuse for you two to talk again and for her to say a few more things to you and get you to say a few more things back. It is probably driving her crazy that you have gone NC
lauri Posted September 23, 2013 Posted September 23, 2013 What you are doing is right. She clearly is trying to get back at you and I would continue to ignore her. What is done is done and you cannot go back now...I'm afraid if you contacted her or talk to her you will potentially lead to some nasty conversations.
Author Jiminy Cricket Posted September 23, 2013 Author Posted September 23, 2013 yeah, it really hurts. makes me feel like i didn't mean anything to her. i know if i respond, i'm going to go off on her again, and things will only get worst. i'm getting power back, the ball is in my court.
lauri Posted September 23, 2013 Posted September 23, 2013 yeah, it really hurts. makes me feel like i didn't mean anything to her. i know if i respond, i'm going to go off on her again, and things will only get worst. i'm getting power back, the ball is in my court. Yeah man it does hurt. I've been hurting for the last month over what happened with my ex and I've still remained strong and maintained NC. She hasn't reached out to me since I deleted her from fb and her numerous attempts to "talk". Things end for a reason man, and its best to maintain control of the situation yourself and keep moving forward. Every time you are doubting yourself again regarding her, just post on here and will get through this together. 1
Author Jiminy Cricket Posted September 23, 2013 Author Posted September 23, 2013 i feel like getting revenge and saying "i sent it to the museum of broken relationships, you can contact them if you want it back!"
movingonnow1 Posted September 23, 2013 Posted September 23, 2013 i feel like getting revenge and saying "i sent it to the museum of broken relationships, you can contact them if you want it back!" No man, you're better then that. Don't even think about contacting her or doing anything spiteful.
Author Jiminy Cricket Posted September 23, 2013 Author Posted September 23, 2013 i know, i know! i'm not going to say that, its just how i'm feeling. i just need to vent on here.
Chi townD Posted September 23, 2013 Posted September 23, 2013 To be honest. She could really give a damn about the jacket. The jacket is nothing more than a link to open up a dialog with you. I mean, she can't possibly fit into that jacket, so why else would she need it? Unless, she wants to give it to someone else (and if this is the case, that's one cheap ass chick!) 2
reddragon588 Posted September 23, 2013 Posted September 23, 2013 Ignore her. She gave it to you. She sounds like a piece of work.
BC1980 Posted September 23, 2013 Posted September 23, 2013 It will piss her off more if you don't respond instead of sending something nasty. People just hate to be ignored more than anything. 1
Author Jiminy Cricket Posted September 23, 2013 Author Posted September 23, 2013 you guys are right. the jacket is a M in mens, she's really skinny and petite. i sure as hell hope she doesn't give it to another guy!! i bet she's just using this as an excuse to contact me because i've disappeared from sight, no talking to her friends, deleted all my social networks, and haven't been bothering her like i use to.
Zahara Posted September 23, 2013 Posted September 23, 2013 It was a gift. She's an idiot. I think she can't stand you're keeping silent so she's trying to provoke you to say something. Be vewy vewy quiet. She'll go away. 5
Author Jiminy Cricket Posted September 23, 2013 Author Posted September 23, 2013 i already know what's going to happen. she's going to send me a million texts over the next few days, trying to manipulate me. saying how much i hurt her, gonna say "i thought you were a good person, if you just listened to me, we'd could have got back together, but now it's too late. f*ck you!"
Misfortune Posted September 23, 2013 Posted September 23, 2013 Winter is a coming, she needs that jacket. Don't give into her. 2
BC1980 Posted September 23, 2013 Posted September 23, 2013 To be honest. She could really give a damn about the jacket. The jacket is nothing more than a link to open up a dialog with you. I mean, she can't possibly fit into that jacket, so why else would she need it? Unless, she wants to give it to someone else (and if this is the case, that's one cheap ass chick!) I agree. The jacket is beside the point. She could have used anything else to serve purpose, which is to try to get under your skin.
BC1980 Posted September 23, 2013 Posted September 23, 2013 you guys are right. the jacket is a M in mens, she's really skinny and petite. i sure as hell hope she doesn't give it to another guy!! i bet she's just using this as an excuse to contact me because i've disappeared from sight, no talking to her friends, deleted all my social networks, and haven't been bothering her like i use to. Sadly, I know someone who requested a monogrammed leather jacket back after a breakup, only to give the jacket as a Christmas present to his sister. The ex's name was monogrammed on the jacket. I swear I'm not making this up. I really don't put anything past people anymore.
