TheMoonBug Posted September 22, 2013 Posted September 22, 2013 Hey everyone, I've been lurking around this site for a while, reading all of the other stories and what have you. I thought I was getting better with my break up, but I'm obviously not. Just an opinion here and there would be great, thank you. Okay, so long story short. I was in a long distance relationship with a guy that I met online. We started off as friends, to which was often me giving him relationship advice. When we were friends, I think he had two or three girlfriends under a year. Anyway, we started talking more and more, and eventually we started dating. And trust me, I was a skeptic that it would last, being that we met online and everything. But the thing is is that the relationship blossomed into something great... Or so I thought. Let me being with saying that I am older than he was. Not that it really mattered, but it could help me realize if this caused some of our problems. Anyway, it was all good and we even discussed how we were going to meet up with each other eventually. We had a ton in common, and he was always always always willing to learn about something I liked. We also shared everything, and I was so damn excited to either move in with him, or him move in with me. Eventually he started hurting my feelings. He did say a few things here and there that were quite rude, but once I confronted him about the things he said, he tried extremely hard to never act that way again. Now, I think everyone can agree that being in a long distance relationship is difficult, and I believe that part of being in one is to save your money, and send physical things to each other every now and then. The thing that hurt the most was he would never send anything. He always claimed he was too broke on my birthday, Christmas, anniversary, valentines, etc. But I would always find out that he went out and bought himself a $60 video game at least once or twice a month. He DID send things, my birthday present took him 9 months to send. I sent him things all the time. I was a starving student during most of the year, and I sent him quite a lot. During the summer I would work and save my money, but he never once tried to get out and find a job. I wanted to come and visit him for once, but I never would go and see him if he didn't put in some effort(financially). I became quit depressed. I tried to break it off with him, after one year of dating him. I knew that I needed to worry about myself, and that I needed to be alone. But I stayed with him, because he would always say things that would always draw me back in. Things like I am the most perfect girl that he has ever met, and that he would never be happy again without me. So I stayed. God dammit, I stayed. Around this point I was pretty much friendless, because when the relationship first started I was never really allowed to go out and see my friends, or go out and have any fun. I happily obliged to stay in and keep him company. I was drunk in love. Anyway, back to where I was becoming depressed. I stayed with him, because I felt guilty and that I was giving up on him. But again, as the second year started rolling around, I never received anything from him on time for my birthday(I got it 6 months later), and I was constantly bitching at him to do things for me. When he finally did do something nice, I wasn't happy with it because it was me putting in more effort than him. I started turning into a girlfriend from hell at this point. We were constantly fighting. One day I got a thought in my head, that maybe the reason why he would never do anything nice for me was because he had someone else. So one day I asked, and naturally I offended him. We fought, and we had a small break, only for me to find out about a couple lies and secrets that he hid from me. So I immediately thought that if he could lie about one thing, than sure as hell he has more lies. So, I snapped. I called his phone and I said a whole bunch of awful things that I regret now. He will not talk to me at all. I hurt him pretty bad, I know. But I was hurting for nearly a year and a half being with him. His sister has threatened me, his mother got involved(we became good friends during the relationship), and she said some pretty stupid things, imo. I was told constantly that he is waiting for me to settle down, and that he still loved me. His mom told me to wait for him to grow up, his step dad said that I made him so happy. Also, I bitched at him to get a job for nearly two years, and after we broke up, guess what he did. About two weeks after my snap attack, he went out and got a job. His mom claimed that he is trying to become a better person, and she even had the balls to say that he is learning to make sure he makes his next girlfriend feel like the most important thing in the universe. Now, since I've broken up with him I feel so completely alone. I've moved to a new city where I know no one, and I'm in a new school. I'm so broken from the break up, and after the stupid **** his family has told me, I just can't really move on. My school work is affected by this, and even my personality has changed. I'm constantly sad, and I always think about him. Was the relationship abusive? Was he just inexperienced with relationships? Do I need therapy? Am I the one to blame? How do I get over this? I'm sorry this was so long, and thank you for reading.
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