JoelBarish Posted September 21, 2013 Posted September 21, 2013 I miss my girlfriend. I miss the person I could trust fully with my heart. I miss my best friend. I miss the person who thought the world of me. In my girlfriend's eyes I could do no wrong. No matter how hard I was on myself, my girlfriend was always there to lend support.My girlfriend couldn't get enough of me and wanted me in her life always. Now my ex, I don't miss her at all. My ex is cold. My ex is unresponsive. My ex doesn't want to hear about any leftover, mushy feelings that I have. My ex wants nothing to do with me other than to show pity towards me so she can tell herself how good of a person she is. My ex doesn't want to be with me. I will miss my girlfriend always but I will never miss my ex. 13
AnyaNova Posted September 21, 2013 Posted September 21, 2013 You have a great point. I miss m (no longer) boyfriend, but I really don't miss my ex. He is a complete stranger to me. 3
Author JoelBarish Posted September 21, 2013 Author Posted September 21, 2013 Yeah, I know. I swear they are two different people.
thishatteredsymphony Posted September 21, 2013 Posted September 21, 2013 This is an interesting take. And I agree with it. 2
Author JoelBarish Posted September 21, 2013 Author Posted September 21, 2013 This is an interesting take. And I agree with it. You know I think it helps to think this way. It helps me separate the good memories that I cherish from the person I don't want in my life now. 1
clementyne Posted September 21, 2013 Posted September 21, 2013 (edited) This is an interesting take. And I agree with it. +1. Very well put, JoelB. Love the distinction between the two- who they were versus who they are now- so apt and so true. I felt it this morning, when I woke up after having a rare dream about him. In my dream he was sweet, caring and warm, just like he used to be. He was my bf again and everything was okay. Then I woke up and reality threw a glass of cold water in my face. All the warmness vanished and he became my cold, uncaring ex again. It made me so sad...like dreaming of someone who's dead, but in the dream they're alive and well. Then you wake up and remember and the pain hits you once again. Edited September 21, 2013 by clementyne 3
Author JoelBarish Posted September 21, 2013 Author Posted September 21, 2013 +1. Very well put, JoelB. Love the distinction between the two- who they were versus who they are now- so apt and so true. I felt it this morning, when I woke up after having a rare dream about him. In my dream he was sweet, caring and warm, just like he used to be. He was my bf again and everything was okay. Then I woke up and reality threw a glass of cold water in my face. All the warmness vanished and he became my cold, uncaring ex again. It made me so sad...like dreaming of someone who's dead, but in the dream they're alive and well. Then you wake up and remember and the pain hits you once again. If only there was some way to FORGET it all...lol 1
Golden Cobra Posted September 21, 2013 Posted September 21, 2013 Buddy, you could not have put it better Enjoy your happiness man. 1
keepontruckin Posted September 22, 2013 Posted September 22, 2013 Once they start spreading their legs for someone else, their true colors start to show... 1
clementyne Posted September 22, 2013 Posted September 22, 2013 If only there was some way to FORGET it all...lol Yeah, like in ESOTSM! lol 1
Author JoelBarish Posted September 22, 2013 Author Posted September 22, 2013 Yeah, like in ESOTSM! lol I am not familiar with that film. Is it new?
AnyaNova Posted September 22, 2013 Posted September 22, 2013 I am curious, since the topic of forgetting came up. And here I don't mean our exes as defined by the dichotomy presented by this post, but our boyfriends and girlfriends no longer... If you could eternal sunshine of the spotless mind-it (and here I don't mean getting back together again like they do at the end, but rather forgetting completely), would you? If you could erase them completely and all the experiences? Would you?
Author JoelBarish Posted September 22, 2013 Author Posted September 22, 2013 I am curious, If you could erase them completely and all the experiences? Would you? That's a good question. It seems so tempting to want to erase the pain associated with the memories of what is lost. My answer might depend on when you ask me. A month from now I might have a different answer than I do today. Today my answer is no. I have had painful breakups before. When I look back at those bad breakups I no longer associate them with pain. But I do have the good memories to remember. I have the bad ones too but they no longer hurt the same way. Besides, when I am an old man, all I will have is my memories to keep me warm. A lifetime with no loss remembered is a lifetime with no remembered love.
DeavyJones Posted September 22, 2013 Posted September 22, 2013 ex girlfriend back to me 3 times but i dont want never miss her After the separation of the long-term is not good to start again
ellowmay Posted September 23, 2013 Posted September 23, 2013 Amen to this OP. Its a good way to look at it. 1
love1336x Posted September 23, 2013 Posted September 23, 2013 Now my ex, I don't miss her at all. My ex is cold. My ex is unresponsive. My ex doesn't want to hear about any leftover, mushy feelings that I have. My ex wants nothing to do with me other than to show pity towards me so she can tell herself how good of a person she is. My ex doesn't want to be with me. I drilled this into my head almost everyday when I want to break NC.... 2
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