Author Jiminy Cricket Posted September 23, 2013 Author Posted September 23, 2013 could it be she's trying to get revenge at me for getting on her case about being with another guy? or is it because she's wondering where i've gone, and she's using an excuse to see if i'm even alive anymore? lol.
Simon Phoenix Posted September 23, 2013 Posted September 23, 2013 could it be she's trying to get revenge at me for getting on her case about being with another guy? or is it because she's wondering where i've gone, and she's using an excuse to see if i'm even alive anymore? lol. It doesn't matter. She's being spiteful and nasty and isn't worth a minute of your time and energy. Once she hands you a gift, the item is yours, not hers. You are doing the right thing by ignoring it and you should continue to ignore any follow-up conversations that she initiates. Does remind me of this scene though. 1
ConfusedHumanBeing Posted September 23, 2013 Posted September 23, 2013 It doesn't matter. She's being spiteful and nasty and isn't worth a minute of your time and energy. Once she hands you a gift, the item is yours, not hers. You are doing the right thing by ignoring it and you should continue to ignore any follow-up conversations that she initiates. Does remind me of this scene though. "I'll be in room painting....h*mo things. .." GREAT movie. OP, I'm glad you realize not to answer. Not worth your time. My ex, a year later, sent me one saying how much happier she is and how I didn't do 900 things right....WHY go out of the way and write that?!? Don't know...don't really care because its childish and so is this. You'll find one day how much better you are than her and how much better your life is.
Author Jiminy Cricket Posted September 23, 2013 Author Posted September 23, 2013 you know i really do want to be civil with her again, and get back with her. but now is not the time for that. i'm doing no contact to heal and better myself. i'm afraid if i ignore her even further, it will piss her off even more and add more negative feelings towards me.
Misfortune Posted September 23, 2013 Posted September 23, 2013 you know i really do want to be civil with her again, and get back with her. but now is not the time for that. i'm doing no contact to heal and better myself. i'm afraid if i ignore her even further, it will piss her off even more and add more negative feelings towards me. Why do we always start off so strong and then our resistance seems to slowly erode as the day goes on. "No...o....o....Ye...yes" Reply and give her the "jacket"
Simon Phoenix Posted September 23, 2013 Posted September 23, 2013 you know i really do want to be civil with her again, and get back with her. but now is not the time for that. i'm doing no contact to heal and better myself. i'm afraid if i ignore her even further, it will piss her off even more and add more negative feelings towards me. That's not your problem. If she's that immature to where she'll hold a grudge like that for life, then she's not someone who you should want to be friends with. Though I think you secretly want to keep a door open because you think it might help you reconcile with her. You really need to completely detach. If in the future your paths cross again and you can be friends, awesome, but that's a horrible idea right now. 2
Author Jiminy Cricket Posted September 23, 2013 Author Posted September 23, 2013 That's not your problem. If she's that immature to where she'll hold a grudge like that for life, then she's not someone who you should want to be friends with. Though I think you secretly want to keep a door open because you think it might help you reconcile with her. You really need to completely detach. If in the future your paths cross again and you can be friends, awesome, but that's a horrible idea right now. that's what i'm trying to say. the time is not right at all. we need to heal, she's adding more drama. i didn't say i was going to contact her, but you're right i am looking for a reconciliation, but if i give in and give her the jacket i get nowhere, i give her the power. if i ignore her, she gets angry, manipulates me, and hates me forever. its a lose lose situation.
Simon Phoenix Posted September 23, 2013 Posted September 23, 2013 that's what i'm trying to say. the time is not right at all. we need to heal, she's adding more drama. i didn't say i was going to contact her, but you're right i am looking for a reconciliation, but if i give in and give her the jacket i get nowhere, i give her the power. if i ignore her, she gets angry, manipulates me, and hates me forever. its a lose lose situation. I don't see why you would want to reconcile with this person. I'm sorry dude, but everything you've typed about her portrays her as an extreme jackass. Instead of wanting to reconcile with her, you need to figure out why you have so little self-worth that you want another chance with an awful person such as this. 2
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