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Why do I love a gay man?


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I mean I feel like we are soul mates love. He did lead me on for a bit, telling me he was bi, and he does have a daughter. Was engaged twice to two different woman, that's what I really knew he was gay. 9 years ago we met, we've reconnected due to facebook, but really I still wish we could be together.

 

Speaking of which, my high school best male friend turned out to be gay! I went to prom with him twice! It's just sad to me, that I carry feelings for men that are really gay. My ex husband, loved me deeply, I did not love him. Instead I love men who I can't have basically because they'd rather have a man.

 

It's heartbreaking. It has taken me years to get over him, and I'm still not really over the dream of us being together. As if I can turn a mostly gay man straight. Two other women couldn't, one even birthed his child!

 

How do I really let go of the fantasy? Marriage between gays is now legal in my state, since August. His last post he was visiting his boyfriends family in another state. I still want him, he's balding, but he's a soul mate! One that wasn't meant to be obviously. But I still wish it were.

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