Tina747 Posted September 21, 2013 Posted September 21, 2013 I met a man online who seemed nice, intelligent, educated and attractive. He lives about an hour South of me. We corresponded a bit for about two weeks and we seemed to have a lot of common interests like enjoying the outdoors, live music, etc, but he mentioned in both his online profile and also, casually, in an email that contained his lists of interests, that he also like to go to Casinos (very occasionally) and only gambles (just a little - he lives in a bigger city than me and there is one Casino about 20 min where he lives).... but this was from a list of his many interests, and although I never mentioned it was something I enjoyed too, I didn't think much of it at the time. However, note, we do not live in Nevada or anything, so it is not like I live in a State with a lot of Casinos nearby. Just a few a bit aways.... there is also one like 30 minutes North from where I live. Anyway, he keeps asking when I might be down where he lives, so we can meet for the first time. Well, for me personally, I want the man to come to my town first when first meeting. Others might disagree with me, but that is just my personal opinion and personal preference that the man should come to the woman for first date (or we can meet half way). But he just never offers to come up, just wants me to do all the travelling. Finally, I hinted maybe he could come up to where I live to meet. He agrees, only after I hint, BUT he wants our first date to be meet for coffee at a Casino a half North from where I live... this makes travel time an hour and half for him instead of an hour just so we could go to a Casino. Note, there are tons of fun thinks to do in my town...so why does he want to travel an hour and half on the outskirts of town to meet at a Casino for coffee. I did decline (Not that I think there is anything wrong with Casinos, I am sure some people might think they are fun, even though I am not into it - But a first date? I got a weird feeling about this and tend to go with my gut) but I am going to reframe from what I personally think about this because I would like to hear your objective opinions. How would you respond if someone asked you to meet at a Casino for a first date? Do you think this is strange that that is how a man would want his first in-person meeting with a woman to be - at a Casino? Why? Curious!
Yookie Posted September 21, 2013 Posted September 21, 2013 He wanted to meet for coffee so no, I don't find it strange. If you wanted to do something else then stop with the "hinting" and suggest something!!!
CarrieT Posted September 21, 2013 Posted September 21, 2013 Easy answer - it is a coffee date and might last 20-30 minutes. If it doesn't work out, he has travelled a distance that will enable him to do something else that interests him. No brainier... Personally, I think it is unreasonable for you to expect a guy to drive the entire distance... 6
Author Tina747 Posted September 21, 2013 Author Posted September 21, 2013 (edited) Easy answer - it is a coffee date and might last 20-30 minutes. If it doesn't work out, he has travelled a distance that will enable him to do something else that interests him. No brainier... Yes, I thought something similar...but do you think that because out of all the places he chose to meet for the first time he chose a Casino might mean he has a gambling problem? (yes, for coffee, but AT a Casino) Edited September 21, 2013 by Tina747
TheGuard13 Posted September 21, 2013 Posted September 21, 2013 Not everyone who visits a casino has a gambling problem. You're overthinking this.
curlygirl40 Posted September 21, 2013 Posted September 21, 2013 I think you're overthinking also. I live near a casino and have had several first dates there. For one there are a lot of places to choose from to meet. Restaurants, coffee shops, bars where you can sit on a couch and be more comfortable. If you do click, there's something you can do after a meal or a drink...walk around and people watch, visit one of the bars to hear some live music, etc. At least that's my experience. It's a safe environment. Only one time did a guy I was with decide to gamble and I have been on probably 10 first/second dates there.
gaius Posted September 21, 2013 Posted September 21, 2013 This guy is just way too driven to be at a casino come hell or high water and it just seems...off. It's almost like he's using their meeting as an excuse to get into the casino. He's just showing no enthusiasm for their meeting at all - to him, it's all about the casino. I'd tell him to pack his buddies up in his car and take THEM out gambling. Pffft. He's traveling a bit of a distance to see her so it's smart he's making it some place he can still enjoy even if there's 0 chemistry or she doesn't even bother showing up. As Carrie said. She wanted him to come down to her area and he agreed so I don't know what the big problem is. The first time I went to see the one girl I dated long distance I picked a spot about an hour from her (after I traveled much longer than that), and near a baseball stadium when the home team was playing that night. So it would not be travel wasted no matter what. Didn't mean I wasn't into her. The whole trip was planned so I could have a chance to see her. Which seems to be the case with this guy as well.
FitChick Posted September 22, 2013 Posted September 22, 2013 Look at it this way, if he gambles and wins big while with you, you will become his good luck charm. You can tell him that since you've brought him luck, you want him to buy you something from the shops while you are there.
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