GirlontheLam Posted September 22, 2013 Posted September 22, 2013 I thought I'd share the recap of my "date" last night. A few days ago I was out shopping and went to a local boutique. Ended up chatting with a guy there; he seemed interesting so I gave him my number. He was doing a bit of networking and talking about his new business venture. I went back a bit later since I had put something on hold, he was there again. The flirting escalated a bit since there was lots of chemistry. He called me up later and we made plans for dinner in my neighborhood for this weekend. He said he was on a budget and wanted to choose accordingly. We went to dinner and he dropped the first bomb: I have a kid (I am generally on the fence about this). He mentioned he comes from a dysfunctional family. We split the bill (obviously because he was budgeting) and went to a next door bar to continue the conversation. This is when the bombs kept coming. As my friend would say, he has all of the drama. Over the course of the evening he mentions the name he gave me was a pseudonym (he showed me his ID with his real name), he was recently fired for getting arrested (for not complying to stop and frisk), and his cars were repo-ed so he was saving up for a new car. He said he was in the process of figuring out his life. He also mentioned regretting the relationship with his baby's mama. I feel like I am missing a few things. But the list so far is pretty extensive. So here is what I am thinking in my head. The goal of your first date is to put your best foot forward. If this is the stuff that pops out in the early phases, imagine the other skeletons in the closet. Or he just felt compelled to pour his heart out to me because of my aura. That is just way too much drama. On the up note, glad we got all of that out of the way at the beginning. It would have been very easy to get lost in the chemistry and not reality. So have you had dates "open up to you" on a first date?
Woop1337 Posted September 22, 2013 Posted September 22, 2013 That's horrible. Never date anyone that has more problems than you. As a guy, even if my life was a mess. That's the last thing I will divulge to a girl, I'm on a date with. 1
Author GirlontheLam Posted September 22, 2013 Author Posted September 22, 2013 That's horrible. Never date anyone that has more problems than you. As a guy, even if my life was a mess. That's the last thing I will divulge to a girl, I'm on a date with. That's what I was thinking. As a drama free person, it made my head explode.
BikerAccnt Posted September 22, 2013 Posted September 22, 2013 I bet this guy doesn't get many second dates. I mean, seriously, unloading all your drama on the first date?
FitChick Posted September 22, 2013 Posted September 22, 2013 This is why I prefer OLD. You can find out a lot of stuff in a couple of emails and phone calls.
heartshaped Posted September 22, 2013 Posted September 22, 2013 I prefer this method actually. I'd rather someone tell me on the first date all the bad things about them then wait months down the road. I once was in a relationship with a guy before I knew he had a daughter. Left a horrible taste in my mouth. I don't have much baggage and/or drama, but I do tell men on the first date where I am in life, what I'm looking for, and if there's anything I feel might be a roadblock going forward.
spiderowl Posted September 22, 2013 Posted September 22, 2013 Well, at least he was honest - well, seemingly so. Who needs someone who hides his real ID though? It sounds like a mess to me.
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