EJBusch Posted September 19, 2013 Posted September 19, 2013 I'm having a really rough time right now... I was referred over here and thought this could be a great introductory post. I recently broke up with my girlfriend. Or perhaps it should be said that she broke up with me. Would have been 4 years on the 23rd. I have pretty aggressive social anxiety disorder, and that is a big issue. She really doesn't like that I have it, but she has always been incredibly accepting. That said, it has been a big problem here. It prevents us from going on a lot of different kinds of dates or spending time with her family. That slowly started the divide, I think... She told me she is no longer happy. Sunday night she told me she was going to move into her own townhome. Without me. We've lived together for over 3 years so this felt like a huge step backwards to me... Well, I told her that we really need to either be together and live together or not be together. I didn't want to take that step backwards. Then I started a new job the next morning. Then Tuesday night we talked and we discussed how we could do better. Weekly date night, couples counseling, etc. That night was great. We watched TV, drank some wine, were happy. The next morning we woke up, I got ready for work and she told me she couldn't do this... She isn't happy and needs to move out. Eff. So now the past 2 days her parents have been helping her move out. So now I'm in our town home, all the pictures are off the walls, the couch and chair are gone. Yet all the memories are here. The curtains have missing spots here and there because of our (Now her) dog, and a million other things. Everywhere. I'll be moving in with my parents sometime soon. Unfortunately we also lived there before we were able to get into here... So I have tons of memories from there, too. I can't escape it. I really want to get back with her, but unfortunately I have no idea what the future holds... I am trying to better myself and hope that she sees my progress and is happy about it. Even if we don't get back together... I'll at least feel better, right? Anyway... That's my story.
Eddie007 Posted September 19, 2013 Posted September 19, 2013 None of us know what the future holds. I like many others on here are going through he same things you. I too was with my fiance for 4+ years and we lived together for 3+ years. Like your ex she came to me and said she was not happy. It stung like hell but I knew she was becoming distant over the previous months. All I could do was pack my stuff and leave. We ave not seen or reached out to each other since that day which was 30 some days ago. She was my whole life, but it gets easier over time. I still love and miss her, but some times we have to respect their decision as the best thing for both parties at the moment. The only way I can show her my love now is to let her try to find happiness without me. Maybe se will maybe se won't. Time changes people. You all need time apart to heal and grow Good luck and stay strong my friend. 2
barky2 Posted September 19, 2013 Posted September 19, 2013 I know right now its tough. And I'm sorry you're going thru this. But I want you to sit back , take a breath and think about it this way...be excited for the future..don't be scared of it. Your best days haven't been lived yet. I promise you that. I know the feeling of being in a house surrounded by memories. Ive moved many times because of it. Stay strong. Barky 3
No_closure Posted September 19, 2013 Posted September 19, 2013 hey there EJ. Sorry you are going through this mess.... We are all in the same boat or have been. When you said we were happy then the next morning she up and left is what I am going through. He up and decided to walk out no explanation. Been 3 weeks now and I am shattered and confused and left wondering why? I know it probably doesn't make you feel better but HANG IN THERE! Your wound is so fresh don't make any rash decisions and don't beg her to come back. I found out the hard way begging and pleading for answers is not going to help. Right now you need to have No Contact. Stay strong and keep us updated. I am so sorry you are going through this... 1
HereWeGoAgain1 Posted September 19, 2013 Posted September 19, 2013 ...be excited for the future..don't be scared of it. This, a thousand times this. 1
Author EJBusch Posted September 20, 2013 Author Posted September 20, 2013 Thanks everyone for the supportive and helpful words! I'm definitely hoping to make it a lot better for myself. And I think she will really appreciate all the hard work I'm putting into it. It could end up being a great step for the both of us, but even if it isn't, I'm going to make my life great! 1
barky2 Posted September 20, 2013 Posted September 20, 2013 Do it for yourself. That's moving on. Barky 1
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