Author justlooking463 Posted September 28, 2013 Author Posted September 28, 2013 So i talked to my ex lastnight on the phone, because she called me. Her cousin and i work at the same place, and she sometimes picks her up bc they live together. I make it a point to try to get out early when she is working because i don't know if she isgoing to be the one picking her up or not. I left early lastnight and i get half way home. She texts me and says. I got here way to early, i figured she was at my job, but i was already gone, so i replied, oh that sucks, I'm half way home now. She texted me after that and said jerk, then called and said she was just kiding about the jerk text, i guess she wanted to see me. then i made a comment to her about her new bf and how she might get in trouble if he finds out what happened between us last week. She totally made it sound like she didn't care. Said something like, u really think i care? I said yeah i do, u love him. She again made it sound like she didn't care and said u think I've never been broken up with, I'll be so heartbroken, in a jokingly way, making it soundsl as if she really didn't care, so i said if u feel that way about him why are u with him? She said its more like someone to hang out with and get some drinks with once in a while. She said he never pays any attention to her and always has other things going on that keep him busy. after that conversation, my thinking is that she is just using him to get over her and i and help her move on from it. Which is kind of bull****, idc about the other guys feelings. Bc honestly he has what i want. So i couls care less how it ends up for them. But people really need to get their heads out of their asses and stop playing games with peoples hearts while they go on witg their daily routine, like everything is fine, all while draggingthe people they say they love and want to be with right thru the mud.
Mariposa10 Posted September 28, 2013 Posted September 28, 2013 So i talked to my ex lastnight on the phone, because she called me. Her cousin and i work at the same place, and she sometimes picks her up bc they live together. I make it a point to try to get out early when she is working because i don't know if she isgoing to be the one picking her up or not. I left early lastnight and i get half way home. She texts me and says. I got here way to early, i figured she was at my job, but i was already gone, so i replied, oh that sucks, I'm half way home now. She texted me after that and said jerk, then called and said she was just kiding about the jerk text, i guess she wanted to see me. then i made a comment to her about her new bf and how she might get in trouble if he finds out what happened between us last week. She totally made it sound like she didn't care. Said something like, u really think i care? I said yeah i do, u love him. She again made it sound like she didn't care and said u think I've never been broken up with, I'll be so heartbroken, in a jokingly way, making it soundsl as if she really didn't care, so i said if u feel that way about him why are u with him? She said its more like someone to hang out with and get some drinks with once in a while. She said he never pays any attention to her and always has other things going on that keep him busy. after that conversation, my thinking is that she is just using him to get over her and i and help her move on from it. Which is kind of bull****, idc about the other guys feelings. Bc honestly he has what i want. So i couls care less how it ends up for them. But people really need to get their heads out of their asses and stop playing games with peoples hearts while they go on witg their daily routine, like everything is fine, all while draggingthe people they say they love and want to be with right thru the mud. I don't know why you still keep torturing yourself. As soon as I found out my ex was having sex with someone new, that was the straw that broke the camel's back. I knew I had to get myself out of this disgusting situation. Why don't you let her see what life is like without you?
bubbaganoosh Posted September 28, 2013 Posted September 28, 2013 Justlooking463 Look friend. Right now you see what you want to see and hear what you want hear and your missing the big picture and it should give you a great big clue of what type of girl your looking at. If she cheated on her boyfriend and had sex with you, what makes you think that she won't do the same thing to you? Tell me what makes you any more different than the boy friend. You also said that she's kind of materialistic. In other words "what are you willing to give me." Now ask yourself if she's the kind of girl you want to hitch your wagon to. She's shown you that she can't be trusted and the more the guy has the happier she will be. Ever think of what life would be like with her if you hit a rough spot financially? Or what are you going to do if she gets pissed off and decides to go out and some other dude gives her a bit of attention? It's all right there and she laid it all out there for you. Right now it seems to me that your thinking with your little head rather than your big head. IMHO your going to get your ass flamed down the road. 1
Simon Phoenix Posted September 28, 2013 Posted September 28, 2013 You are being a patsy right now. Stop talking to her. 1
Author justlooking463 Posted September 29, 2013 Author Posted September 29, 2013 I've been doing alot of thinking lately, and i have figured out why she hung around after getting get stuff and had sex with me and told me everything d she knew i wanted to hear. It was because she thought i hated her, i didn't hate her, i had just heard Some things i didn't like, like she was making me out to look like a stalker and that i wouldn't leave her alone. That kind of stuff. That infuriated me and it was good in a way bc it helped me start to use the anger i felt to keep my distance from her, but afew weeks before she did come to get her stuff she had asked if she could grab it while i was at work, i told get no bci wouldn't be home and the door would be locked,(i had changed the locks) she knew i did and then said idk why u would change the locks u know i would never steal from you, after i told her no she couldn't get in, all i said after that was yup to anything a she had to say, I think she got the point that i didn't want to speak with get Then last Friday, i went to run some errands on my day off, i ended up passing get while driving. I didn't wave or look her way, still noticed her car obviously. Then about 5 minutes after passing her she text me and ask if she can come get the rest of her stuff today. I Sayyid i would meet get there after she was done with work and help get get what she could, after itotally lost my cool and went off on her about how i really felt, said some mean things. She kept calling to explain, but i was so pissed i really didn't care.. After that she leaves work come to my house to get her stuff, waiting in my driveway when I get home. I helped her get what she could fit in her car, i was expecting her to just leave, she didn't, age started talking to me and asking things, so i did in return. One thing led to another and we had sex, told me how much she missed me and loved me, just every thing i wanted to hear. After thinking about it i now know she just did and said all of that to get the power back, she thought i hated her, and i don't think she liked that at all, so she hung out with me, told me what i wanted to hear, so she could be in control again. I can't believe i was so stupid. I have thought about it and thought about it and i need to use my anger of this and cut off all contact with her again. Today I'd day 2. I'm done posting?playing these games.
