Emma1234 Posted September 19, 2013 Posted September 19, 2013 Hey guys, I received some brilliant advice last time from people who helped me see I'm not ready for anything with my ex. Especially not a coffee. He has just text again, saying he thinks we need to clear the air before we see each other at uni. Do I respond to politely decline the coffee invitation or just ignore it so that he gets the message? Thank you
JDPT Posted September 19, 2013 Posted September 19, 2013 Silence is your best response. There isn't anything to "clear" at this point and nothing to look forward to. Things have been well established and solidified long ago. I wouldn't contemplate the thought of formulating a response. Remain strong and committed to NC, he is simply picking at you.
Philosoraptor Posted September 19, 2013 Posted September 19, 2013 No need to clear anything. The relationship is over and in the past. Just hit delete and go about enjoying your day. 1
Author Emma1234 Posted September 19, 2013 Author Posted September 19, 2013 Thank you, needed to hear this. I'll delete and ignore, committing myself to my complete healing now and I know that no contact is the way to do this. It doesn't matter what he thinks about me and whether I'm being 'petty' and ignoring him. In the long term it's my healing that's the most important thing. 1
fresh-one Posted September 19, 2013 Posted September 19, 2013 If there was love in your relationship, and it was real love, you should talk to him, yo seem like your in need of people to back up a decision to avoid him when there is a part of you that wants to see him, only advice I can give you is that when your heart is in conflict with your brain it doesn'T just go away, just my 2 cents... Good luck
Author Emma1234 Posted September 19, 2013 Author Posted September 19, 2013 Before I was searching for ways to say yes to his offer but finally I'm seeing it would only help him not me. I loved him, that is what caused the pain I've been through and what is causing this conflict. But he has hurt me beyond words and I just want to be free of him and the pain so that I can get on with my life. He doesn't want to reconcile, he just wants to catch up, he was very specific about that. Ignoring him feels harsh but it's the only thing I know how to do properly.
lauri Posted September 19, 2013 Posted September 19, 2013 Before I was searching for ways to say yes to his offer but finally I'm seeing it would only help him not me. I loved him, that is what caused the pain I've been through and what is causing this conflict. But he has hurt me beyond words and I just want to be free of him and the pain so that I can get on with my life. He doesn't want to reconcile, he just wants to catch up, he was very specific about that. Ignoring him feels harsh but it's the only thing I know how to do properly. Ignoring doesn't seem harsh. You are moving on and showing him you don't need him. Just do what I'd best for you - your emotions will tell you otherwise but you need to fight them and remain strong!! 2
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