Stay Posted September 19, 2013 Posted September 19, 2013 There's a girl I've been getting to know for a few months now and we hit it off, a lot of common interest and we can literally finish each other's sentences. Well that all ended when she got back with her ex, it hurts but it wasn't like we were committed or in a relationship. Anyways since that incident I couldn't seem to let go of our friendship we have developed and continued to talk as friends. It felt so good to connect with someone like that, I've never talked to anyone with such similar interest before. But recently I just felt like I still had feelings and I'm sure she does too and didn't think it was fair to her bf, they've only been together for a few months. So I pretty much cut contact at least for now. I also felt she had choices and had too much control over the situation and I needed to take control and not let her have the best of both worlds. Was this something that was done right? I need some insights from others. I really don't want to get in the way of the relationship that's why I tried to be friends incase in the future we can rekindle what we had and possibly start a relationship, that's why I tried to stay friends. 1
MrCastle Posted September 19, 2013 Posted September 19, 2013 She has feelings for you but as a friend. When it came time to decide between you and a guy who she already broke up with and knows his pros and cons, she went with him again. She's not fully over him. And even if she ends up dumping him, doesn't mean you're next in line. I've been there. -Girl had boyfriend -Had "feelings for me" -Broke up with boyfriend -Went back with him two weeks later (although she did call me at 2am once during that time to meet her at a bar. I declined but probably would have slept with her then) -Broke up with him again -Was single for three weeks -Got in a relationship with new guy I want to say that my personal belief is she already had that new guy on the side, which is probably what lead to her break up and getting into a relationship so quickly, so if her "feelings" for me were sexual, that should have been me that she ended up dating and not the new guy. When a girl likes you and has a chance to be with you, she'll take it. Whether you're unemployed, a serial cheater, a dead beat, an addict, a single dad with a jealous baby mother, etc -- they throw themselves into that drama regardless. If a possible relationship with you looks good on paper and she has the chance to be with you and still doesn't take it -- she never felt romantic feelings for you.
StanMusial Posted September 19, 2013 Posted September 19, 2013 You and her can be bffs and loan each other a pair of panties.
Author Stay Posted September 19, 2013 Author Posted September 19, 2013 (edited) I don't think she or I ever had that feeling that were romantic yet. To be honest we both weren't taking things seriously and just seeing where it'll go but I found myself enjoying it way more than expected. It was hard for her to make the decision but I do understand she chose him over me and I'm not sure if it's because they had more or if it was another reason but I didn't want to sit around on the sidelines so that's why I decided to cut contact and walk. That also allowed me to take control of the situation instead of letting her have all the control. Our feelings were sexual though so I don't really think it was a friend thing. Edited September 19, 2013 by Stay
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