NoClue2 Posted September 22, 2013 Posted September 22, 2013 So, I apologize since this is long, but I need to give details. I've been dating this guy for a month now. We made it official a few weeks ago. I really, really like him. The sex is great, he's the funniest guy I've ever been with, we get along perfectly when it's just the 2 of us. However, he's a mess. Every weekend we've hung out there's drama. He's a big partier and when he drinks he acts like a complete douchebag. The last weekend we went out he hit on other girls in front of me, claiming it was for his friend. I freaked out and wasn't having it so we fought about that. Then the next day he got so completely annihilated drunk that he wasn't even functioning. We almost got arrested for him acting like an idiot in public. When I went home I told him I didn't want to be with him because of the way he acts when he's drunk. He promised to relax on his drinking. I agree to give it another chance. Fast forward to this weekend, I went out with my gf and we decide to meet up with him and his friend at the bar later. He walks into the bar, immediately goes and talks to some other girl he knows for 5m before acknowledging me. I'm annoyed, but I get over it. A little later on I'm holding his hand as we walk outside and I let it go and he walks over to the dance floor with his friend. When I come back in they're dancing with 2 other girls. When he's finished I tell him to get away from me and that I don't wanna be with him anymore. At this point, a bunch of guys in the bar are getting annoyed with him and are hitting on me. He sees this and immediately tries to be buddy-buddy with them. They're not interested because of the way he's been acting. Everyone's telling me I can do better and I don't deserve to be treated this way, that he's an idiot. So a fight almost breaks out between these guys and my bf and his friend. In order to stop it I leave with him and his friend. He's not falling down drunk at this point so that's a plus. So yesterday we're hanging out at his house. We were great, not drinking, just relaxing and I'm kind of getting over everything at this point, then my friend calls. She tells me he pushed some girl up against the wall and tried to grind with her and that he tried to grab my friend's boobs and said he'd f*** her last night. I'm not sure what to believe because he denies it and this girl also tends to exaggerate a lot. So he keeps his word and he doesn't drink last night. However, I felt like having some drinks so me and his friend drank together. He's annoyed by this and starts acting like an *******. As I get more drunk, we get more into it. We fight. I tell him I don't think we're gonna work, it's a little hazy for me. I know that I went overboard with the anger last night. He says I'm high maintenance. He brings up that I said I'm not sure if we're gonna work this morning and I tell him I'm not sure, that I feel like I'm gonna get hurt. We agree to stay together. I'm so torn at this point as to what I should do. This guy just seems to be drama, non-stop. Even his best friend asked me why the hell I'm with him. I like him so much when it's just me and him but he can't seem to handle himself when he's drunk or out in public, and I'm not and never will be ok with him talking/flirting/dancing with other girls when we're together. I basically decided I was gonna end it with him today when he calls but I know I'm gonna be hurt. We're not kids. I'm 24, he's 26. I haven't liked someone like this since my ex and I broke 8 months ago, but I just don't trust him. What should I do?? Our personalities click but this is just so much. I can't see it getting any better. He's 26, not 18. If he was gonna change he'd have done it by now. My family and friends already hate him and want me to end it. Am I overreacting?? Is he underreacting? Is it possible it could ever work? Ugh! I'm a jealous person as it is and I feed into drama. I don't just let it slide. I'm already hurting thinking about ending it but I don't see what other choice I have. Thoughts??
Leigh 87 Posted September 22, 2013 Posted September 22, 2013 Wow. You have other options. You don't need to settle for a boy who dances with other girls when his in a "relationship" My ex was also the same. A mess when drunk. His behavior is alarming. Your family and friends are right. You absolutely shouldn't bother with this loser.
Author NoClue2 Posted September 22, 2013 Author Posted September 22, 2013 I know. I'm pumping myself up right now to end it. It's just hard because I haven't felt this way in a long time. I'd be an idiot to stay though, then I'm just asking for it. I'm thinking he's not gonna take it well when I end it, I can see him pursuing me hard, which will make it harder on me. It's just a mess.
heartshaped Posted September 22, 2013 Posted September 22, 2013 Honestly, I feel like you're both too immature for a LTR. You both are going out to bars, clubs, etc. every weekend and from the sounds of it getting very drunk. Reading this I thought the two of you were 21-22. 1
Author NoClue2 Posted September 22, 2013 Author Posted September 22, 2013 You could be right. I normally don't go out to the bars often though, I usually just have drinks at my friends house or hit up a pub, and I don't get stupid wasted every weekend. It's just since I met him that I've been partying like this.
MrCastle Posted September 22, 2013 Posted September 22, 2013 What are his good qualities exactly? Physical appearance aside.
Author NoClue2 Posted September 22, 2013 Author Posted September 22, 2013 He's hilarious - one of the funniest people I've ever met. He's caring and affectionate when we're together and he's not drunk. He has a killer personality. He works hard. He's loyal to his friends and family. He has a lot of great qualities, but not enough at this point to outweigh the bad.
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