Romaks Posted September 29, 2013 Posted September 29, 2013 You know her better, man..you're right. Things could have also, very well, have been much worse, and at least you realized things now. Who knows what the hell she wants, and it's not your concern. You have to show that you value yourself, and that you're above her games. That's what I did. I told my ex (who broke up with me out of the blue), politely and respectfully that I will not continue to be her emotional crutch, since she expected that I'd remain in her life with the same insightful advice and emotional support that she's used to receiving. It shows that you're not a doormat, and you're already taking steps to move on. What it comes down to it is women are super emotional creatures, so they act on impulse and passion, but it's dangerous when you mix that with their age because then they'll start acting unpredictably. Best thing to do is to let her go, and move on. If she wakes up one morning knowing that you're the best one for her, you'll be the first to know, and you'll have a hard decision to make.
Author justlooking463 Posted September 30, 2013 Author Posted September 30, 2013 That's what I'm trying to do now, move on and focus on myself, focusing alot on working out, getting back into shape and being more confident, so the next time she does see me, she will see what shes missing out on, i already feel better about myself. Although i really love this woman and probably always will have an empty spot in my heart for her. I know its over and am finally ready toaccept it and move on. Shes with someone else now. I cant sit and dwell on it forever. I really do hope one morning she does wake up and realize I'm the one and i kind of hope its to latr for her at that point and im in a good place in my life and won't give her what she wants, just so she can feel a little bit of what I'm feeling. I know thats harsh but i know how hard this has affected me and how hard it hit me. I wasn't even like this when my ex wife left me and i was with her for 6 yrs. I've never been so heartbroken before and it just seems like its been so easy for her. So for her to have to feel like i did would be the ultimate payback i guess. Its going to be really hard for me to trust someone again, I've been burnt so many times, idk if i can, ive learned woman like to tell u what u want to hear to spare hurting you, at least in this case with my ex. Always told me she would never leave me for someone else and that's exactly what she did, among telling me other bs things. But I'm def moving on day 2 of NC was a sucess! Day 3 tomorrow, I'm sure i won't hear anything on her end bc she has spent the whole weekend with her new man. She said she said she wanted to come over Friday and hang out again, but im not going to push the issue. I'll leave that up to her. I'm sure she will bail out on it anyway, so ive prepared myself for it. Keeping th NC going!! 1
Mariposa10 Posted September 30, 2013 Posted September 30, 2013 That's what I'm trying to do now, move on and focus on myself, focusing alot on working out, getting back into shape and being more confident, so the next time she does see me, she will see what shes missing out on, i already feel better about myself. Although i really love this woman and probably always will have an empty spot in my heart for her. I know its over and am finally ready toaccept it and move on. Shes with someone else now. I cant sit and dwell on it forever. I really do hope one morning she does wake up and realize I'm the one and i kind of hope its to latr for her at that point and im in a good place in my life and won't give her what she wants, just so she can feel a little bit of what I'm feeling. I know thats harsh but i know how hard this has affected me and how hard it hit me. I wasn't even like this when my ex wife left me and i was with her for 6 yrs. I've never been so heartbroken before and it just seems like its been so easy for her. So for her to have to feel like i did would be the ultimate payback i guess. Its going to be really hard for me to trust someone again, I've been burnt so many times, idk if i can, ive learned woman like to tell u what u want to hear to spare hurting you, at least in this case with my ex. Always told me she would never leave me for someone else and that's exactly what she did, among telling me other bs things. But I'm def moving on day 2 of NC was a sucess! Day 3 tomorrow, I'm sure i won't hear anything on her end bc she has spent the whole weekend with her new man. She said she said she wanted to come over Friday and hang out again, but im not going to push the issue. I'll leave that up to her. I'm sure she will bail out on it anyway, so ive prepared myself for it. Keeping th NC going!! "I'm not going to push the issue"??? That's not enough, ask her to LEAVE YOU ALONE.
Author justlooking463 Posted September 30, 2013 Author Posted September 30, 2013 Like i said there will probably be nc from her end anyway, its just been me banging my head against the wall, always contacting her, that's what i meant about not pushing the issue. I'm not going top contact her about it. She says all these things, to me, but shows me different with her actions. She had pretty much gone right back to the way she was when she left me in the first place. Always to busy to talk, very short when i did try to contact her. I'm just banging my head against a wall and its doing me absolutely no good. So I'm going to stop and just go on with my life.
Mariposa10 Posted September 30, 2013 Posted September 30, 2013 Like i said there will probably be nc from her end anyway, its just been me banging my head against the wall, always contacting her, that's what i meant about not pushing the issue. I'm not going top contact her about it. She says all these things, to me, but shows me different with her actions. She had pretty much gone right back to the way she was when she left me in the first place. Always to busy to talk, very short when i did try to contact her. I'm just banging my head against a wall and its doing me absolutely no good. So I'm going to stop and just go on with my life. NC means not responding to your ex messages/calls, etc. Good luck. 1
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